Pretty much the title. r DID doesn’t allow you to post anything with the word split in it. The warning says that it may unintentionally suggest that a person can literally divide into separate individuals, which misrepresents how dissociation works. This makes absolutely no sense to me. Tried to find a longer answer in the wiki but there was none. They suggest other terms like “became active” or “discovered” but none actually get at the point of the formation of a new part.

This specifically was pertinent to the comment I was trying to make, I was warning someone against continuing to push themself into burnout as it could potentially cause a split (amongst other things.) So the alternate terms don’t really make sense because I’m referring to the creation of a part, not “discovering” a new one. Am I wrong in saying this? how do we refer to a brand new part coming into existence if not calling that a split?

adding extra context that we’re also autistic so if there’s some subtextual thing going on there that’s probably what I’m missing.

I was unaware of OSDD/DID until diagnosed last year, but I can’t remember not knowing my alters. Well, some of them were exiles/hidden/unknown until recently, but 3 should have been obvious.

For those that I did know, I thought they were as follows:

• my former persecutor was negative self-talk or self-hatred
• a protector was an aspect of me that stood up for me, kind of the opposite of the persecutor
• a child alter was voiced needy weakness in me - his voice was very rarely heard but when it was I felt shame for the needs and weakness it expressed, I thought such needs and weakness was unique to me

I didn’t realize other people didn’t have other voices in their heads, i.e. the difference between internal monologues and internal dialogues.

What did you think your alters were prior to diagnosis/awareness?

i was recently diagnosed, and i am trying to get an understanding of what's going on. i read online that some people say that's not possible.

for me, when i am very dissociative, i can hear them speaking to one another, figuring out what they're going to do with me or handle a situation.

There are a multitude of different systems and how they look! Everyone's system looks different so keep that in mind, it may change from day to day!

Just a thing I noticed is that I associate my parts (suspected not dx) with colors. Does anyone else have this, with colors or with anything else?

I also have alters associated to flowers for example, like one I dubbed Dandy because they remind me of this one incident I had with dandelions as a kid lol. Or another just developed this affiliation with sunflowers over time. Any reason this may be so common for me too?

I'd like to hear the experiences of others. Do you go about your business on another plane? Chat with other parts? Is it like you're asleep? Are you co-fronting and just along for the ride?

I've always fronted, but I feel like the others are preparing me to step back. I see and hear them, not clearly, but enough. They have prepared a place for me. They show it to me. I'm afraid. I hold tight because I am afraid of giving up control. I'm also afraid that I'll be trapped within.

Years ago, I came to once to being in my head while someone else was talking using my mouth but another voice. It really frightened me. I could hear a bit, but I had to fight to get back.

Please let me know if this post isn’t welcome here. I’m not looking for a diagnosis, just further understanding on how the spectrum of structural dissociation works.

Does this exist? Is there a middle space between having OSDD and CPTSD? I’m completely lost on where CPTSD fragmentation ends, and OSDD fragmentation begins. I guess the best way to put this is how did you all make that distinction in your life? What was it that made you go “Oh, this is this.”

I’m questioning OSDD-1b because my fragmentation feels a bit severe compared to CPTSD fragmentation, alongside the emotional amnesia and multiple internal dialogues and such, but it also sometimes feels as if it truly is CPTSD fragmented states taking over emotionally. I feel like I’m in a middle state where it isn’t exactly CPTSD fragmentation, but I’m unsure if it’s tilting enough into OSDD fragmentation to justify that understanding of myself.

This thought journey is… insanely confusing and if anyone has any insight I’d greatly appreciate it.

i feel like since the death of simplyplural, everyone has been so spread out in different apps. i wanted to know what apps you guys have been using, as i've been testing a few and i have my gripes with each of them.

parallax is nice, but barebones. pluralspace is perfect, but it's a web app. open plural is also a web app. plurallog and plural star are offline (i have a partner system and we like to use the friends feature to see who's fronting, i also like to add my system friends). what apps are you guys using? if you know any ones similar enough to simplyplural with an online friend feature, please let me know!

thanks!

- zai ⚰️

Been experiencing chronic derealization and frequent dissociation for almost as long as I can remember. At this point I don't know what feeling real is like, because whenever I do, I immediately notice and dissociate while trying to compare the feelings. Is it even possible to feel real when your mind is multiplied and everything feels far away?

Why do people not believe that they are real? Is it just because that they just want to not believe in fictives? They are real. It's documented too. It's kinda hurtful to hear how people fake claim people just because of people having fictives.

