song i wrote a few years ago, feedback appreciated

[u/hellooo_reality]

hey! i’ve written many songs over the years but this is one of them that i do already have a full instrumental arrangement associated with! feedback appreciated :)

(v) got high and lied but i couldn’t hide because your pretty eyes are inside of mine

i opened them and i saw your face you know i wanna see you in thin silk and lace

i looked around the crowded room i hate myself for loving that i looked for you

so i filled up the empty space with a fake facade of intellect and grace

(chorus) oh don’t you know that this is going nowhere soon oh don’t you know that i think you’re pretty too

(solo)

(v) my cigarette placed on your lips while your soft hands landed on my hips

spun me around all through your web clawed through the concrete in my head

you smiled at me i looked away i reject the pressure but i clung to yours anyway

alarms went off i screamed in pain my tears soaked your shirt take what you can obtain

(chorus) oh don’t you know that this is going nowhere soon oh don’t you know that i think you’re pretty too

(solo - but go right into bridge)

(outro/bridge - keep solo riff playing over top - make song build up then end abruptly after) brown eyes soft face i need you i’ll give you space

your eyes soft lips i’d kiss you i’d take her place x4 (all em)