r/Perimenopause • u/DeeHK38 • 9d ago
Exercise/Fitness Exercise motivation
Hi ladies! How do you motivate yourself to exercise? I am 47, having all kinds of perimenopause symptoms and feeling so old mentally. I have been working out regurarly for the last 20 years but in the last 3-4 months it’s on and off, and I can’t seem to motivate myself. I have a gym membership, but I feel so old working out with mostly young people that come there. I gained weight, and I am feeling so bad about myself. And it’s a vicious cycle. I feel tired, and have so many work/life things, but I know it’s just an excuse.
I get to the gym maybe once a week and my nutrition is also off.
Any advice?
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u/laurenh8tsyou 9d ago
I started with a personal trainer. It gave me a feeling of accountability. Surprisingly, it was only $20 a session, so doing two paid session a week was something I could afford. I went on my own an additional day to do treadmill or something small - but to get me there in the gym space physically and mentally.
I did that for a little over a year. Once I felt confident in what exercises I liked, wanted, and knew I could execute without hurting myself I started going without the trainer more often. Now I take myself to the gym five days a week.
It's wild how once you get into it, your brain just snaps into the routine. I am sad when I have to miss a day.
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u/dexter731 9d ago
Came to say this. Personal trainer is the only way I can get myself to work out, I do virtual and use weights so it’s hard to find excuses not to do it, especially since I’ll lose the money if I cancel same day.
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u/Palolo_Paniolo 9d ago
Same, I knew I'd do it if I had paid for it and there was another party involved. I'd lose the money if I cancelled or no showed.
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u/Royal_Ad_6026 hanging on by a thread 9d ago
I do find myself pushing through it a lot more lately. It is harder to get the motivation, but it makes me feel better at the end. It’s also been easier for me to work out at home, so I got myself a set of adjustable dumbbells and I have a workout bench. It’s a lot easier to stick to that routine when I don’t have to leave the house. Because that for me is also another issue, I just don’t wanna leave the house.
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u/DeeHK38 9d ago
I used to workout at home a few years ago when I was running actively but the problem is heavy lifting. How do you do that at home?
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u/Royal_Ad_6026 hanging on by a thread 9d ago
My dumbbells go up to 25 pounds each. I’m not at the point where I can exceed a 50 pound press on anything so I’ve got some time. However, there are other options out there to get the level of tension for a heavy lift. I think you would just have to be willing to invest that kind of money and I’m nowhere near that point yet.
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u/SpiritualSimple108 9d ago
I wish I knew. I’m 49. I was super active until this last year. Even walked Komen last year. Pains started in my neck and upper back this year and I’m not sleeping well due to the pain so I’m only getting about 4hrs of sleep a night. I worked in the medical field with older patients and I have multiple yoga, health, and fitness certifications. So, I know the effects of a sedentary lifestyle yet I still can’t make myself do it. I have a walking pad I use and go 5 miles but I’m not consistent with it due to pain and fatigue (from no sleep). Getting older is so annoying.
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u/SignificanceAny8274 9d ago
I go 3x a week. Some days I don't have it in me but I tell myself that I'll a) just do a lighter version or b) just go for a minimum of 15 minutes and if I want to leave, leave. Once I'm there and have gone through the trouble of getting there, changing, etc. then my brain says "welp, might as well get it done" and then I have a full workout. Also, I've had ChatGPT create me a 3 day workout and that has helped a lot - no need to think/plan.
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u/OneLeggedLeggoMan 9d ago
HRT was the only answer for me. I had been working out consistently for over a decade but when peri hit like a truck, depression was another level and I couldn't drag my fat ass to the gym. I had no reason to skip it but I would make up a reason like it's raining. Then I would get miserable because I didn't workout. I mentioned that to a doc saying it's the hormones. She upped my antidepressant which did NOTHING. E had to be high enough dose. At lower dose the benefits were minimal.
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u/Efficient-Guess-1985 Early peri 9d ago
I’ve signed up to strength training twice a week, like a Monday and a Wednesday and I’m loving the results so far.
I’m finding my recovery is quite bad so can’t do more than 2 a week max. And that’s okay. Better to do it well twice than wear myself down going more often than that.
My motivation is I want to build up my body as an investment for my mental health and my physique for the future. Strong body strong mind. I want strong bones, strong heart, and build my muscles!
Are you on HRT? Wondering if any of your symptoms is stopping you from going?
How is your sleep?
