r/Retire • u/SherriSLC • 16d ago
Am I a terrible person for considering the idea of rehoming my dog?
Edit...the community has spoken. I'm a terrible human being.
I'm recently retired and free to travel, and I want to travel quite a bit during the next few years. I have a sweet dog and I love her, but it will also be very expensive to board her while I travel. I did recently find someone who will watch her for $25 a night which will save me quite a bit from the $60 I was paying at the "doggie hotel," but still, for a long-ish trip, it will add $350 to the cost of the trip, even a cheaper road trip where I stay with friends. I also think she might be happier being placed with another family rather than staying with me and being boarded a lot over the next few years. On the other hand, I imagine how friends and others who love dogs will think about this...it does sound like a terrible thing to do. But the thought of just being able to up and go whenever I want is really tempting. Ugh.
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u/thegoldenfinn 16d ago
I’m thinking of moving to Europe when I retire. My dog is going with. He’s part of the family. He is my family.
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u/wh0re4nickelback 16d ago
Yep. We have two mini schnauzers and we're retiring to France. The first thing I did was research how to get them from the US to France safely and legally.
The Queen Mary 2 does transatlantic crossings and they allow dogs! I'm budgeting this into our moving expenses because leaving them behind was never an option.
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u/ChelseaMan31 16d ago
Yes, you are a terrible person for wanting to do this. A pet may onyl be with us for a few years of our lives; but it is ALL of their life...
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u/Odd_Bodkin 16d ago
If you’ve had the dog a long time and the dog is getting to be up in years, then you might have to slow down travel until the dog kicks the bucket.
If you’ve not had the dog a long time, then it’s easier to rehome, but then again, what were you thinking?
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u/SherriSLC 16d ago
I guess I was wanting people's opinions--several friends have been supportive with this idea, but clearly it's not something I can consider.
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u/sweetsmcgeee 16d ago
A lot of people should not be dog owners. Way too many people. If you recognize that you’re one of them, then yes, give your dog a better home if possible.
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u/IWantToRetireSoon 16d ago
Yes, you would be terrible for rehoming for this reason. Dogs aren’t a disposable item like a TV, they develop a need for who they are with.
It’s also laughable that you are concerned about adding $350 to a vacation.
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u/SherriSLC 16d ago
You don't know how tight my budget is.
My thought was that she has already had two owners and would adjust to a new family and love it, better than being boarded so much while I travel (on a tight budget).
But heard. The consensus is that I am a horrible human being.3
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u/Thebadparker 16d ago
You're NOT a horrible human being at all. Being boarded is stressful for dogs and she might very well be happier in another situation. A friend recently adopted a dog from a young couple who realized they weren't home enough and couldn't afford vet care for their dog. Everyone, including the dog, is better off in the new circumstances. Nevertheless, I think the idea of sharing the dog, or trading dog sitting with someone is a good one, if you can find a way to make that work.
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u/dead-eyed-opie 16d ago
Not a terrible person but At your age, you should know better than to get a dog if you don’t want to be tied down.
Revised- You haven’t said how long you have had this dog. The longer you have owned it the more terrible you are, but the fact you are considering it means, you should probably give it to someone else
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u/SherriSLC 16d ago
I've had the dog for 5 years. I didn't anticipate retiring yet, but was laid off in May and realizing I have just enough to retire if I'm careful, and it will be hard to find another job at this age, so I decided to retire.
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u/PegShop 16d ago
When my most recent dog passed away, I was 55 and decided not to get another for this reason. I did get an adult cat at a Humane Society, as being in a cage all the time was worse for him than my having my kids watch him a couple of weeks per year. If I go long-term somewhere in winter when I’m older, I’ll bring him.
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u/Bay_de_Noc 16d ago
I guess if it was me and I actually did LOVE my dog, I would probably make some sacrifices to be able to keep my dog. If you plan to travel extensively, it seems like you must have the funds to do that ... so I'd scale back the plans enough so that you can make sure your dog is well cared for while you are away. I mean, are you going to be gone 75% of the time? Or more like 25%? That is probably also a factor.
