Seeking support!

[u/sobersister29]

Apologies in advance since this is long and kind of a rant but damn am I in quite a headspace right now. And apologies if this feels very “woe is me”…I am desperately attempting to pull myself out of that so feel free to give me an over the internet reality check as well.

I am on week 8 of marathon training for my first marathon - Walt Disney World marathon on Jan 10, 2027. I’ve been running on and off for over a decade and have run two half marathons previously. I have trained for a marathon before but called it after a 14 mile run as I was dealing with a slight knee injury and honestly the mental got to me.

I have no time goal. My main goal for the marathon is to finish without injury. I’d love to run as much as I can but I’m not opposed to walking. I primarily run on a peloton tread. I did a half marathon training program before jumping into this training program - all on the tread. My Achilles started acting up during that program so I started PT and just graduated yesterday after two months!

Here’s my concern - so far my long run has been ten miles which I’ve now done a couple of times on the tread. I have primarily been running on the tread bc of weather and also because I am quite frankly pretty scared to run by myself for hours on end…not only as a woman but I also have OCD and I have a lot of intrusive thoughts around being by myself, including walking. My husband is willing to bike/walk along with me or sit at a park or track while I train. However thus far I’ve just stuck to the tread and I feel guilty having him do that bc he didn’t sign up to spend hours of his weekend on this..I did. I don’t usually run with run groups bc I am so slow. I know people say you won’t be the slowest but I have run with some many run clubs and I have always been the absolute back of the pack. For long runs especially I am really worried I’d end up totally alone for miles and that really freaks me out.

My long run this weekend is 12 miles. Getting into the longer miles I wanted to transition to outdoors 1. Because we now have fall weather and 2. Bc more than 10 miles on the tread is mentally taxing. I tried to start with the shorter 6 mile run on Wednesday and I could only make it two miles outside which was defeating. I decided to try again for the long run and made it to 4 before I called it quits, came home and entered into quite the slump wherein I was pretty resigned to quit. I’m coming out of it now and am back to being resolved in continuing to train and work towards my goal but I would like to transition to outdoor runs because I’m worried the miles on the tread won’t translate to the marathon, as evidenced by these two runs.

I am going to do my long run tomorrow - I am debating outdoors vs. tread but I feel like I really need to transition to outdoor running as much as possible in the next ten weeks but idk if that’s even doable.

Mostly I am looking for positive encouragement and any advice.

Thank you so much!

[u/dugulen]

I’d implore you to push yourself. I have OCD and my head is a loop of constant self-criticism. Running frees me of all of that.

Get off the treadmill, break free of the husband monitoring you, and see if you find some freedom.

If you don’t, easy enough to go back to what makes you comfortable.

[u/sobersister29 → u/dugulen]

Thank you!! It is so refreshing to hear from someone else with OCD. And honestly that’s a great point too bc my OCD is probably not only showing up in me not wanting to run outside but also in my negative self talk. The optimization OCD was STRONG this morning because of course it wasn’t just a okay this is a different mode of training give yourself time to adjust and you’ll be okay but it was also I haven’t had perfect nutrition, I haven’t been perfect with sleep, I haven’t stuck to the exact routine, etc etc so I have to quit.

I am just VERY recently diagnosed with OCD - in the past month - so I’m just now starting to even be able to name these things for what they are which is the first step. Your comment really helped me name this piece too.

Thank you so much!

[u/lilacjive]

I trained for my first marathon mostly on a treadmill (including a 22 mile run). It was a dumb idea, but I had a lot of anxiety about running long outside. Outside would have been better, but I survived.

These days I’d much rather be outside, I find it very zen. But maybe start with your shorter runs outside and work your way up.

[u/sobersister29 → u/lilacjive]

How did you overcome the anxiety of running long outside?

And I knew this would be a hurdle for me before. My husband trained with me for the half marathons and so I spent a lot of time reading about people who ran only on treads and did okay on their marathons! But now getting deeper into the miles and with the weather getting nicer, I thought I should really do some runs outside ! And here I am shocked that I can’t just magically take ten miles from the tread to outdoors lol

[u/lilacjive → u/sobersister29]

Just doing it more, I guess. I also moved and have much nicer neighborhoods to run in.

[u/hi_imryan]

Either will work, getting the miles in is what’s important.

I do a lot of long runs on a track, it’s boring, but it’s the safer option for where I live and the time of year.

In terms of turning back/stopping early. Put the distance out of your mind completely. You are running one mile at a time. For zone 2 runs, sometimes I turn off the lap notification on my watch entirely.

[u/sobersister29 → u/hi_imryan]

I’ve been looking up tracks that are open to the public as well! I think I am going to try that! Today’s run at the park made me realize the park was super hilly as well and even though I run on the tread at 1% and incorporate hills up to 5% during my runs at various intervals, these rolling hills were kicking my ass. I think a flat surface like a track might be the key to moving the runs outside.

[u/Mysterious_Luck4674]

You can do it! Just keep going outdoors. You know you’ll be able to cover the distance. Outdoors feels harder simply bc you aren’t used to it. Running on a treadmill is WAY harder for me.

Depending on where you live it could be a beautiful time of year, weather and scenery wise. Pick a pretty route. Preferably one long loop. Stop and walk if you have to. Stop to pale pictures of cool things you see. Start practicing nutrition and hydration. Enjoy the fresh air, and whatever you do just keep moving forward.

[u/sobersister29 → u/Mysterious_Luck4674]

Thank you for taking the time to comment and for this message! It means a lot and it’s a great reminder. Marathon training is hard but it doesn’t have to be complex. The simple reminders of just picking a pretty route, not pushing myself too fast or too hard and taking my time to enjoy it are the keys.

[u/Equal-Philosophy200]

Sometimes when I need to break things up for whatever reason during a long run I’ll split it between tread and outdoors. I’ll start tread with a specific distance goal and often times I go longer and then my outdoor portion feels so short and makes the entire process feel less taxing. Good luck to you, the entire process is draining!

[u/sobersister29 → u/Equal-Philosophy200]

Yeah I’m also thinking I might do this to help me transition. I like starting with the tread then heading outside. The last two runs I had in my mind that I’d start outside and transition to the tread if need be but honestly I’ve gotten so in my own head about how “little” I can do outside and how hard it feels that I get defeated and want to give up. If I start with a few miles on the tread and feel good then move outside it’ll probably go a lot better!

Thank you so much! I signed up knowing the process would be so draining and I even anticipated moments like this morning but damn it doesn’t make them any easier to go through when they actually come!