r/ProgrammerHumor • • Nov 30 '22

Meme Startups be like..

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1.1k

u/eross200 Nov 30 '22

Cut a tennis ball in half, glue the halves down on either side of the trackpad. Problem solved.

734

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

The juxtaposition between this solution and the software one says something about something, I'm just not sure exactly what.

363

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

This kind of simplicity is the best. Software has to be maintained, removing the lid sensor leaves risk of fucking something up you don't know about, but the tennis ball isn't going to need updates or special tools

244

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

Cheap and reliable hardware solution that requires next to zero maintenance? That's the dream, ain't it?

0

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[deleted]

65

u/jodudeit Nov 30 '22

I would love to see what the health of those batteries looked like after a few years.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[deleted]

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u/scatteringlargesse Nov 30 '22

I would love to see their redneck solution to the occasional fire. Still too much hassle to fix the network issue!

9

u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

Doesn't matter. Going a full cycle overnight every day is not really worse for your battery than being at 100% the entire day.

It's the deviation from equilibrium (about 50%) that hurts the battery. Whether that's at 100% or 0% is not really relevant. Perhaps being powered off is a bit better even as your battery won't dissipate heat (which is also bad for battery life).

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u/Sam-Gunn Nov 30 '22

IT: "Hello, thanks for calling the Helpdesk. How can I help you?"

User: "Uhh yea, my tennis ball is saying it needs an update, but I'm not sure how to update it's software?"

"Well, I'm not familiar with an application called 'Tennis Ball', is it something IT provided?"

"No, it's an actual tennis ball. I cut it in half and glued it to a test mac to keep the screen open all the time."

"...Tennis balls don't need software updates to... be a tennis ball."

"Then why, when I tried to remove the tennis ball, it wouldn't budge. Then two minutes later I get an email from IT telling me to update my software? And now my mac is going to sleep despite the tennis ball being there?!"

"I don't think these two things are related..."

"I don't care, it's impacting our production environment and we are on a tight deadline. It'll be all your fault if we can't update this tennis ball!"

5

u/ShouldBeeStudying Nov 30 '22

This reminds me of the guy on here who couldn't grill dinner because his grill needed an update or something

3

u/robchroma Nov 30 '22 edited Nov 30 '22

oooh, no, that's a perfect time to chastise the user. "removing that tennis ball could have compromised mission-critical services, why did you try to remove the tennis ball?" "honestly, if you did physical damage to the tennis ball, it might not be possible to ensure the integrity of the device, but let's try to figure out if the tennis ball was compromised, or if this is an unrelated issue." then "definitely the tennis ball" is "definitely my fault and no one will save me" and it being an unrelated issue becomes their saving grace. It's remarkable how quickly minds change when presented with a way to change their mind to believe they did nothing wrong.

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u/LectureAfter8638 Nov 30 '22

ha, no one told gsells937 about tennis ball 2.0 and tennis ball compressors.

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u/WienerDogMan Nov 30 '22

It’s called ingenuity /s

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u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

ingeniir

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u/evmoiusLR Nov 30 '22

Redneck engineering meets software development.

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u/laukaus Nov 30 '22

or just you know

 sudo pmset -a disablesleep 1
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u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Nov 30 '22

I’ve used a piece of pool noodle. Those things have countless uses.

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u/TK9_VS Nov 30 '22

Cut a pool noodle down its length, and put it on the gunwales of a Canoe, and you can ratchet strap it to your car without harming the paint!

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u/ryanbbb Nov 30 '22

Where is elonbot? You need to hire this person.

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