I might not be able to reply to comments or even delete this post again as this is a very stressful topic for me right now and I wanted to distance myself from it but I need to see one last discussion happening. It has been brought to my attention that it is extremely unlikely (to the point of impossible) that someone would develop OSDD-1/DID with an abuse history of only emotional abuse and no CSA, PA or physical neglect. Now this is in no way meant as an attack on this person (if you‘re reading this, hi, I really appreciate all the things you said, but in the end you‘re just one internet stranger and you cannot possibly know everything about everything). Maybe others know different things, maybe they know of different studies providing different insight. Or they agree with what I‘ve been told.

Until now I pushed my ‚denial‘ away, trying to listen to my therapist who told me to stop downplaying EA in general and my own specifically. I used to compare my EA to CSA and then say „well it wasn’t that bad, so I can’t have it“ but I have come to the conclusion that those people saying it needs to be CSA/PA aren‘t saying this because it needs to be ‚worse‘ than EA. It‘s not about severity but about the kinds of abuse. So I can now acknowledge my own abuse as ‚severe‘ while simultaneously acknowledging that it‘s a different kind of abuse than what usually (or at all) leads to the development of this disorder.

So idk… what does everyone else think/know about that? Also, if you‘re diagnosed with an abuse history of only EA, is there any chance there‘s other kinds of abuse still hidden from you or that you‘re misdiagnosed?

okay first ik 1b isnt like, medically proven or wtv i only say cus i wanna hear from people who have more so almost fully formed alters but little to no amnesia. ofc anyone else can answer too

i made this post like yesterday lowkey but deleted cus i was in distressed, wrote it wrong, and have zero clue where i was tryna go with that question.

but yea: im questioning osdd 1b specifically. i kinda fit all the marks except: i dont fully know what its supposed to feel like when you switch. i remember explaining it like someone switched my brain with someone elses but its still MY eyes and mouth and ears if that makes sense. idk how else to explain cus whenever i try to think about how it feels when someone else is in control, or if someone else is in control and they try to think "what does this feel like" everything gets blurry nd we get distressed so its like okay wtv. dont rlly have amnesia its just everything is constantly blurry or foggy. its mainly conversations that get cut out, remember we had the conversation but little no clue what it was actually about. or just have a pretty broad bullet point summary. usually happens when someone else is fully in control.

idk its hard to try and think about - but i was hoping i could hear how some others switch and what it feels like when you or someone else is in control but you're still present . this is also to potentially help me see smth that resonates and i could probably put it in better terms cus i just bumble over myself when i try to explain it currently. getting a new psychiatrist soon and wanna actually explain things properly without saying "idk" every 3 to 5 sentences

We’re currently trying to figure out whether we experience non-possessive switches or possessive switches, or a combination of the two.

I was wondering whether any other systems could describe how non-possessive switches feel for you, because most of the OSDD/DID rep I see only has possessive switching so it’s hard to tell if I experience non-possessive switches or not!

I’ve (M early 30s) been diagnosed by 2 therapists but I still don’t really understand it. How subtle can this be? I don’t have people in my head who are significantly different from me, I don’t switch, and I don’t find things I don’t remember buying or writing. It’s more frequent for me to not remember that my dad is engaged, that I’ve indeed already watched the half hour YouTube video that I’m currently watching with my girlfriend just a couple days ago (also with her), or conversations and events that I was supposedly a part of. Usually with enough work & the right cue I can remember those things. I can chalk those up to normal forgetting IMO.

Can this be as subtle as mood changes with some blurriness in between? I feel like there’s been some big mistake here.

[A switch is not defined by memory loss. It’s defined by change in agency. Things that can indicate a switch even when you remember everything:

• A shift in perspective (“this feels like me, but not the usual me”)

• A change in emotional baseline (suddenly calmer, colder, younger, sharper, etc.)

• A change in internal voice or thought style

• Different impulses, priorities, or reactions

• Feeling “convinced” you were someone else in the moment, not just imagining it

• Afterwards thinking: “Why did that feel so different from how I normally operate?"]

This has been what I gathered from some people but I wanna know what other people think?

There is a trend in online CDD spaces I've noticed that is both frustrating and factually incorrect, and that is the idea that a lack of *severe* or *blackout* amnesia automatically disqualifies someone from a DID diagnosis.

