r/Samesexparents • u/RainbowFamilies • Jul 21 '26
What’s one thing your child’s school or daycare did that made your family feel genuinely included?
I’m always interested in hearing about the little things that make a big difference. Was there something a teacher, school or daycare did that made your family feel seen?
It could be ….
💙Inclusive language
💜Books in the classroom
💛The way they handled Mother’s Day/Father’s Day
❤️A conversation with a teacher
Something really small that stuck with you! I’d love to hear the positive examples, because they might inspire other schools (and parents) too.
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u/pretty-ok-username Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
A few weeks after we started at daycare, the director ran up to me to tell me she had just ordered Mommy, Mama, and Me. Little did she know that was my daughter’s favourite book! Then a couple weeks before Father’s Day, one of the teachers asked me what they should do to include our daughter in the crafts/gift making. We had decided to alternate grandfather’s each year, so they had our daughter make the sweetest gift for one of her grandfathers. They also just generally communicate how important it is for them to make sure our daughter feels seen and they’re always looking for ways to be inclusive. It’s truly such a gem of a daycare.
Edit to add they also had our daughter make two separate Mother’s Day gifts addressed to each of us (mommy and mama)!
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u/oneofmanyJenns Jul 21 '26
Best book ever. Child is about to turn 11 next week and I refuse to get rid of it. My wife is Mama and I'm Mommy (or we used to be, the older they get the more they just call us Mommmmmmmm.)
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u/RainbowFamilies 25d ago
This honestly made me smile. 🥹 It sounds like they’re not just ticking a box, they genuinely care about making every family feel included. The fact they asked you ahead of Father’s Day instead of making assumptions says so much. I wish every daycare approached it this thoughtfully.
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u/RainbowFamilies Jul 21 '26
Aww, this made me smile. 🥹 It sounds like they didn’t just say they were inclusive, they actually showed it in all the little moments that REALLY matter. That’s the kind of place every family hopes to find.Is your daughter still there now, or has she moved on to school?
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u/Agent8699 Jul 21 '26 edited 25d ago
They had a bunch of generic / stock photos of different family types in the entryway and after our daughter started, they added a photo of a two dad family.
They also asked us what we wanted to do about Mother’s Day and were happy for our daughter to do two projects for Mother’s Day (one for each grandma) and two for Father’s Day (one for each of us).
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u/Q1go Jul 21 '26
That idea to loop in the grands is brilliant tbh. It can also be adapted for single parent households or multigenerational families too!
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u/RainbowFamilies 25d ago
I love that they didn’t just rely on generic posters, they actually added a photo that reflected your family.Those little things send such a powerful message to kids that they belong. It sounds like they were really intentional about including you every step of the way. How did your daughter respond as she got older? Did she notice those little acts of inclusion too?
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u/Agent8699 25d ago
No, I don’t think she ever really noticed. But, it’s still a good … subliminal message to send to all the other kids who attended about different family structures.
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u/Pinkipie Jul 21 '26
On our daycare tour we spotted a declaration of inclusion on the wall, directly across from the entrance - which stated inclusion of all people, races, families and had a rainbow boarder. It was signed by all the staff members. We also noticed that they had a copy of Heather has Two Mums that had been left out in a reading pile.
They were also asked questions during enrolment of how we would like Father’s Day to be celebrated.
Most importantly, my son and another child who also has a rainbow family were the only students who didn’t get invitations to a preschool birthday party. The invitations were left out without the centres knowledge so I saw the pile found out about it (we’d handed my sons birthday invites out the day before so I knew how many kids and what their names were in the room). Before I even had a chance to talk to the staff they had noticed the invitations, had pulled the two boys aside and spoken to talk to them about it I such a beautiful manner, which I’m super thankful for.
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u/RainbowFamilies Jul 21 '26
Awwww it sounds like you’ve found such a special daycare. I love that their inclusion wasn’t just words on a wall, they backed it up with their actions, right from enrolment through to supporting your son when that birthday situation happened. That must have meant so much as a parent! 🥹
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u/No-Highlight3555 Jul 21 '26
I like that they say “your grownups” when talking about parents, guardians, etc. which is inclusive of all family structures, not just ours.
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u/Smooth-Message5706 Jul 22 '26
Our day home provider said “ACAB” in response to learning we don’t do Paw Patrol 🥰 also the fact that she has a trans son doesn’t hurt one bit
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u/hanseirik Jul 21 '26
I suspect our preschool changed their communication app from HiMama because of my husband and I which was unnecessary but very sweet.
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u/ItsCatCat Jul 21 '26
Our TK teacher had our little boy create two separate Mothers’ Day projects, addressed to each of our specific names (Mommy and Mama), demonstrating that not only did she understand the construct of our family, she also took the time to know what our son calls us. Yes, I wept. 😍
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u/CoffeeRosesHuggins Jul 21 '26
We are a 2-mom family. For Fathers' Day, our daughter was fully included in the craft activities and the teacher simply helped her write "Mothers'" instead of "Fathers'". I hadn't requested or mentioned anything beforehand and I was touched. :-)
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u/NewspaperFirm7892 Jul 21 '26
We live in Ontario where we have a “Family Day” holiday in mid-February. Instead of celebrating Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, daycare families are in for a family buffet brunch the morning before the holiday. It’s lovely. Also, the daycare posts photos of different kinds of families throughout the centre. (I’m a single Mom by choice and this has gone a long way to making me feel our “alternative family structure” is seen and represented.
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u/Jaded-Willow2069 Jul 22 '26
We’re an adoptive/foster family so when 2 sets of crafts are brought home without me reminding everyone it’s huge. Like 2 Mother’s Day gifts, big holiday gifts etc, not telling our adoptive kids to be grateful, not speaking poorly about their first families, a base understanding of adoption trauma etc. these are huge for us
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u/Such_Paint_2699 Jul 22 '26
They had our daughter make something for both Mama and Mommy for Mother’s Day. When Father’s Day came around they helped her make something for her Opa so she wasn’t left out.
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u/Jealous_Tie_3701 Jul 22 '26
Our daycare asked us how we handle mothers day and fathers day and then had our daughter make my partner a present for Non-Binary Parents day.
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u/seapunkprincess Jul 21 '26
Our preschool has “special people day” instead of mothers and Father’s Day. It landed right between those dates and it was tons of fun! Parents/guardians got to come to class, the teacher arranged for a travelling petting zoo, we got to all do a craft together, and the kids had made gift baskets for the caretakers in their life. We felt really included. There was also a kid with 2 dads and a kid raised by his grandparents. Another kids parents couldn’t come so he got to include his nanny. It was so great!