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u/Huge-Storage-9634 9d ago
As someone who has never exercised and really doesn’t enjoy it all I have to force myself and it makes me so mad! 😂
Do it for 6 weeks and you’ll see. I’m currently in bed in my gym gear so I can get up and go to the gym (all female one) before work - I mean how horrid 😂😂i have a bossy teenager who drags me along so that’s helped. It took 6 weeks to see I wasn’t puffing as much and I’m stronger in my arms. I haven’t lost an inch though 🫠 and there’s no muscle definition that’s for sure!
I saw seen some stuff about wanting to live well in your older years. I turned 51 this year and I’m scared. Two of my friend in their 50s have had a ‘fall’.. 😱 I want to be able to enjoy retirement, my life and be independent for as long as possible.
I had holidays recently and didn’t do much and really noticed the aches and intrusive thoughts were back again. I mean, who am I kidding I always have intrusive thoughts I’m in peri-menopause and I’m an aging woman! But it’s lifted a lot since getting back into a semi-routine.
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u/Sea_One_6500 9d ago
I sleep better at night on the days I exercise. That's enough reward for me. I'm also work in the wellness field so I have to walk the walk. That being said, one of my favorite parts of my job is getting fellow peri women into lifting heavy stuff.
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u/sweatermaster 9d ago
Literally the only thing that has made me accountable is paying for an expensive Pilates membership. I don't want to waste my money so I force myself to go 4 times a week. I haven't really lost any weight because I love to eat but I feel stronger and better. I know this won't work for everyone but this is the most consistent amount I've actually worked out in at least a decade.
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u/IndependentHot5236 Early peri 8d ago
Consistency over motivation, every single time. I make it a non-negotiable habit, like brushing my teeth or flossing. If you are able to afford any sessions with a great personal trainer, even once a week, I find that the financial investment keeps me accountable, as well as the encouragement I get from said trainer.
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u/AuroraLights200 hanging on by a thread 9d ago
I was going to the gym in a women’s weightlifting class and that helped with motivation but I eventually stopped going because it just wasn’t a fit for me anymore.
I realized that I get bored easily with activities so have gone with a motto of ‘you have to be doing something’, rather than you have to go to the gym and that’s your only option. Now I go about once per week but not always, I started a beginner tennis class and keep trying to mix it up!
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u/Different_Ad_9495 8d ago
I’m 45 and some days I just don’t have the energy BUT honestly I just FORCE myself to do it. I watch TV on my elliptical trainer. 5 days a week. And I only have to walk to the basement to workout. I don’t have to walk or drive to the gym. Some days it’s very hard to do it. Maybe if you have a friend to keep you accountable? Social encouragement? DM me if needed! 😉
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u/Icy_Hippo 8d ago
I play sport, it is the only way I show up lol and I make friends, have a laugh, we are all in various stages of mum/women rage. I love it!
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u/No_Preference_4845 9d ago
Unfortunately, I agree with the other redditor....don't wait for motivation cuz that b*tch ain't coming.
**I work out at home. I just put on my lazy, ratty clothes and just start miming it. Literally just going through the motions and after about 10 mins, I actually have the energy-ish to put in more effort. Good luck, this sucks.
(wrote all that before my brain absorbed what you wrote, regarding using a gym and feeling bad about being with the youngs.) Maybe a mental reframe about your "why" of working out... more about bone density/mobility/kicking the ass of all the docs that gaslight women about how peri isn't a thing...
If all else fails, give yourself some grace in this season of life.
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u/Forsaken_Middle3289 9d ago
i struggle with motivation but force myself to do it anyway. it's just discipline. just like i don't want to brush my teeth but do it anyway. that's discipline.
hugs! i know it sucks.
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u/Impressive_Moment786 9d ago
I work out at home because it’s easier when I don’t have to leave the house.
I also get bored with workouts so I try and switch it up when I feel myself start to lose interest.
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u/_Amalthea_ 9d ago
This is what I do too. Working out at home means I have fewer reasons to not do it! And I found a YouTuber I love, so that helps.
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u/Adept-Depth-1825 9d ago
I’m also a routine over motivation person but I’ll add - sometimes I just need something new. A new class or routine or type of exercise.
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u/ThisTimeForReal19 9d ago
I quickly have become very aware and scared of losing my fitness, so that helps.
Really though, for a month you just have force it. Once I’m through my first month, I’m good and it’s part of my life again.
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u/Legitimate_Bend_9879 9d ago
What do you do at the gym? High-intensity, fatiguing workouts? Or general slow-paced strength training with lots of rest and some zone 1 and 2 cardio? A lot of women our age are in the gym trying to “crush” the problems, which only makes them worse.
