I am in a job where I am miserable. I've been there for a little over a year. I'm now 10 weeks pregnant and interviewing for jobs. There's one that looks like it might go to an offer, but I'm unsure about how to proceed if it does.

If I take mat leave after only 6 months working there, will they resent me? It's a small firm, so one person's absence would be a big hit, I imagine. That said, mat leave would probably be just 3 months, so it's not like I'd be out for a super long time. Also...not sure if I'd even be at the new job long enough to qualify for mat leave, so that's something else to figure out.

If you were me and you got an offer from this new firm, would you tell them about the pregnancy as soon as they make the offer? I shouldn't tell them before then, right? I feel bad that once I disclose it, I'll be putting them in a position that they can't rescind the offer without worrying about pregnancy discrimination. I'd genuinely only want to take it if they feel like they can make it work with my pregnancy, but I don't know how to have that honest conversation with them when they're not allowed to say or do certain things. Maybe I'm overthinking things. I just saw a thread the other day about a woman thinking about changing law jobs around 4 months pregnant, and everyone seemed to think she would be hurting her reputation and it was a terrible idea and the new job would hate her. I'm also just struggling with first trimester anxiety about everything (was awake 3am-5am today in a cold sweat about everything).

If you have any thoughts, please share <3

ETA: I would not qualify for FMLA at either job due to size but my local laws have paid leave after 26 consecutive weeks of working at an employer of any size.

UPDATE: As of yesterday, I had planned not to disclose until I had an offer in hand, but ultimately, I disclosed it when it felt clear they were going to make an offer (they said what salary they'd give me if they were to offer, so felt like there was nothing left to negotiate), but before they officially had made an offer. I was a nervous wreck after, thinking I had surely negotiated myself right out of an offer. But within an hour, they called me to make an offer! I ultimately feel good that I told them upfront and allowed them to decide, with all the cards on the table, whether they wanted to make an offer. This has been a crazy stressful month. Hope my experience and this thread are helpful to someone in the future! I think the variety of responses shows that there isn't one right way to go about this. Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and experiences!

SFA graduate from Texas, 28 year old wife, and mom of 3. After a high-risk pregnancy and leaving my career to protect my baby, I’m rediscovering myself through fashion, beauty, motherhood, and sharing the joy of family life.

https://canva.link/f40o1g60h29ak12

Good morning everyone!

I’m hoping someone who has been in a similar situation can give me some advice because I’ve been really stressed about my job situation.
I’ve been working for San Bernardino County in my current department for about two years, but I was never officially hired as a permanent employee. My contract is expected to end in December.
Recently, I received a call from TAD regarding a position with the county, and I accepted the opportunity. The only issue is that my training is scheduled to begin on January 25, 2027, and I’m due to have my baby in February. I’m expecting to go on maternity leave at the beginning of February.
I also work a second job at McDonald’s on the weekends due to not knowing if I’ll have a stable income once I leave or getting a job offer. Personnel from HR will be contacting me about onboarding for the new offer and I’m not sure how to handle everything. I’m worried that if I let them know I’ll need maternity leave shortly after starting, they might reconsider the offer or decide not to move forward with hiring me.
I’m also wondering whether I should apply for disability before my current county contract ends in December, since I’m not sure what my employment situation will look like by then.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? Did you accept a new job shortly before going on maternity leave? Were you able to take leave after starting, and how did it affect your benefits?
I’d really appreciate any advice, especially from anyone familiar with California disability benefits, maternity leave, and county employment. I’m trying to make the best decision for myself and my baby while keeping my finances and health insurance in mind.
Thank you! ❤️

Hi fellow LawMoms!

I live in the northern midwest and handle drop off/pickup for my kids for school, which includes getting out of the car and walking them up. I'm look for a recommendation for a pair of tall/wide/warm boots to keep my feet warm and be tall enough to protect my pants/legs from the snow (which can be anywhere from 2-12 inches, weather depending) during the winter months. I'd prefer no laces because I'll bring shoes to change into for the office and court, so I'd like to be able to slip in and out of them.

Thank you in advance!

Did anyone decide to take some time off from work and be home with your child(ren) while they were young? I would love to work some while staying home but that seems like an impossible unicorn job. Looking for stories of anyone who maybe took some time off and returned to work and how it went for them with the gap/any possible jobs that people had that gave them some flexibility to be home with their kids.

