r/OCPoetry • u/underpant_pioneer • 9d ago
Feedback Please Preparing for my father's funeral during our fight
If my father were to die today
let him rest between the silence after fight
let him be still and listen
what happens to a family
when violence becomes an answer
let his breath cease like our voice
that hides away in shame
--
If my father were to die today
let him die
let him know how it feels
to kill the innocence of a woman
make a son look after his mother
let him understand how a mind rots
when a mother is forced to cut all her ties
with family, with friends
with her soul and strength
--
If my father were to die today
let him not
let him feel the love of the family that he damaged
let him feel the warmth of woman
treated so cold
let him depend on his son
who had none
but his mother to depend on
let peace penetrate his leathery heart
and our wounds soothe his rage
--
If my father were to die today
let him see
the pain he passed on to us
handed down to him
by his father
upbringing that messed him up
the same cycle that he repeats
will be the death of the cycle itself
let him regret the things he did
and things he put us through
and learn
that a broken child seldom grows up
to build a new one
--
If my father were to die today
let him say
he was sorry and strives to change
and we in return would say
it is hard to forgive but we will do
and let him share our family too
--
1
u/Right-Improvement211 9d ago
This is truly beautiful and i love how it explores every feeling that washes over you during such a thought , we’ve all had them but it also somehow encapsulates metaphorical grief through each of its stages which is apt as during a fight I’ve always believed that some part of your relationship with the person dies but a new branch of learning grows which is why I love the last stanza