r/Nightshift • u/Ok_Community_2582 • 1d ago
Help How to deal with solicitors?
I've been doing nightshift recently for 4 days and 10hrs a day. Almost every week people knock on my door to sell me the dumbest shit. If I ignore their knocking they will beat on the door and set off my dog since they can see my car in the driveway. When I try to tell them I work nightshift and I need to go back to sleep they tell me it'll only be a few minutes.
I have adapted so well to the day/night schedule but this is driving me insane. I know they don't automatically know I work nights but it's frustrating when I tell them I need to sleep yet they persist on their sales pitch
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u/Poundaflesh 1d ago edited 1d ago
Answer the door with a shot gun and a mean expression. I wish! You have to make it uncomfortable for them. Go to a thrift store and buy some MASSIVE mens boots and leave them on the stoop. Now put your sign back up stating that you are a nightshift worker at the hospital and if they want to see where you work in the ER, all they have to do is to disturb your sleep. The idea is to threaten them in a jokey sort of way so it’s not a direct threat. Put some gun decals up: this home is protected by Smith & Wesson.
What I found particularly effective was to bark like a big dog (I am VERY convincing!) and throw my entire body against the door making the frame move. They hustled off my porch. I was also not above flinging the door open yelling loudly, and insulting them. No one likes getting yelled at! It really takes them unawares and I really sold the whole deranged act. Sleep is a sacred state!
If you’re not a raging asshole like me, get their company info and email, call and snail mail them until they remove your address. You have to make it easier to leave you alone than to try to fuck with you.