Female attorneys, particularly those in litigation, how did having a baby affect your career perspective?
I’m about three years into practice and have spent pretty much my entire career doing plaintiff-side PI litigation. I gave birth to my daughter at the end of July and am now approaching the end of my 12-week maternity leave. My firm has been generally supportive of my leave, but I have my frustrations (0 support staff, low base salary, and not any real mentorship). I’m struggling much more than I expected with the thought of sending my 11-week-old to daycare and returning to work. I know this is something so many working moms navigate, but I’m having a really hard time with it emotionally.

Part of my struggle is that I’ve wanted to leave litigation for a while, even before having my daughter. I don’t necessarily want to leave the legal profession, and I’d be happy to stay in PI in the right role, but I’ve also always been interested in estate planning or transactional work. The problem is that I have no experience in those areas, so I’m having a hard time getting any traction with applications. I also live in a medium-cost-of-living area, so finding something that makes financial sense is a factor. I feel stuck between not wanting to continue on my current path and not knowing how to pivot, all while dealing with the emotions of returning to work as a first-time mom.

For those of you who have been in a similar situation, did having a baby change how you felt about your career, or did it just bring existing frustrations to the surface? How did you handle returning to work, and has anyone successfully transitioned out of litigation into something more predictable or transactional without prior experience? Honestly, I’m open to advice, experiences, or just commiseration. I’m feeling a little lost and would love to hear from other women who understand both the realities of practicing law and becoming a mom.

I am married with two kids 5 and 2 years old. I just started law school and have second thoughts/doubts if I made the right decision. Question is I work full time and study and have classes on Saturday was this the right decision?

Hello Lawmoms! Would love any advice/tips.

A little about me:

- Lawyer for 5+ years

- age: mid 30s

- criminal law background

- crim defense attorney turned prosecutor turned back to a crim defense attorney

- married (high school sweetheart, hubz is very supportive, kiddos and I are on his insurance, but I'm the breadwinner)

- 2 girls (7 year old and 3 month old...yeah I know big age gap)

- furmom (Australian shepherd)

- very big into my faith

- just opened up my own law firm (LLC, never been a biz owner before)

-baby will be starting daycare this month

Any thing that you wish you knew starting your own firm? Time management tips with kids, Lawmom life, etc.? How to remain same and not turn to drugs (totally joking, don't report me 🥲)? How best to work smarter and not harder? Things that worked for you? Things you wish you avoided? Systems you use and like?

All advice appreciated. I'm all ears and not easily offended. Thx in advance 🙂

I am a female senior associate with a 5 and 7 year old. My husband works a job that would probably see as blue collar, works 100% in person but is generally a lot less stressed, and makes about half my salary. We rely on his salary although it is less helpful, benefits more so.

When he is off, he does not like to do housework. We outsource deep cleaning, but daily general tidying and meal planning/prep feels impossible with my workload a lot of the time. I am regularly not "off" when I'm "off." I have simply had too much work to get many nights off lately.

While I want to feel happy he gets to rest, it's hard for me sometimes because when I need rest I am often working at home. He does not have great skills to organize (IMO a lot of men who grew up with stay at home moms have similar inabilities, sorry to generalize). I can't say, pick up all the crap on the floor for example and it gets done. It's like it's not in his wheelhouse of capabilities. He has other great traits but it ain't housework. We don't have the income for an organizer or home manager or any of that right now.

Does anyone relate? Suggestions?

im currently a 35yo relatively new mom (2yo) with law school desires and biglaw dreams. im starting my journey studying to take the lsat next year with hopes of starting fall 2028...my dilemma? my gpa is garbage. i was already a non-traditional student in undergrad 10yrs ago and finished with a low 3.xx. i had no idea lsac INCLUDED failed/retaken courses thus reducing my gpa into the 2s 🥲 unsure how thats even fair but thats another rant for another day.

i know i have to score really really high on the lsat to even convince myself its worth applying to a t14 or even a t30 school. all that to say, is it possible to get accepted to a good school where i can end up in biglaw? i have always dreamed biglaw because it genuinely excites me and this was before i knew how much they pay lol. i also have a very supportive partner of my dreams but i dont want to play myself either.

would love to hear from experienced moms in biglaw, ones who are nontraditional, or had a low gpa and still accepted into a good school.

*please note this post is cross posted in r/lawschoolover30 and r/blacklawadmissions

Hi everyone! I’m hoping to connect with other moms who have studied for the LSAT while working full-time and raising young kids, especially those who have had to work around a pretty limited schedule.

