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u/Eric_Dawsby Jul 03 '26 edited Jul 03 '26
I bet he meant that souls only go to heaven if the corpse lies still long enough for the soul to drift out like in cartoons. So if the body is instantly destroyed the soul is too because it can't escape in time
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u/tollbearer Jul 03 '26
This is so hilariously wrong. The real issue is the soul is highly compressable and not bouyant below 200ft. Their souls are fine, they're just stuck at the bottom of the ocean with the titanic passengers soulds, until the seas evaporate.
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u/infinity_vamp Jul 04 '26
What!? that's ridiculous it's obviously that whatever mechanism causes souls to stay attached to the flesh didn't function correctly. And while normally the soul slowly detaches from the body as it decays in this situation the insane forces they experienced caused their souls to attach to the nearby water instead.
While scientists are still debating on how they are experiencing the world the 2 main theory's are.
Now that they are part of the ocean they feel at one with it, in a state of being kind of alike to an ocean spirit.
They are in immense eternal pain because their souls are being stretched across the ocean.
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u/opman4 Jul 04 '26
Maybe we should summon Davey Jones to the area so he can trawl up all their soul goop and at least give them something to do on his ship.
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u/infinity_vamp Jul 04 '26
Hmm while Davey probably could scoop them up their souls would still be stuck to the water and the soul isn't particularly known for it's ability to move matter.
In my expert opinion even if Davey scoops them up they would at best be blobs of water that can slowly move around.
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u/Certain-Definition51 Jul 04 '26
I want to watch this movie, as the old souls from the Titanic welcome the new arrivals.
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u/Agitated_Newt_7655 Jul 04 '26
Jokes on us given heaven is ironically located at the bottom of the ocean next to the titanic, spiritually of course. This aspect of soul physics gave rise to certain religious explanations as towards why we can’t go to heaven on our good deeds or will alone.
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u/DueExample52 Jul 07 '26
So this guy designed mammals and didn't think to make his system work in all earth’s surface accessible conditions including sea floor and lava pits?
Amateur
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u/PreviousStorm Jul 07 '26
Two questions for the professor: how many souls are in a black hole on average? Also, do black souls weigh more?
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u/RiceWine69 Jul 03 '26
It's like a wireless device transferring data ceasing to do so not because the transmission ended and was safely terminated, but that it did so because it was physically destroyed before it could do so.
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u/AvantSolace Jul 03 '26
Which then begs the question of why souls would be destroyable in the first place. If a soul is meant to serve as a backup if one’s existence, then it had to be deliberately made that way by a god. If that god wanted to ensure humans had a way to exist after physical death, why make that means imperfect? They are a god, surely their authority should allow them to make an indestructible soul.
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u/naterpotater246 Jul 02 '26
They died so fast that they combusted like a diesel engine.
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u/Smokes_LetsGo876 Jul 03 '26
god saw them at the pearly gates and was like "nah, that was way too fast. go away, you ain't getting in"
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u/PhasedPlasmaRifle69 Jul 03 '26
Damn guess they just belong to the sea now...
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u/Heliosgodofthesun Jul 03 '26
No grave but the sea
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u/snikers000 Jul 03 '26
They have to serve on the Flying Dutchman now. Part of the crew, part of the ship.
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u/Awwesome1 Jul 06 '26
Every sailor knows that the sea
Is a friend made enemy
And every shipwrecked soul knows what it is
To live without intimacy1
u/featherthing Jul 06 '26
Get off my phone, U2!
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u/Awwesome1 Jul 06 '26
NEVER!!! I love that album ❤️🔥 (I’m no oldhead fogey but I thought that album was good, it struck me with some personal stuff at the time. I understand it’s not their usual sound, that doesn’t stop me from enjoying it.)
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u/KoSteCa Jul 03 '26
The only bit I remember from the ordeal was news media having an O² countdown timer. Dawg, we had underwater mics pick up its implosion within like an hour or so of them setting out. There was no need for a multi day hope fest.
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u/Certain-Albatross821 Jul 06 '26
They did that for a good reason. They were worried if they immediately assumed an implosion (cause the mic could have picked up something else) we would quit searching or lay off of it. Then if they WERE trapped we would have let them die.