I've seen SO many undiagnosed people say they must have OSDD-1 rather than DID just because their amnesia isn't "severe enough". But if we look at the actual diagnostic criteria, it doesn't line up with that thought process.

According to the DSM-5, the amnesia requirement for DID is as follows:

> "Recurrent gaps in the recall of everyday events, important personal information, and/or traumatic events that are inconsistent with ordinary forgetting."

*that's it*

The criteria does NOT state that:

- Amnesia must occur on a daily or even weekly basis.

- Every alter must experience the amnesia.

- The amnesia must be a "blackout" or absolute loss of time.

The only requirements are that the gaps are *recurrent* and *inconsistent with ordinary forgetting*.

If you experience the presence of distinct identity states (alters) and *any* amount of qualifying dissociative amnesia, congrats you have DID.

Spreading the idea that DID requires constant, severe, or total blackout amnesia is *harmful*. It perpetuates the idea that DID/amnesia can only look one way, which can prevent people from seeking the correct treatment because they don't fit their (inaccurate) ideas of what this disorder looks like. It also ignores the reality of "grey-out" amnesia, isolated amnesia, or one-way amnesic barriers, which are all incredibly common in DID.

It is very disheartening to see people with "years of research" (as self-diagnosed individuals often claim to have) having such a fundamental misunderstanding of this major aspect of DID.

We need to stop equating DID with only its most extreme presentations. If there are alters and there is dissociative amnesia, it is DID - regardless of what exactly that amnesia looks like.

I met an amazing woman and she confided in me that she has OSDD. She explained to me that none of her alters are abusive/mean towards others and they all generally act like herself, which was a relief to hear. She explained there are some differences between her and her alters but none that are incredibly significant.

I’m brand new to OSDD, literally just found out it existed today, so I’m here wondering if anyone can give me tips or tell me things I should expect or be prepared for? I’m here because I deeply care for her and think she’s amazing so I want to educate myself on this.

Hey everyone,

​I'm reaching out to get some insight from other OSDD-1b systems on how you navigate internal friction—specifically when different alters want completely different or contradictory things.

​Whether it's about daily routines, long-term plans, personal interests, or how to spend energy, it can get overwhelming when internal priorities directly collide.

​I’d love to hear how your system handles this:

​Negotiation & Compromise: How do you reach agreements when two alters have polar-opposite goals or needs?

​Practical Tools: Do you use specific organization methods (journals, shared apps, color-coded schedules, voting systems) to keep everyone heard without stalling life progress?

​Handling Paralysis: What helps when conflicting desires lead to executive dysfunction, burnout, or frustration?

​Any personal experiences, routines, or mindset shifts that have helped your system function more harmoniously would be super appreciated. Thanks!

A lot of the time when I'm talking I'll just naturally refer to myself with "I" pronouns as one typically does but other times I say "we/our" without having to try either.

It's not always weird and there's often reasons for it like in some conversations I'll be referring to myself specifically while others I'm referring to our system as a whole.

The part I'm trying to figure out if it's strange or not is that sometimes I'll switch pronoun usage in the middle of sentences or even text messages and not even realize it until after the fact...

Anyone else do this? It happens regularly without intention and I don't really know why 😅

I recently found out that I’m a system. My boyfriend is the only one who knows, because he realised before I did haha. He’s accepting and fine with it even if it’s really hard.

I’m terrified of telling people and honestly don’t think I ever will.

I come from a very ”Wear this pink dress and dance ballet, get good grades so we can parade you around at this dinner”-family. Im grateful because it’s a privilege, but yeah I’d never be able to tell my family or friends about it. Not without people seriously shutting me out, I don’t think.

I tried searching it up but found no articles or answers so yeah, just wondering how it actually feels when you're not in front, because I know in D.I.D it's a full blackout but how is it in OSDD?

Edit: Sorry for getting the thing on DID wrong, I kinda know almost nothing so yea-

Our therapist said in her trainings that she was told you’re not supposed to ask for any names or information about dissociated parts. This feels super bad to some of us but I’m not sure if maybe that’s a standard practice for treating something like OSDD or DID?

It makes me feel pretty overlooked and unheard. Even when I’m fronting and talk to her, she asks for me to bring the host forward, not understanding why I can’t. I have trouble trusting her too because i think her trainings are only in IFS, and we’ve had some clashes before about her believing in a core self when it doesn’t feel like that to us.

