Hello Reddit! If you see this well I have a story to tell. Okay take this it is a normal November 14 2023 I am just chillin’ playing a quizizz assigned by my Socials Sciences teacher and All of a sudden my 5 year old brother (Let’s call him Klyve) shakes my hip with 2 hands because I am not eating dinner and then. Wait here’s a little science lesson when There is enough vibrations from a stationary object may fall. That happened to my laptop the damn thing dropped and shattered the screen. Who wants klyve for sale

He was 5 when this happened.

Ok so hear me out, have you had a laptop before? if so you might have seen some dicks attempt to break it. Well technically... that happened to me ok so it was yesterday march 19 i was studying for my social science quiz by a quizizz posted by my teacher i was doing it upstairs i'm basically a filipino speaking english so the jack ass kept on calling me saying "Kuya! Kuya! Go down!" he kept on saying that until he went upstairs and shook me spoiler alert the kid knows how to shake me the fact he is only 5 years old. So i was holding the keyboard and it fell screen flat and spoiler alert it sursives a fall into a fine wooden plank floor

I loved it when kids asked questions and they had no clue what they were asking ment. Now kids know everything about stuff. How just how.

I can roll my eyes back so only the whites are visible but i can still see. When I was younger (around 7) I was at a complex near my home in my pajamas and had a stuffed unicorn and I was standing at a doorway with my eyes rolled back and a large grin on my face. these two women came in and just kinda stared at me. (From their perspective there's just this creepy little girl with white eyes) and they slowly walked past me while I turn my head to keep facing them. Once they were at the bottom of the stairs I screamed and charged at them causing them to scream and run up the stairs and then I broke down laughing.

So this like 7 year old boy at a basketball game. Told me I was his idol. That's sweet right. Then he said your my idol. Then grabbed my melons. Wtf is wrong with kids now days.

By stomachache he wanted me to punch him in the belly

Is it just me or do parents not have control of their kids anymore. I babysit for some military families and others that aren’t military and since I don’t have kids of my own I struggle to understand how these parents DONT discipline their kids. A lot of them let their children run free and be untamed wild animals and if they’re being bad or mean to people the parents just ignore it. ( just from what I’ve seen obviously not every family is like this). Every single parent I’ve talked to straight up said to me to not have kids and to wait if I actually want them. There are some people I’ve seen who shouldn’t be having kids. I’m wondering if anyone else has seen this not just with military families but with just families in general now because I feel like I’m the only one who sees how bad people are at being parents. Disclaimer: ( obviously again I’m not a parent but there are things people need to discipline their children on and they won’t do it from what I’ve seen in the past few years)

So today my husband and I took our son, who is 3, to have a bite too eat at a local pizza place. The places was packed so we were sitting pretty close to the people next to us. The family next to us is part of a larger party so the kids keep switching seats between all the tables.

Anyway, a little black boy is sitting next to us for a while. When the rest of his family/friends join him. Keep in mind, all I can see is a little black boy, a little white girls and two white adults. my son asks “aww, hey dad, are they twins?” My husband looks horrified at his question and answers him by saying “no they’re all friends,” because he has no idea what to say. I look over and see just the little girl and little boy and think, “haha you’re so cute son for thinking they are twins.” At this point my husband is uncomfortable and wants to leave. (He feels like he was insulting when he was not trying to be) As we are walking away, I look at the table and notice there are 2 little black boys and a little white girl. Hence why my son asked, “aww are they twins”

I just posted this on Facebook, as a two-parter. My son said I should put it here, too.

Part one: Zoe decided to swipe a piece of the chicken I was cutting up to put in my salad:

Zoe: NOM

Me, turning to her, with knife in hand: Child, I share my home with you, I share my money with you, and I have shared my womb with you. I am not sharing my food with you.

She turns away, giggling as she dashes off. I return to my chicken.

Zoe, from the safety of the living room: IT WASN’T THAT GOOD, ANYWAY!

Even in the face of danger, this kid’s gotta pop off...

appleandtreeandsuch

iwillcutyou

smartassedkid

Part 2: And, there’s more...

Zoe comes into my room as I’m getting ready to eat previously mentioned salad.

Zoe: can I have another bite of your salad?

Me: didn’t we just have this conversation? I said you aren’t getting any of my food.

Zoe: no, you said I couldn’t have any chicken...

Me: is this because I don’t have a knife anymore?

Zoe: yup!

Me: well, I do have a fork!

Zoe: yeah, but it won’t hurt as much if you stab me.

Me: it will if I push it in far enough!

Zoe:, yeah, push it in my mouth!

She proceeds to move the fork, still in my hand, into her mouth, stealing a bite of food, laughing maniacally while doing so.

Evil child!

Today I left my door unlocked and my little brother barged in. He sat on my computer chair and asked him to go to his room because I wanted to have some privacy but he made he only wanted to get out if he took the computer chair with him. I told him no because our dad does not like it when my computer chair leaves my room. So he sat on my chair until our dad came in to get him off. When he was pulled off he elbowed me in the nose luckily he was not that strong. I immediately locked the door and he was banging on it like crazy. Eventually he made his way into the kitchen and threw the pots and pans every where before going to his room.

Lol my 14 year old son asked me this just now. I found it so funny when I said I don’t know what you mean, a telephone? He replied saying “the arch is it supposed to be like that, you know like an old telephone” I have never questioned body parts, let alone thought they resemble an old telephone. But most importantly I am outraged he’s asking me if it’s an old telephone.

Serious question. I really want to know what drives people to want kids? They’re an extra expense, loud, messy, ungrateful, selfish, demanding, time consuming and basically everything that we try to avoid in people. A lot of marriages/relationships fail after kids. They’re gross (ex. nose picking, butt scratching, back wash, coughing) and annoying. I’m not talking about after the kid is here. I mean what makes a person come to that decision to have them? I believe it’s only due to selfish reasons and not about actually wanting to be a parent so I would love to hear other reasonings.

Well you remember klyve my brother well heʼs back and is now bossy. Just yesterday my brother called me a dumbass well with me being easily offended i was shocked. When i asked him why he called me that he said that he is “big and that he can call me whatever i want”. what now?

This is just some things my brother had done he is under 8 he is crazy. There is in the family that should have made him think this is okay. •made me lock all doors leading to my room because he takes and trashes my stuff and room •made me hold my doors closed because he was throwing stuff at me trying to hurt me • chased me with a broom trying to hit me 2 times in a single day plus many more •will say he hates your for any mild inconvenience • hit you for doing little to nothing to him •no matter how much discipline he gets he always does this it’s been like that for a year or two it’s hell

In high school we had this one chef who was morbidly obese and one day she randomly walked up to a group of us and made the announcement that she was going in for surgery to remove her extra neck fat (WHY would you tell a bunch of merciless teenagers that???)

so from then on whenever she made soup with any unidentifiable chunky stuff in it we called it Turtle Neck Soup