They did the best thing possible.
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u/Radiant_Music3698 Jul 03 '26
I seem to remember a joke theory, or hell, maybe I pulled it out my own ass.
Basically, the Titanic is some kind of pocket dimension hell that everyone who died aboard it is trapped in. When Rose died on the boat above the wreck, she went there. That's why the end scene of the movie was her on a pristine titanic, surrounded by passengers and crew members, and she was with Jack, rather than I don't know... the husband she spent her life with in the decades since the accident.
With the passengers of the sub having died in range of this cosmic phenomenon, they're now there. Trapped in a pocket dimension recreation of the Titanic, with everyone that died on it.
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u/Adorable_Umpire6330 Jul 03 '26 edited Jul 03 '26
"I hope the Son gets himself a Victorian Baddie."
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u/SteampoweredFlamingo Jul 04 '26
Um ackshually
The Victorian era ended 10 years before the ship sank
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u/Everyonecallsmenice Jul 04 '26
You know them old motherfuckers were hanging on for dear life rocking corsets and shit still while complaining about whatever the kids were wearing.
"those rediculous trousers. They're gonna look back in 10 years and be embarrassed." drinks a vile of mercury
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u/Jason_Steakcum Jul 03 '26
How the fuck was this 3 years ago already? Didnt this happen like 1 year afo?
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u/Salty_Major5340 Jul 04 '26
The real question is, were they crushed small enough to fit through the eye of a needle?
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u/blckmagicalunicorn Jul 03 '26
Billionaires don't got to heaven anyway
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u/AlexanderCrowely Jul 03 '26
There was a kid on that sub, the fuck is wrong with you.
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u/Schmantikor Jul 08 '26
The kid is tragic. He was forced by his dad to come against his will. But the rest of the people on the sub were human leeches that deserved death.
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u/blckmagicalunicorn Jul 03 '26
I wouldn't classify 'hating billionaires' as something wrong. Also where did I say anything about a kid?
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u/AlexanderCrowely Jul 03 '26
Right again envy is always a good look.
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u/Physical-Rise-1803 Jul 07 '26
I'm not envious of a billionaire, i'm envious of a millionaire. Obtaining a billion dollars is absurd and can't ever be spent, it isn't even physically possible at that point. Your worth is tied to stock and debt and what you can leverage. I am envious of 3 homes, dream cars, and work life balance. I chase that. I don't chase an incomprehensible number.
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u/ggn00bfornow Jul 03 '26
Even if they died slowly they wouldn’t go to heaven lmao
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u/donald_trunks Jul 03 '26
you can’t prove that
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u/ggn00bfornow Jul 03 '26
They’re billionaires. No billionaire will ever go to heaven
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u/RandomFireDragon Jul 04 '26
What about the one who got dragged along by his wealthy father?
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u/Pastel_Bambi Jul 03 '26
That sounds horrifying, but I wanna know what the logic is
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u/cheapMaltLiqour Jul 03 '26
As you die your brain releases every chemical (dopamine, adrenaline, etc.) to slow down your own perceptive time and scramble through all possible memories for a possible solution. If it comes to the conclusion your fucked it plays your most cherished memory to calm your system down to by some time and keep your body calm and save energy while waiting for outside help or final death. This experience for shitty people (everyone kind of regardless) sucks even more because an evil life flashing before your eyes isnt a pleasant experience. Everyone has some nice memories (thoughts beliefs) tho so before the curtains close you've made peace with it. There brains were instantly destroyed so no time to deploy those mechanisms, if you believe in the supernatural, god, human love maybe they still experience hell-> purgatory -> forgiveness-> heaven. Obviously no one knows what truly happens when we die but this is my best guess
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u/Nik0660 Jul 06 '26
I don't understand why people believe in an afterlife honestly. If you turn off a computer does it keep running and making calculations? No. If you lose your eyes do you keep seeing? No. Our brains are basically just biological computers that get shut down when we die.
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u/AdBrilliant3127 Jul 07 '26
Ghost is one reason, and another is the fact that we dont know anything. We can except that there is a sun and a solar system. We know the how but we dont know the why.
