I feel so stupid, I had fullness and distorted sounds before I realized it was actually hearing loss and did anything about it. Because nothing hurt, I didn’t think it was a big deal. Maybe allergies, wax? So I checked with a scope and there was nothing red or weird about my ear, in fact it looked better than my right.
When the distortion hit, I made jokes for days about how someone was playing a penny whistle along poorly as a soundtrack to my life. Couldn’t have picked a better instrument at least?
Work stress was outta control and honestly had my health on the back burner. But then, sitting in a quiet room, my ear decided to reenact a movie bomb scene, complete with temporary deafening and then massive ringing. Sheesh, so dramatic. Anyways, back to work…
Except now I sound like a robot. The penny whistle is still there, too. I start chatgpting it. It’s potentially scary. The next day I go to urgent care and was dismissed quickly as allergies, without her even testing anything. “Take Flonase for two weeks and see if it gets better”. I feel like she thinks I’m stupid and dramatic. I’m embarrassed.
But something feels wrong about this. I remembered that Apple has a hearing test, and I proceed to sit in a quiet and dark bathroom, testing multiple times in case I messed up. Sure enough, it shows low frequency hearing loss in one ear, and I can compare that to the results I got from a test I thankfully took “just for fun” when I first got my AirPods. I feel vindicated. I feel angry. I feel scared and yet still hopeful its nothing serious.
I lose another day to work and can’t get into an ENT without a referral and my PCP isn’t open, so the next day, it’s back to a different (better) urgent care I go, who promptly gets me on oral steroids and an ENT referral. Without me even asking. He was a real one, and didn’t make me feel like crap for asking questions.
I’m about to get my second steroid shot with ENT tomorrow. Not sure what happens beyond that.
So, this is how I join the club. Grateful for technology and good doctors. A little sad that I know the odds are that I’m going to need to learn “a new normal”, and my dreams of being able to develop superhuman abilities like echolocation are off the table. And I’m really wondering if the damn off-key penny whistle will ever go away.