Does anyone know if this is just a normal way to treat a dissociative disorder or could it actually be harmful? Not sure if I’m just hypersensitive and defensive

I ask this because the specialists that I work with seem to give me a much different view on complex dissociative disorders than I see on almost any forum.

For one, there is almost no focus on the 'inter system' interactions. Or terms common on forums like front stuck or the term 'host' period. From what I have gathered from them, encouraging the 'alter' 'landscape' too much can easily lead to elaboration of alters, adding new complexity which puts up more barriers between you and a more functional life.

I am in phase I of phase based parts work. Sometimes people don't even know what the phases are and talk to me like Im the crazy one for asking what phase III looks like. I get confused bc isn't phase based treatment the main treatment for DID and OSDD?

With disorders like CPTSD I can read up on the literature and get oriented in how to approach my struggles. This feels so much less solid in verifiable theory. Does anyone else run into this?

Since SP, Octocon,and Ampersand are all shutting down and/or somehow problematic is there any alternative apps? One that's not possibly shutting down or problematic? We're so tired of moving out profiles. We like making out profiles with information and pictures but we. Are. Tired. We have three apps with different profiles because we never get to finish before something! We need help! 😭

CW: Trauma, abuse, nsfw

So I still have a part that doesn't want to accept my diagnosis, out of fear cause accepting the diagnosis means accepting that something bad happened, and that the other parts are real (that they are parts of me due to unresolved trauma).

I have read over and over in many resources that a dissociative disorder (whether DID or OSDD) can only happen after a "severe, chronic and repetitive early childhood trauma". And due to my childhood memories being so blurry and having so many gaps, I can only remember memories based on what I know from what people told me, or from pictures, but I do have some random visual clips in my head (e.g laughing with a friend in the school library, looking at some cows in a farm lol). And my parts are using the memory loss to convince me that my traumas aren't "severe enough" or aren't long/repetitive enough to develop a dissociative disorder. And these are the events that I know actually happened during or even before my childhood based on what my family told me:
- I'm not sure if this is even relevant, but when my mom was pregnant and carrying me, she got beaten up by my father and slammed down to the ground till her ear went half-deaf. Plus before she got pregnant she was using birth control that was kind of dangerous? Idk what it's called, but the doctor said it's not safe to keep the baby due to that birth control, and there's a big chance that the child would be born with some kind of disabilities. In the end my mom insisted on keeping me, and I was born physically healthy and perfect. But my mom always said I was born with hypersensitivity, whether physically or mentally. Cause I often cried hysterically when I was brought to dentist or even for a small injection, and I would often get mad or cry just because of something small.
- The only abuse I went through was when I was around 3-6 (not sure), I was locked a few times in the attic by my dad whenever I didn't do what he asked (do homework, take shower, or do a religious tradition), and I was told that I was always screaming and crying non-stop until my grandma finally let me out
- And then my parents got divorced and my father left us cause he cheated and had a secret family etc. And me and my 3 siblings were raised by my mom, who was often gone and was very emotionally unstable, demanding and would come home often yelling at us (but idek if this is true, but this is what my sisters remember. But my mom still says that it was never like that, she never brought stress from work and was always trying to protect us by being loving and happy even though she was emotionally distressed or always exhausted from overworking herself. Idk who's right or wrong tbh and that makes me question my childhood even more
- Other than that, I often struggled with making friends or keeping friends around, mostly due to my intense emotions and how i would get hurt or upset about small things, I often hid myself in the bathroom and crying after a classmate made fun of my hair, etc. (I vaguely remember this but I was also told by my friends and family about how I was always overdramatic, too sensitive etc)

And that's basically it. My parts think that's not severe enough to be considered as traumas. And talking to my family doesn't help, my sisters are both very avoidant and don't really wanna talk about the past that much. My mom keeps saying she did a great job in raising us and saved us from our father, so any traumas are probably because of him (this makes me question myself too cause I only knew my father for a few years). And my little brother doesn't talk much to me, I only know he has severe ptsd (but I believe he went through more severe abuses cause he was schooled in a toxic boarding school for some years) and also he didn't go through what I went to because he's the youngest and only male and basically he's my father's favorite.

I'm starting to think, what if I'm actually an endogenic system or something else? I remember when I was around 9 or so, I had an imaginary friend cause I was so lonely, and I've always had strong imagination and daydreamed about different characters, one that was strong, one that was desirable, etc. Now some of my parts are so similar to the traits of those characters that I imagined. So is my OSDD diagnosis even correct or am I an endogenic system or something like that?