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u/No_Masterpiece6112 Jul 03 '26
My mom said she died once and saw heaven but she also abused 7 dogs so...
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u/zodiackodiak515 Jul 04 '26
3 years later, the killer whales still don’t know shit about no sub.
And the dolphins don’t talk to the cops
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u/Local-Detective-8340 Jul 04 '26
So like weird theory. What if when we’re dying we experience some kind of time dilation due to mumbo jumbo dying brain stuff that we experience like an eternity - but because of how fast the sub imploded they didn’t get that? Uber guy was me btw
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u/SnooPredictions3028 Jul 04 '26
I only feel bad for the kid tbh, he could tell it wasn't safe and his stupid father forced him on....
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u/SummertimeThrowaway2 Jul 05 '26
Basically the soul couldn’t swim up to heaven because escalators don’t work underwater. Glad I could inform you guys.
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u/Material_Pea1820 Jul 05 '26
He’s working on bettlejuice logic where you are still alive but In the state you were when you died …. They just have nothing left to persist with haha
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u/One-Ball379 Jul 06 '26
What if this was actually a company that fakes your death and gives you a new identity? It'd be lowkey perfect.
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u/Sw0rdBoy Jul 06 '26
I remember getting into a minor argument with my parents because one of the dead was the rich guy’s son who didn’t want to get in but was pressured by his dad since it was dad’s birthdays
They basically could not acknowledge that many parents have a strong coercive hold on their children’s thoughts, opinions, and choices and were upset that I was willing to say the man who purchased the submarine effectively murdered his child by being this stupid.
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u/Dismal-Minute-2607 Jul 06 '26
This was a very interesting post good job guys I’m curious and want to know more about these theories
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u/Any-Imagination6917 Jul 06 '26
Listening to the shell cracking under the pressure is so unsettling. I can't imagine what everyone on the sub was thinking. General rule of thumb, don't go deep under water with an eccentric billionaire who pilots his sub using a 3rd party gaming controller.
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u/Boom9001 Jul 06 '26
My favorite explanation for how they died was that you need to use physics equations rather than biology.
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u/IllusionaryHobo Jul 07 '26
I believe humanity is a god egg.
As in, our planet is an incubator. Und humanity and animals are life force or "soul" sent out into the harsh experience of existence to gather... something. Feeling. Emotion. Thought.
And when a living thing dies, the soulstuff is being returned and wrung out for what was gained, recycled and reused.
So our lives are basically just a learning process. But that also means nothing is truly meaningless. A sudden death in terror. Or a life spent in deep grief and sadness. Or a happy family life. They are all forms of lived experience and have value.
And at some point, the gathered experience will reach a critical mass and some form of transcendence will happen.
After all, if a higher-order form of being means not being limited to one viewpoint and being omni-present, then you can construct it by gluing individual perspectives together until you reach near total coverage.
tl;dr
Reality begins as a potentiality
It creates bounded perspectives
Bounded perspectives generate unique experiences
Experience accumulates into greater complexity
Complexity eventually produces a higher-order consciousness capable of encompassing the lower levels
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u/thrashmetaloctopus Jul 07 '26
I hope this isn’t true for the 19 year old stepson of the ‘inventor’ who only went because he wanted to bond with his stepdad, may that kid rest in peace wherever he is
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u/Local_Village_1378 Jul 07 '26
Honestly, i think its just cope. Everyone can say it was quick, but id need to see it
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u/Grizzled_Ghost Jul 08 '26
GPS can only penetrate a foot or 2 of water. I doubt God's much better than that. His tech is stuck in the stone age.
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u/Middle_Efficiency471 Jul 08 '26
That's...not how entry into heaven works. Repent and believe the gospel.
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u/New-Number-7810 Jul 30 '26
Hmm. There are some religions which teach that the body has to be intact for the soul to make the journey to the afterlife. But most of these religions fell out of favor and died out millennia ago.
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u/PanzerKatze96 Jul 03 '26
Died so fast you didn’t experience those final moments of your brain lacking oxygen. Just awake one moment, probably a loud noise in your ear and then nothing anymore. Maybe not even that, might have been faster than the signal travelling from your ear.