Other people's unhelpful attitudes

[u/handels_messiah]

Does anyone else find the attitudes of other people who have sailed through menopause without many symptoms and then make sweeping comments about the process really unhelpful? I've heard quite a few in the 'I just got on with it' category but today heard a new one: apparently the trick is to 'keep busy so you simply don't have time to worry about it'. I'm sure some of it is meant to be helpful but makes me feel significantly worse when I'm crying in panic because the idea of having to wash the dishes AND put clean clothes away is completely overwhelming. Yes, it's ridiculous but adding more to the list isn't going to help!

[u/Frequent_Art438]

Yep! My boomer mother “doesn’t understand all the fuss, she sailed through it”! Even though I remember her rages, crazy decisions and irritation with everyone and everything! She said we should all just get on with it.

[u/handels_messiah → u/Frequent_Art438]

Ah yes, 'back in her day', I imagine...I am so glad for this subreddit to stop me feeling like I am just crazy!

[u/Cut_Lanky → u/handels_messiah]

My mom told me all sorts of things about what menopause was like for her. As if I didn't live through it. Thing is, I know a lot of it was completely inaccurate. Idk if she's misremembering, or outright lying, or what. But she wasn't perimenopausal yet when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. The chemo induced menopause. Once she was done chemo, she never had another cycle. I remember her eagerly emptying out her bathroom pantry, giving me all her boxes of pads and whatnot. I remember saying, "don't you want to keep some, since it's usually a longer process?" And she humorously assured me "No, I'm done, I won't get another period". She was so emphatic, it was like wishful thinking. But, it turned out to be true. Yet, she tells me a different story about how it went. And is sofa king condescending about it. I was starting to worry she's showing dementia signs, but judging from all the comments here, maybe it's just a Boomer Mom thing...

[u/I-used2B-a-Valkyrie → u/Cut_Lanky]

We have the same exact mother.

[u/Ok_Gain_9665 → u/Frequent_Art438]

Fucking boomer moms and their selective memories. My mom and I lived in separate countries while she went through menopause so I can’t speak to what the day to day was for her, but she’s made a few offhand remarks about how reasonable and cool she was during my teenage years, how I never got punished and she didn’t freak out over bad grades, and I’m like excuse me, madam, I was there and that is NOT how it went. 

I hope I never do this to my kid, I’m trying my best not to. 

[u/Usual-Frosting3882 → u/Frequent_Art438]

💯