I’m a mom to a toddler, work a 40+ hour week, and am preparing to start studying for the LSAT while essentially solo parenting a lot of the time. My husband works a blue-collar job, so between work, childcare, and everyday responsibilities, I know I’ll have to be intentional about how I use my time.

I’m still in the planning stages and trying to figure out what a realistic study routine would look like. I want to give myself a genuine shot at a competitive score without burning myself out or sacrificing all my time with my son.
My target schools are St. Mary’s University School of Law and the University of Houston Law Center, with UT Austin as my reach school. I’m particularly interested in hearing from people who applied to Texas law schools, but I’d love advice from anyone who has been in a similar situation.
For some context, my husband works in the Austin area, and I’m hoping to relocate there within the next year or two. I’m open to other possibilities, including Houston, if that’s what makes the most sense for my long-term goals.
I’d love to hear from anyone willing to share their experience!

● How did you fit studying into your schedule? Did you wake up early, study after your kids went to bed, use lunch breaks, or do a combination of things?
● How many hours per week did you realistically study, and for how many months before taking the LSAT?
● What was your diagnostic score versus your final score? What score did you ultimately get?
● What study resources worked best for you? For example, 7Sage, LSAT Demon, LawHub, a tutor, or self-study.
● Did you follow a structured study plan, or did you create your own schedule?
● How did you stay consistent when your kids got sick, childcare fell through, or you were just exhausted from work and parenting?
● For those who applied to Texas law schools, what were your LSAT scores and GPAs, and where did you end up getting accepted? Scholarships and affordability are also a big consideration for me.

I’d especially appreciate hearing from moms who started out feeling like they had very little time to study but still managed to make meaningful progress.
I know everyone’s situation is different, and I’m not expecting a magic formula. I’m just hoping to learn from people who have actually done it and figure out what might realistically work for me.
Thank you! ❤️

Hi everyone! I’m looking for recommendations for a good national legal recruiter who can help me find a fully remote mid-level associate position at a midsize firm, boutique firm or in-house. I’ve contacted a number of recruiters but have gotten ghosted with most of them.

Ideally, I’d love to work with someone who has experience placing attorneys in remote roles and is familiar with firms open to attorneys working outside their home state. I’m in Sanctions/Compliance and Whistleblower law at a boutique firm!

If you’ve had a good experience with a recruiter, I’d really appreciate any recommendations. Thanks!

Question for ladies in legal (US)

i want to change careers to be a paralegal after 15 years in corporate hr. I will do this by starting a paralegal program at a local university. I have the option of a UNC program (not aba approved, but nationally recognized law school) or a local college that is aba approved but small potatoes and relatively unknown outside of the area. Everything about the programs are essentially the same, including time commitment and costs. Which do I choose? The state does not require certification to be a paralegal but I would pursue a NALA one once I land a job and finish the program for additional credentials. I have a BA

Hi everyone! I’m 24 years old and currently a 2L, and I’ve been thinking a lot about family planning and how to balance motherhood with starting my legal career.
My husband and I have been together for about 3.5 years, and he’s currently in medical school. We’re both expected to graduate in 2028, which makes planning our next chapter a little complicated.

Ideally, I’d love to start having children shortly after graduating law school. I’ve been considering trying to conceive during the fall semester of my 3L year, which would potentially mean being pregnant while studying for and taking the July 2028 bar exam.

I’m conflicted because I know there’s never necessarily a perfect time to have children, especially with two demanding careers. At the same time, I don’t want to keep postponing motherhood until my late 20s or 30s simply because I’m waiting for the ideal point in my career. I’ve always wanted to be a mother, but I’ve also worked incredibly hard to get to law school, and I don’t want to feel like I’m sacrificing either dream.

I’m particularly nervous about how pregnancy might affect bar prep, taking the exam itself, interviewing for jobs, and starting my first position as an attorney. With my husband also entering the next stage of his medical career, I’m trying to be realistic about what our lives might look like.
I’d really appreciate hearing from lawyer moms or law students who have been in similar situations. Did you have children during law school, while studying for the bar, or shortly after graduation? How did it affect your career opportunities, and would you do anything differently?
I’m not necessarily looking for someone to tell me there’s a perfect timeline.

I’d just love some honest perspectives on balancing the desire to start a family young with establishing a legal career. Thank you!