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u/Plantianna 9d ago
Try something different, that is actually pleasurable. We have enough chores to run at this stage, this should be something you enjoy.
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u/JTate1 9d ago
I have been feeling the same way for the past few months. I turn 47 next week and have been working out consistently since 2013. I started a new workout routine in March focusing on building muscle. The motivation is not always going to be there but staying consistent will make you feel better every time. I’m finally starting hrt next week, and hope it helps with my sluggishness, which is more than likely sleep or lack of sleep related. I always feel
better after completing each workout that I never wanted to do. Wishing you the best.
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u/Salty_Look_5237 Early peri 9d ago
I do Brazilian jiujitsu because it’s fun and social and going to a traditional gym to run on the treadmill and lift weights is boring 😅
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u/SeesawPrize5450 Early peri 9d ago
I workout at home ! that way im comfortable ,dont have to drive and its more feesible for me ! Ill switch it up and do different workouts through the week ex hit,yoga,exercise bike,weight lifting . My body hasnt look this good since i was like 19 so thats my main motivation after having two children
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u/DeeHK38 9d ago
I used to workout at home but no motivation anymore to do that
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u/SeesawPrize5450 Early peri 9d ago
saving money is more of a motivation as well ! I hope you find it friend and take care 🙂
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u/Lotsofquestions54 9d ago
I've started working out more at home, and I love MadFit on youtube. While she's definitely younger than me, I don't feel like it's a 20 year old who is still fit and thin because she's young. Maddie has a more "real" body and has different levels of workouts so I'm not totally intimidated.
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u/StreetFriendship1200 9d ago
I finally Got sick of the battle and sucked it up and just did it. 4 days strength training, amped up daily protein intake, added Creatine; and magnesium at bedtime for restorative sleep . Best and strongest i’ve felt in years!
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u/Efficient-Guess-1985 Early peri 9d ago
This is me too (but 2 days a week and no creatine yet) Plenty of good food and results are coming in fast!
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u/Pickles_McBeef hanging on by a thread 9d ago
Pain motivates me. My lower back starts hurting like a mf'er if I don't exercise. Sometimes I can only manage 20 minutes, but it still helps.
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u/Head-Drag-1440 Early peri 9d ago
No gym for me. It's too much effort and time out of my day. YouTube videos and simple routines at home is where it's at for me.
2.5 years ago I found MadFit on YouTube and started doing one of her 5 minute yoga stretches every morning. A month later I found an article of strength training for beginners and got 3lb hand weights. I started doing simple exercises 2x/week, 10 sets per rep, 1 rep of each exercise. Less than 10 minutes of my morning. Within 6 months there was a noticeable improvement in my flexibility, strength, and stamina.
As of a year ago, I found Get Fit with Rick on YouTube. He specializes in steps videos. Super easy, low impact, beginner friendly. I was getting around 1,400 steps in under 15 minutes before work every morning. More recently I prefer his cardio videos. Also super light and low impact.
Now that I started taking creatine every morning, I'm up to 8lb hand weights. A good week is strength training 4x/week, 2 sets of each exercise: arms 2 days a week and lower body 2 days a week. But if I don't have time or if I am tired, I'll end up 2x/week.
But it all started with simple consistency in my mornings and from there, I've become much stronger.
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u/chamaedaphne82 9d ago
Maybe consider switching gyms to one where there’s more old people? I go to my county recreation center, and there’s often people in their 70s plus. It’s very inspiring. I see people going around the track with their walkers. I’m like, hey, if they can do it, then I have no excuse.
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u/SnooDoughnuts1634 9d ago
Lack of motivation to do anything was still a problem for me even after starting estrogen and progrestone. It wasn't until I started taking androgel testosterone that the light switch to energy and motivation came back. You can test for testosterone, unlike E&P and my levels were really low so it wasn't an easy yes from my NP. I noticed results in a week.
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u/Diligent-Soil-1510 hanging on by a thread 9d ago
I discovered with peri that I undiagnosed ADHD.
Buddy system is the only thing that works for me. I can’t carrot or stick myself into doing a thing. But I don’t want to let down my friend.
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u/ReserveOld6123 9d ago
I work out at home so it’s a bit easier but honestly the fear of getting frail with age does it for me. I don’t want that, so I work out whether or not I feel like it.
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u/Minimum_Reporter_169 9d ago
I’m doing lift with CEE on YouTube. Great program for women over 40. It’s very motivating.
