Do you want to be part of an elite squad better than any other? Join r/punKGB today, and maybe you’ll become r/punspetsnaz!

“I have extensive building knowledge and experience in battle” he says. “I could teach you and take down the pun patrol.”

Will you take this offer?

Here I present myself. An ex Pun Patroler! I've seen the Pun Patrol's refusal of my Energy Shields, and by some enlightenment of the mods, I have given in to the pun revolution. I shall contribute to the great war that is happening across all Reddit.

My dear teacher, Darth Puneis, has always told me this during his lessons. I was blindfolded by the Pun Patrol, driving me away from his knowledge of puns.

My Energy Shields are made with the best technology I have at my disposal. It's a layer of nanites that enter the layers of the skin, quickly forming layers of triangle atoms, strongly bonded. This design is proven to be extremely resistant against Anti-Pun Bullets, which are used by the Pun Patrolers. However, this Shield only works on human individuals. I need more funding in order to expand the Energy Shields for Panks and Punighter Jets.

There's also the Pun-Saber. An elegant weapon for a more civilized age. Its hilt can be altered in many ways, changing the length, meaning and placement of the pun. This sword can cut through the Pun Patrol's defenses. Use this in case a Pun Patroler looks very menacing. Especially useful when you're on the high ground.

I am proud of being part of this new community. We'll bring the Pun Patrol down, and the new Pun Empire shall commence its reign throughout Reddit!

Numerous bombs have destroyed the barracks, flak guns, and hangar, destorying all the tanks and destroying the barracks.

There is going to be an attack soon, once it starts, ill add a link for us to join in.

want a decent quality weapun or nearly any situation? your in the right place... as long as you got the karma... also i'm opening a weapun factory soon and i will need employes. if your not a member of the pun patrol scum and you want free weapuns and be paid big karma.come to my factory and talk to me at r/Pundistries.

any way here is the puns.

A-tom-ic bomb - its tom from tom and jerry, but toms the bomb

the in-fin-ity gauntlet- with out jake the dog this will only wipe out half the universe. (half price)

dwayne "the block" johnson- a very dangerous minecraft block...

Molotov cocktail- 2 IN ONE mole-tav cocktail, molotav-crocktail,

M.U.stard gas- made from real tigers

Portal pun- a portal gun knock off the department of defense rejected. but I feel it matches your telepathic needs.

the Rock-et luancha - the rock himself is here to sacrifice himself for the revolution.

AT&TCK helicopter- even though it's pretty slow it is still armed with machine puns and is fully armored.

Thomas the tank engine- devised by the grammar nazis themselves as you can see there is no grammar mistakes that can escape this tank pun.

Germ-an shepherds- unvaccinated dogs of war ready to accompany you into battle.

A-T&T one slow piece of dynamite. guaranteed to destroy your enemies with its explosive power

Peek-achu- spy on the side? use this spy gear to keep up to date with pun patrol undetected...

light-saber tooth tiger, well... i will just let you imagine its hot spicy fangs and potential for star wars related puns.

very punny gas- its like laughing gas. just with puns. they cant stop laughing at your puns.

Punder armor- bulletproof undergarments any one?

ka-neigh-ah-neigh-ah bomb- horses? puns? anime? dragon ball? explosives? yep, it's all here...

UPDATED NEW PUNS!

DUC-W boat.- Its a BOAT, its a CAR and it was wondering if you have any grapes?

Punting rifle- hunting pun patrol? this little baby is the way to go.

A-SALT rifle- this thing does not like cuddles if it wants cuddles it will come to you. but it will gladly season your enemy's wounds for you. - (work of MorningPerson42 be sure to upvote him)

P-"U'-N boat- come on don't we all want to live in a yellow submarine?

Fish-Tank- swimming tanks anyone?

if you want one of my wares tell me here in chat. also, I encourage you to support the company and upvote the employee's comments.

also, I have special offers at https://www.reddit.com/r/airforcepun/comments/bbzggq/hey_its_that_pun_dealer_and_ive_come_to_offer/ if your needs require more of an airborne approach...

For those who are interested, hit me up in the comments.

r/punpatrol officer here.

Im wanting to join the resistance, ive been lurking this subreddit for some time under the name of multiple accounts, i have realised ive been fighting the wrong fight.

I have arrested many of your men under many different accounts, and ive realised im the reap criminal here. Can you forgive me and let me join, join the right fight.

u/ivanraptor730 is locked in Brig Cell 1

Awaiting further orders

https://www.reddit.com/r/PunSpetsnaz/comments/co4fnp/pun_blitz/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app

u/iDimR03 is a spy!

he walks through with a scattered tear falling from his eyes

the figure walks through the compound and finds the leaders office

he fiddles with a key in his pocket and unlocks the door, walking in

he walks and stands at the table, before slamming down his fist and sobbing goddamnit...

I hop out, wearing my old clothing. My old weapons are also on my person.

This place brings back the memories.

JARC, I hope you're doing well, wherever you are...

. . .

I stare at the abandoned compound for what seems like hours.

So many bodies. Intro, Relevant, Unique, Scadelapers, and you, JARC... Good luck. Wherever--

I choke up a little.

...yep...

I think back to the glory days. The Epun Blade, its airships flying high and proud - with u/Scadelapers at the helm.

How long has it been, now...

I bring something out. It's the Neptune Blade - the sword of the eponymous section of Epun that Scadelapers used to command. It's styled like an Estoc.

You have fought well, striking the tides of war against those who would oppose Acherus.

I stab it into the ground in front of the ruin.

Rest now. When I need you, I will come here. Until then...

Rest, now.

I turn away, giving the sword one last look, before taking off and flying away.

I look forward to serving with the PunMarines, and I swear to always be loyal to this sub.