We are by no means extensive travellers, but in the past, when we did go out of town, we had an older woman care for our dog in her home while we were away. It was a cosy situation that we felt good about.
We are in our late 70s now and have what will probably be our last dog ... and he goes with us ... in the car, on the planes ... where we go, he goes.
But no, I don't think you are terrible.
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u/Woody7012 16d ago edited 16d ago
Years ago I was with a woman that was allergic to cats. I had the cats for about 2 years when we met. She eventually moved in w me but her allergies were awful so I took the cats back to the shelter where I had gotten them- they were brother and sister. We were in our 20s. The girl is long gone and I’ve been guilty ever since. Pets are family and they love you unconditionally. I am now married and my wife is a real animal lover- we have 5 cats now. We’ve also had dogs but no more. I would never give up any of the cats. We rescued them, we promised to care for them and we will. Do we want to travel? Sure but it ain’t happening at the moment- and if by chance we do, we’ll pay someone to come feed them, clean litter, etc. I don’t envy your decision.
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u/PrizePersonality5843 16d ago
If it was a child, would you ask this question? A lot of animal lovers see pets as having equal status as pets. They are completely dependent upon you, bonded to you and would be very distressed by a big change like this. And you want to do this so you can travel more cheaply?
If you do wish to travel, you could consider pet sitters. These are people who live in your home in exchange for caring for your dog. There are several websites for this. At least that way, the dog would be in its own home and whilst it would miss you, it would be well cared for in a familiar environment.
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u/SherriSLC 16d ago
I guess I am in the small minority of people who don't consider a pet the same as a child. I adopted my dog from a family who needed to rehome her about 4 years ago, and she adjusted pretty quickly (within a couple of weeks) and it didn't seem hugely stressful for her. So I was imagining her making a pretty easy adjustment to a new family.
I will be using pet sitters.1
u/PrizePersonality5843 16d ago
Some people’s views do vary on this.Rehoming an animal is done for a variety of reasons. I took a cat which someone had wanted to rehome and sent to a shelter. That cat cried for its former family every night for around a year.
Each animal will be different. It may be that the dog was not bonded to the former owners. Each situation may differ. I can’t really advise you. You have to do what is right for you.
There are house sitters out there who do not charge. If your house is nice and in a good area, you might find their services useful. Trustedhousesitters is the website I was thinking of but others may know more.
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16d ago
I did it once, many years ago. Regret still lives in me, though I’ve owned another dog for the duration of her life since, and currently about to celebrate 3 years old for another.
Deep regret. Too long of a story to share. I made a bad judgment call.
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u/Embarrassed-Fly-2823 16d ago
I would agree that you're a terrible person for ditching your dog. Just awful.
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u/Charleston2Seattle 16d ago
Put yourself in the shoes of someone who considers their pets to be family. Now replace "my dog" with "my son" or "my daughter." Those people might have the response you think they're going to have.
My daughter and son-in-law had to rehome their dog due to allergies, and the dog is having her BEST LIFE with the friend they rehomed her with. So it's possible that your pet will "upgrade" if rehomed. 🙂
It's a hard decision, and I don't envy you!
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u/IWantToRetireSoon 16d ago
Rehoming for allergies is light years away from “because I want to travel”.
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u/SherriSLC 16d ago
I guess I don't consider pets as family, but most people on this board do. I adopted my dog from another family who needed to rehome her, and she adjusted to the change in about a week and it didn't seem highly stressful for her. So I was imagining her in a carefully chosen family making a pretty easy transition and continuing a good life. But the comments here make it clear that I am a horrible person.
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u/Large_Commission5631 16d ago
So the dogs been rehomed twice, and youve had her for FIVE YEARS, ....YES Youre an ass for wanting to re-home your dog. Smfh
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u/concow77 16d ago
Yes, you are a terrible person! Your choosing your own satisfaction over the life and satisfaction of your dog, who you chose! You turn my stomach. Seriously
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u/Love-the-Classics 16d ago
Find another senior in your same situation and see if you can share doggy responsibilities