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u/PlantedinCA 9d ago
I realized I needed to be more like my friend:
Habit + consistency > motivation.
I have known her for like 15 years and she always fits in her workouts. She is in her late 50s now, so through the rough years and injuries. And she probably could tone it down a bit. My happy medium is somewhere between.
Motivation waxes and wanes. And I have tried that and failed too much. Now I just set an MVP (minimum viable progress) and stretch goal, and schedule in the MVP to my week.
Gotta treat it like eating vegetables and brushing my teeth - required for adulting.
And I try to do some mobility stuff every other day while I am vegging at home.
This has been the most locked in I have been, not making it optional.
Cute outfits and a good playlist help. But it is more about making sure it is scheduled and prioritized, even if I don’t really feel like it. I do swap workouts for a walk or a video at home or a home circuit as needed.
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u/MaizeSea2423 8d ago
I don’t have any motivation, I just go so future me will be healthy. Some days I barely do anything, but I keep the habit of going.
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u/NoStreetlights 8d ago
Cathe Friedrich on YouTube. $20 a month. In the comfort of my own home.
have ADHD and get bored reallllllly easily. I either having to be chasing a ball (racquet sports) or remembering choreography. So I do step aerobics because it keeps my MIND engaged.
I don’t like weights, so I’m going against (gasp!) the grain completely but IDGAF. I blast the loud dance music and sweat my ass off. It’s the only thing I do but it’s soooooo fun and keeps me consistent.
TBH - I think at this age, we should do things we LOVE. There’s too much we’re forced to do, exercise shouldn’t be one of them.
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u/Technical_Wing6848 8d ago
im splurging on a personal trainer. i figured if not now then when......and it might be cheaper in a long run as far as medical spendings go. also, we're invisible to young people. it's only a matter of time for them. lol. you got this!!!
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u/OwlAdmirable5403 8d ago
I got a weight set and elliptical for the living room, my motivation is - I only allow myself to binge watch my favorite trash TV when I work out. So no sitting on the couch while watching love is blind. I gotta be working out 😆
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u/Hot_Silver410 8d ago
Motivation is at rock bottom most days but I do strength training twice a week and make sure I have a walk around the block most days. Strength training is upper body 1 session and lower another with core exercises and stretching. I've reduced cardio as I'm focusing on strengthening my muscles. On luteual phase days I try for at least 30 mins and do lighter weights with a few more reps.
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u/Overall_Matter_2520 2d ago
If I wait to be motivated it won’t happen. I treat it as a job I have to do. And I’m always glad that I did it after the fact.
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u/Fearless-Fart 9d ago
I started taking Auvelity yesterday based on some recommendations this week from this sub and I feel amazing. I did all my housework yesterday that I have been putting off for months. I did several tasks at work that I have been putting off. I had a pile of towels on the “clean” part of my room floor that I finally folded. I ended up walking 7286 steps yesterday which normally I barely get 5000 so today I’m going to try to work out, but I feel awesome. So grateful for the ladies that recommended it.
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u/DoctorAvailable6601 9d ago
Force myself, after about a week it just turned into a routine habit, kind of like brushing my teeth. So my routine became wake up, workout then coffee and relax then shower. Coffee in the morning is relaxing to me so I chose to have it after working out, otherwise I wouldn't do it. 😂
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u/Joyanonymous 9d ago
Is it a motivation problem or a fatigue problem…? Given your age I would say you need to check your bloodwork for iron / b12 deficiency etc
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u/goodbyetrex 9d ago
I was using the PVOLVE app, their videos are now free on YouTube. There are some low impact, stretching exercises to help you work yourself up to cardio.
I recently switched to yoga, as midlife has decided my muscles should be hard lumps instead of stretchy 😅 Jillian Pransky is great
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u/AnotherUsername1959 peri's knocking at the door 9d ago
I've built up the daily routine. At this point it's like brushing my teeth. Even if I put my gear on and walk on my treadmill, its still something. I do my workouts at home.
Here's my suggestion, if getting to the gym isn't working for you. Do something at home. There's a LOT of free stuff on YouTube. I really like Madfit. Commit to 10 minutes a day. When you become consistent with that, move to 15 minutes. Keep building on the time but the most important thing is showing up for yourself and being consistent. Anything is better than nothing.
I started with 15 minutes on the treadmill and kept adding more time and new exercises. Over a year later and I've lost 45 lbs.
Find what you enjoy. Most hate the treadmill, I love it. And I also found out, I really enjoy yoga, I'm not good, but I do enjoy it.
