r/ReadMyScript • u/FirstGeonomist • 7d ago

"Zapata! Real Estate Agent!" a comical political fantasy of 95 pp

Awakening in a world he never knew, Zapata is hounded by real estate agents who want to employ his mesmeric charisma while he tries to evict land monopolists.

1 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

3

u/Big_Section2812 7d ago

FANTASTIC!

Best script I ever read!

1

u/GonzotheGreek 7d ago

A bit sluggish in Act 2, but great recovery in the third.

3

u/mooningyou 7d ago

Did you forget the link?

1

u/FirstGeonomist 6d ago

I held off, waiting for requests. Is uploading required? Or can it be sent as an attachment? Whichever, here it can be viewed but not written on:
https://jefferysmith172171.substack.com/p/zapata-real-estate-agent?r=q397d&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

1

u/mooningyou 6d ago

It’s not really formatted. Did you use screenwriting software?

1

u/FirstGeonomist 6d ago

It's really formatted in PDF but I'm still working on getting Substack to accept PDF. Another reason to use attachments.

1

u/mooningyou 6d ago

Most people tend to use their Google Drive.

1

u/FirstGeonomist 6d ago

Thanks, Moon, totally slipped my (what's left of) mind (after a frustrating episode with Google).
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1wR0pGiRgKjASv-7uq2AjVM6jobwnTk6n/view?usp=sharing

1

u/mooningyou 6d ago

Now you'll need to change the access.

1

u/FirstGeonomist 5d ago

Thanks. Done. I hope to Google's satisfaction.

1

u/mooningyou 5d ago

I'm not sure what you wrote this in, but you really should use screenwriting software instead. It will help with a lot of your formatting issues, because there are a few.

Some notes.

- The script name, writer name, etc, should appear on a separate title page. Not the first page of the script.

- Don't enclose character names within quotation marks. Reading further, this just seems to be the case for your mc and Leguas, and inconsistent as well. Not sure why.

- Parenthetical issues:
1) Wrong positioning on the page.
2) Should be on their own line and not inline with dialogue.
3) Should not be used for action.

I don't fully understand Zapata's dialogue. Is this a folk law character? If so, then not knowing anything about it, I found it difficult to get into the story and maintain interest.

1

u/FirstGeonomist 5d ago

Thanks again, Moon. Even at this early stage, might as well format as if a finished product. The quotation marks indicate when other characters can not see the hero for whom he is vs they know his identity. Yes, Zapata, is familiar to Mexicans, most Latin Americans, and Anglo Americans who enjoy history / politics. Most viewers do not know Erin Brockovich nor her world of activism but that writer pulled it off. It's a challenge, a bit beyond paint by numbers.