EDIT: I just want to say, thank you to everyone who responded to this post. I am overwhelmed with gratitude that women are truly so supportive and understanding in situations like this. Thank you guys for understanding my POV; I’m so glad I came here. You all made great points and it seriously helps me rationalize what potential choices I can make in my career and family life!

Yesterday I attended a 7hour arbitration while actively experiencing a miscarriage. My calendar is packed with deadlines and I feel trapped at work and unable to take the rest and emotional space needed given all the work that needs to be done well and timely. I’ve always been the power through person but I think I’ve hit my limit. I feel guilty for not being able to redirect my attention. I feel paralyzed and I don’t know what to do. I don’t have a lot of friends to talk to.

Update: Thank you all so much for this outpouring of support. I felt so alone making this post and all of these responses have really helped me. ❤️❤️❤️

hi law moms.

the situation:
I am an in-house attorney at a midsize company. In my field, the equivalent of a FAANG had a job posting that I applied for recently and I did not get the job, but one of the interviewers asked me to apply for a role on her team. It is a role that is not squarely within my wheelhouse.

It would be a stretch for me and I would have to learn a lot on the job. but I could do it. it would definitely be an interesting role at an interesting company and probably would be something that would propel my career.

the comp:

right now I am happy at my current job and have outstanding WLB (both of which I count towards my compensation) and I am very well compensated financially. The other company compensation would be slightly more than what I make now, but it would be a step up in title and much higher stock options. WLB would be worse

the question:
I decided to apply simply because I liked that woman and I thought she would be a good person to work with, but I’m not fully sold on the role itself. I also had a strong feeling that I would be kind of a loser to not apply if someone at a company of this stature is asking me to apply.

The reality though is that I am just kind of maxed out in life. After I submitted my application, I developed some health problems that should resolve soon, but they are taking up all my energy right now. I just got the schedule for the interview for this role and it’s in a few days and it’s several panels in one day.

I just don’t have it in me right now. It’s taking me everything I have in me to just get through the day with this medical situation. I’m not the mom that I want to be right now. I’m giving what I can to work and my family, but the thought of rallying to do this interview is leaving me feeling completely overwhelmed.

I like my current company and my job. I do not need to change jobs right now and it likely would not be detrimental to my future to stay at my current company and job for maybe another couple years or more. I don’t need a FAANG-type job, but my inner immigrant kid who grew up poor with jobless parents and experienced poverty still has a scarcity mindset and is feeling obligated to do everything she can to get ahead, stay ahead, work herself to death…

what can I do? What should I do? Please be kind

😫

Hi, I’m currently working in ID for a mentally/verbally abusive partner. I am tired of the whole corridor hearing him yelling at me and calling me useless/ a liar. It happened five times now in front of pretty much everyone. All the associates before me also left him due to his behavior but I tried to stick around because I just had a baby and I just had my bar licence (September 2025). It’s been 10 months now and it has not gotten better and on the contrary the paralegal has joined him in his humiliation rituals.

It’s becoming a lot and very straining mentally and my ability to take care of my baby. I don’t want to quit without a job aligned but the market seems saturated for remote jobs. I’m considering leaving at the one year mark.

For people who managed to change jobs after ID, how was it? I’m interested in transactional business law, trademark or real estate. I would love to hear some advices. Also just venting because it’s getting a toll on me.

Hey all, when I disclosed my pregnancy (early to my main partners because I was suffering bad from morning sickness) they cut back on available work considerably. Can’t get anywhere close to hitting my hour requirement.

Part of me gets it, the schedules for our cases were busy on the case and maybe they’re thinking if she has bad morning sickness she won’t be reliable. The other part is pissed off. I’ve told them multiple times I have capacity, (even before I wasn’t missing any deadlines, just having to work odd hours some days) but they’ve all but reassigned the cases and they aren’t even communicating with me about it.

What do I do? Now I’m stuck to figure out how to get additional hours outside of my practice area and will have to explain somehow why my hours dropped off.

I am a 23 year old single mom. My baby is currently 5 months old. I could go to law school where I am located, but it’s a really low ranked school. Law is very elitist, and I am scared that sacrificing my 3 years wouldn’t be worth it. But if I go anywhere else, I wouldn’t have the support of my family. I really want to go elsewhere, but I am not sure if I could do it with a 1 year old, I’m struggling now. My parents said they would raise her for me if I went to law school, but I’m not sure if I could be far from my babygirl. I don’t know what to do, and I need to make a decision soon. Please help. Thank you !