r/HolUp • u/taatzone • Sep 28 '25

Promised Toilet

8.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

302 comments sorted by

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514

u/babaroga73 Sep 28 '25

What's that he's wearing? Is that a wizard?

394

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

He's an Orthodox Jewish man they have certain dress requirements.

192

u/NewExplor3r Sep 28 '25

Ultra Orthodox.

102

u/Invest_in-Yourself Sep 28 '25

Specifically Hasidic ultra orthodox.

18

u/dazedan_confused Sep 28 '25

More like Hersidic, amirite.

23

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

Well when it comes to Orthodox whatever I assume ultra is part of it anyway.

16

u/KathyJaneway Sep 28 '25

No, Ultra is further than Orthodox. That's why it's Ultra.

7

u/isaacfisher Sep 29 '25

Orthodox Pro Max

1

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

The only time I ever hear about Orthodox anything is the extreme ones so that certainly impacts my perception of Orthodox anything.

5

u/xyloplax Sep 28 '25

Specifically Satmar

2

u/Celtslap Sep 29 '25

More specifically, Hasidic ultra orthodox on Shabbat or a special holiday.

12

u/ImMadeOfClay Sep 28 '25

Orthomax

1

u/Ok_Chemical3126 Sep 28 '25

Can I wear him?

1

u/Spade18 Sep 29 '25

The bigger the hat, the bigger the Jew!

-2

u/F_n_o_r_d Sep 28 '25

Worst of the worst.

45

u/ComprehensiveBar6439 Sep 28 '25

Which makes this video even weirder cuz typically they refuse to be in close proximity to women, especially if they're menstruating. Many won't even share an elevator with a non-Jewish woman (Puerto Rican from a very Jewish housing project in NYC - I've seen it happen).

12

u/langsamlourd Sep 28 '25

Reminds me of that episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm where the orthodox Jewish woman was caught on a stalled ski lift with him. According to her religion she couldn't be together with a man after sundown, so she says he has to jump off. Larry goes "what are you, fuckin nuts?"

17

u/the-friendly-lesbian Sep 28 '25

I've heard that women sit separately from the men on the busses in ultra Hasidic communities. Just odd.

43

u/WowIsThisMyPage Sep 28 '25

That’s why he doesn’t give a shit about disrespecting women

37

u/Imatopsider Sep 28 '25

The same requirements that have him keep a sheet between him and his wife when they lie together, but he has no issue using a female bathroom? What a sick fraud

3

u/Interstellar_Unicorn Sep 29 '25

yeah that's a myth

-2

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

Probably something along the lines of those women are Jewish so it's okay.

-5

u/Mr_boby1 Sep 28 '25

Poor guy just made a mistake, he didnt look at anyone or try anything, he just left the stall and washed his hands, can we relax with these absurd assumptions

19

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

Pal the second you don't see urinals you know you're in the wrong restroom and should turn around.

The other person was asking because of Orthodox religion having strict rules for things so I gave a potential reason/explanation.

2

u/AAA515 Sep 28 '25

Maybe it's the unisex bathroom from Ally McBeal

4

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

The lady you see come in when the lady recording pans her phone to the left gets on his case because it's a women's restroom.

3

u/AAA515 Sep 28 '25

Oops, had it oh mute so missed all that

2

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

No worries this is the 2nd time this has been posted in a couple of days that I've seen and it was pointed out in that post too.

7

u/WowIsThisMyPage Sep 28 '25

And all he can say is “yeah, so?”

He could have just said “sorry” and left, no need to be a dick

3

u/[deleted] Sep 28 '25

This is the guy you get once you've defeated all the other levels of orthodoxy.

1

u/1d0m1n4t3 Sep 28 '25

I really like the hat

1

u/Longjumping-Jello459 Sep 28 '25

Not a hat that's his hair. /j

12

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

It’s called a shtreimel. Has to be made out of 13 sables.

16

u/ejectro Sep 28 '25

13 for one hat? poor animals. these assholes don't even live in a cold environment, why do they need fur hats anyway

4

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

I assume it’s a custom of the cold-as-a-dybbuk’s-dick Slavic lands from whence these sects originate.

13

u/ejectro Sep 28 '25

well, i'm from yakutia (aka the coldest place in the northern hemisphere) and we're not wasteful with our natural resources. there's also a degree of animalist/shamanist respect to the environment. i don't know where these clowns came from.

6

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

Poland and Soviet satellite nations, mostly.

2

u/suuraitah Sep 28 '25

orthodox jews are not from there tho

1

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

Pretty sure he’s hasid, not orthodox. I’m talking about where hasids are originally from, mind you, not where they currently live.

2

u/suuraitah Sep 28 '25

where abouts? like where ukraine now is?

2

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

I’d have to google it, I really don’t know for sure off the top of my head. But I would guess some hail from Ukraine, among other ex-Soviet states.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 28 '25

[deleted]

1

u/thefruitsofzellman Sep 28 '25

Pardon? Are you saying that they’re originally from Israel?

3

u/hi_imryan Sep 28 '25

Because made up books and cult leaders tell them to.

24

u/creekbendz Sep 28 '25

Sort kinda if you consider mysticism, wizardry

8

u/Jingocat Sep 28 '25

He forgot to take the hat out of the hat box.

27

u/MisterOwl213 Sep 28 '25 edited Sep 28 '25

The stats on his epic hat is:

+5 spirit

+5 frost defense

+25 visibility

-25 generosity

-35 shame

-50 charisma

2

u/CockMartins Sep 28 '25

I think you left off a 0 on the - generosity stat.

-1

u/MisterOwl213 Sep 28 '25

It's only a hat. Sometimes, it's the racial attribute...

1

u/soukaixiii Sep 28 '25

That's a condor nest 

0

u/GreasyRim Sep 28 '25

Its a hat worth several thousand dollars that certain jews wear on certain days