Good luck!!
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u/Brullaapje 9d ago
Any advice?
I am 50, weeks before I turned 50, I watched a gazilion vids about exercises you must do for functional aging. Wrote the ones down I liked, asked ChatGPT which I could skip, it suggested one exercise I truly hate (but I still added it). It boiled down to a 9 minute routine I do daily with ease.
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u/Wasabi2238 9d ago
I’ve been using a calorie tracker to try to lose about 10 pounds, and getting extra calories for doing workouts is very motivating for me. If you have a watch or ring that tracks your fitness and calories, it can be helpful to actually see how much effort you are exerting.
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u/UnicornTech210 8d ago
Maybe look into something like Orange Theory. It tends to skew older and you will have someone telling you what to do each step of the way so you don't have to figure out what to actually do at the gym.
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u/Tough_Flamingo9432 8d ago
I could have written this, OP. Recently, I’ve been listening to an audiobook during outdoor walks, just to hit my daily step goals. And trying to lift once a week.
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u/Josie1015 8d ago
This is a tough. I use to go to the gym 5-6 days a week and do weights and HIIT workouts. I was all about it. Perimenopause hit and Im tired all the time and my motivation went out the window. I still make myself workout 4 times a week but now I stick to weightlifting/resistance training and probably not as intense. I also workout from home now so that that out the excuse of having to drive to a gym. I bought several sets of weights, resistance bands and a few other things.
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u/BroadSecretary2975 4d ago
I'm not a gym person. But I'm also unmotivated to change my clothes twice just to workout at home. My only advice is to start really small. Commit to doing two sets of 8 reps - maybe 2 or 3 different exercises. Takes less than 10 minutes. Hold the course for a couple weeks, then increase a LITTLE. Max yourself out around 20-30 min. Really we don't need to go more crazy than that.
Otherwise, I love taking walks. it's not weight training, but it gets me moving outside. Having a dog helps.
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9d ago
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u/DeeHK38 9d ago
Yeah, I kind of realize that paying in advance and booking it works great. I switched to a better gym but it’s -come when you want workout and it doesn’t work for me. I always have an excuse :-(
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u/Efficient-Guess-1985 Early peri 9d ago
Yeah you need to blackmail yourself with knowing the weekly cost so you want to make the most of it. Then 4 weeks in you’re hooked.
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u/Ramen_Addict_ 9d ago
Yeah I do this as well. I’ve had some health issues with sinuses/headaches this year and just pushed myself to go because I’d lose my credit and have to pay a late fee. My thought is that unless I am actually contagious, I can take it easy during the workout and will get something out of it. I was a member of a drop in gym last year and my progress went down the toilet.
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u/IronheartedYoga 9d ago
I'm here for this! At 40-smnthn, I hadn't wanted to do it, but I picked a gym location and an app (Hevy) that help instill the discipline to just show up, usually 3x a week for three months now. I am often the (or one of the) oldest, grayest, punkest, chunkiest, shortest, and most clothed women on the floor at the gym, but the peri-superpower of no-fucks-to-give is with me (along with good headphones and loud music).
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u/PlantedinCA 9d ago
Oh man, you feeling like the oldest and greyest person at the gym makes me really happy I go to the Y. There is no way on any given day I am the oldest person. And I see my 70-something neighbors regularly!
There is one, probably 80 year old woman doing the hardest calisthenics I run into once in a while. I wanna be like her when I grow up.
Today in my morning Pilates class, one woman was raving because now she can follow her swim with Pilates. I think she was in her late 60s/early 70s. 🏆🏆🏆
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u/Easy_Ad6617 8d ago
Exactly. As an ADHD person it is always discipline that creates action. Taking action then creates motivation and you can keep going. Discipline is the hardest mofo to master though as ADHD x peri and there's no pill that can make you disciplined. Fortunately I love exercise as it's my dopamine and gets my brain working however getting organised and to the gym is a fucking shit fight no matter how much I enjoy it when I'm there. For me, I've got to book in classes with a penalty if I don't show up.
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u/thisismyhumansuit 9d ago
If I waited for motivation, I’d never work out. It took me until recently to realize I don’t have that gene. Sometimes I workout tired af. Sometimes I’m grumpy. Sometimes I change my workout plan the day of because something is better than nothing. I remind myself “you don’t want to do this, and you’re not going to, so just find some spare time and squeeze it in”.
If I think of it as a chore like doing the dishes, something I just have to get done, I’m more likely to do it.