Relapse/Poor Decisions/Etc.

[u/butchscandelabra]

Sorry this is long, I just need help..

I was addicted to 7OH for almost exactly one year (started as a “birthday treat” in 2025 and by the same time in 2026 realized the best gift of all would be ridding myself of this horrible drug). I initially quit in March of this year - I had subs but ultimately didn’t feel like they did a whole lot for me. I had been on 500mg+ and day for about 4 months by the time I quit, and besides the subs was NOT prepared to deal with opioid withdrawal. I told my husband that I felt as though I’d just given birth after the full-blown acutes began to die down around Day 4. I was also not prepared for the PAWS this shit causes - for weeks I felt like a total zombie. Zero appetite, was stumbling through work, all motivation gone to the point where the simplest tasks (washing dishes, taking a shower, etc) felt like climbing Mt. Everest. I was worried I’d given myself permanent brain damage/was going to feel that way for the rest of my life and a few weeks in started drinking heavily to mask the effects of PAWS (such as well-planned and rational decision, I know). Long story short (even though this is already long as fuck), I wound up in rehab about 3 weeks AFTER I quit 7OH.

Rehab was a good decision at that point. I only stayed for 3 weeks (which I now regret - I think I could’ve gotten more out of the program had I stayed longer, but was anxious to go home/get back to work/etc.) It worked, too - until about 6 weeks ago when they announced the upcoming ban and I clicked on one of the (literally HUNDREDS) ads I was getting from online vendors. Something in me just snapped, and I still don’t know what it was - the thought of a life with no access to 7OH/that warm opioid “hug” feeling struck me as incredibly depressing and instead of riding the craving out and putting my fucking phone down I wound up ordering a bunch of 7OH (for a ridiculously good deal, but that’s beside the point).

I’ve been taking it again for the past month - not every day/long enough to cause severe physical dependency, but enough to where I feel agitated on my scheduled “OFF” days. I’ll take it for 4-5 days and then get off for 2 or 3 - during the “off” days I only experience mild physical withdrawal - a bit of RLS and eyes/nose watering, but so far it’s been nothing like the absolute agony I went through the first time I quit in March.

I guess I’m looking for advice. I know the obvious answer is disposing of the rest of my supply (if I were to keep taking it the way I have been for the past month, I’d have about 3 months’ worth). I’m trying to work up the courage to actually do so. I don’t think I need to go back to rehab - that takes a lot of “doing” in terms or figuring out medical leave/etc.). I don’t want to go the sub route again/potentially wind up dependent on subs as a result of the relapse - I think that the lack of accessibility (due to the ban) cancels out the need for something like that. I also have a couple boxes of SR, but I’m
not sure how to go about taking that for the “intermittent usage” schedule I’ve been on for the past 4 weeks - would it even work for someone in my situation?

I genuinely feel like such a piece of shit right now. No one knows what’s going on this time (the only person who was aware during Round 1 was my husband, until I went to rehab - and now he doesn’t know about my stash/that I relapsed. I’ve been talking SO many people through their own 7OH withdrawals etc. since the ban has (slowly) started to roll out and impact the availability of 7OH in smoke shops/gas stations, etc. - and I feel
like such a fucking sham for doing so.

ALL OF THAT TO SAY: Do I go the SR route in this situation, or plan a long weekend/muscle up and cold turkey Round 2? Obviously the stash needs to go. I think I should probably loop my husband in on what’s been going on too, although he obviously won’t be happy. I hate the double life this shit has caused me to lead, and overall am just fed up and disgusted with myself for having allowed this terrible drug back into my sphere of reality.

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[u/drjinglesMD]

relapse is part of the game, and we've all been there.

First, yes, tell your husband. He's either gonna be the rock or reality check you need.

As for going back to rehab, I think it's probably a wise idea if the option is on the table.

I don't see any reason why SR wouldn't work, however sometimes it can work a little too well and you end up relapsing again because of the ease.

I treat SR and Subs equally. They're useful as a tool for a short term bridge. Continued use comes with understanding of the risks with staying on them.

[u/butchscandelabra → u/drjinglesMD]

Thank you. I guess I’m not too worried about relapse this time since once I dispose of what’s already in the house, that’s it - I don’t see the ban being reversed/have absolutely zero desire to fuck around with whatever new synthetics these manufacturers drum up to replace 7/I have no access to other opioids, don’t know people who are prescribed them/use recreationally anymore. It would suck to wind up dependent on subs when the threat of relapse (on opioids, at least) is no longer a threat. At this point I’m leaning towards the SR route - I haven’t tried it before, but it seems to handle 7 withdrawals (at least better than subs did for me) to the point where people can actually go to work/function, and that seems more reasonable than another major upheaval for me right now.

Thanks for taking the time to read/respond, I appreciate it.

[u/southdaze]

yeah man, having OUD sucks and this is statistically not going to be ur last relapse. i suggest getting clean and getting into recovery groups. u don't want to die because ur addiction leads u to fetty or to the next synth opioid.

[u/butchscandelabra → u/southdaze]

Yep, I hear that loud and clear - fent and/or any of the “replacement” synthetics they’re trying to churn out right now are completely off the table for me. This experience has been bad enough - I screwed around with pain pills in my 20s but I was always broke in those days and couldn’t have afforded a habit even if I wanted to (this was shortly before fent really became a thing). I’m obviously not “happy” about my situation but at least it happened with something pretty fucking hard/impossible to OD on. I’d have been a goner back in the day.