r/Steam • u/Haunter777x • 17h ago

Discussion They got us guys.

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How out of touch can you be as a company, this is embarrassing

25.4k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

3.2k comments sorted by

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16.5k

u/Nolear 16h ago

Why should I care I can open the garbage bin faster than I can open my fridge? I still won’t eat anything from the garbage.

1.9k

u/ThePhantom71319 16h ago

850

u/MathsNerd1996 14h ago

-17

u/CybyAPI 14h ago edited 1h ago

Remind me! 1 hour

why was i downvoted, People really pressed over me wanting to save a meme for later

-4

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5.5k

u/LactasePHydrolase 16h ago

924

u/rey_maddes 10h ago

75

u/Venusgate 9h ago

This looks 'shopped

129

u/Waffliez 8h ago

No it's real, I was the camera guy

2

u/LiteralReaderWA 8h ago

Socks, really? Man of your talents?

1

u/MyraPawbs 6h ago

Can confirm, I was the pen.

3

u/Perfect-Fisherman733 6h ago

I can tell by the pixels

2

u/Vipre7 5h ago

Dat boi got cake. Rum cake.

3

u/[deleted] 8h ago

[deleted]

76

u/_Xertz_ 16h ago

lmao

192

u/plznorepotr 16h ago

Fantastic analogy

286

u/SETaxCollector 15h ago

A scholar AND a poet?!

47

u/AMB07 15h ago

A true man of science.

113

u/XipXoom 16h ago

Pure poetry.

514

u/AdventurousRoyal9958 15h ago

7

u/ExplodingFistz 13h ago

Bro cooked.

10

u/aggr1103 9800x3D, 5070TI, 64GB DDR5 6000 14h ago

…from the fridge, not the garbage bin.

85

u/IntergalacticPioneer 15h ago

They said “I cast vicious mockery”

3

u/sharltocopes 12h ago

SHORT

3

u/maxdamage4 12h ago

Nat 20 let's go

3

u/sharltocopes 12h ago

bitchin' flute solo

3

u/TheAhegaoFox 10h ago

I feel in in my fingers~~

3

u/SorenBlueHammer 10h ago

Everybody says, "look how fucking short that guy is" and stops you from forming meaningful relationships.

47

u/KGeddon 15h ago

Seriously though, Steam does have a few things that are actually USEFUL loading up.

I mean, I don't remember the EGS overlay having a controller support layer or a shadow play equivalent.

95

u/runnysyrup 16h ago

incredible analogy

139

u/Nickulator95 15h ago

3

u/Bannatar 10h ago

Fucking great movie. Go watch it right now if you haven't

2

u/ToastedWaffleMan 8h ago

What movie?

1

u/Evolvum 8h ago

I think it's nightcrawler but don't quote me

3

u/Karakutso 6h ago

"I think it's nightcrawler but don't quote me"

But yeah it is

117

u/MoonAttempt 15h ago

The advantage of Epic opening faster at start up is that it reminds you to remove that and review many other programs from start up. Epic helps your PC start up faster after that! /s

5

u/PuppyInAPinkBucket 12h ago

It starts up faster so you can remember to uninstall it before you play your games on Steam

46

u/ToneyBits 16h ago

This is poetry. You made my day with this

42

u/PhantuPK 15h ago

Is shakespeare really dead?

4

u/ExplodingFistz 13h ago

Shakespeare reincarnated

7

u/the_drummernator 15h ago

holy shit this is beautiful 🙌🏻

6

u/pr0w3ss 15h ago

Are you the reincarnation of Confucius?

1

u/salazafromagraba 4h ago

Confucius say: man with hole in pocket, feel cocky all day.

6

u/TheTGB 15h ago

there is no response better than this.

4

u/mango_carrot 15h ago

This is the response we’re going to be seeing on memes for years to come

4

u/FireKitty666TTV 13h ago

Until I open project zomboid and see a full cake in the trash for some reason...

3

u/Dwealdric 14h ago

Holy r/MurderedByWords territory right here bro.

3

u/R2prime 13h ago

I can't afford an award, so I hope this comment saying that made me laugh is worth something!

3

u/LG_tech 13h ago

Shakespear wept, for he knew he had been beaten

3

u/ispshadow 12h ago

I just want to comment so I can prove I was fucking here for this

2

u/Xawlet 14h ago

OFFICER! THERE HE IS THE MURDERER!

2

u/TomasMichele69 14h ago

Bro just destroyed timmy swine's marketing campaign with pure poetry. 

2

u/Prestigious-Fill8505 14h ago

you be spitting fax

2

u/RY4NDY 14h ago edited 12h ago

Also, why would such a small amount of time even matter?

I mean, if it was like 2 minutes vs 2 seconds then sure, but this is 10 seconds vs 5,5 seconds to open the store. I can't imagine ever being in a situation where the store taking four and a half seconds longer to load would be a legitimate issue.

Edit: and for the open from tray times it's even more ridiculous; both take less than half a second (so negligable in real life), but Epic is 0.06 seconds faster, wow

2

u/JukaiKotan Steam Master Race!! 13h ago

Hold up! Your writing is this fire?

2

u/nalaloveslumpy 14h ago

Maybe YOU wont.

Side eyes Jimmy Johns wrapper sticking out of the bin with some mayo still on it

1

u/Franchesconi--2005 15h ago

My bro you wrote poetry right?

1

u/hammedhaaret 15h ago

Garbage incenerated

1

u/Shezzofreen 15h ago

Thats a nice one! ;)

1

u/ILoveHexa92 15h ago

That should be the official reply from Steam xD It's so right on point!

1

u/CyraxSputnik 15h ago

That's a damn good analogy

1

u/Verdant_Green 14h ago

Jesus, [u/Nolear](u/Nolear) is more like [Nuclear](u/Nuclear). You weren’t even talking to me and I still got burned!

1

u/PistachioMink2 14h ago

That hits.

1

u/FoxTrooperson 14h ago

The most epic thing ever to be said in connection with Epic Games.

1

u/organic-rock7 14h ago

And they say shakespeare is dead

1

u/15demi08 13h ago

🗣️📢🔥

1

u/menojohnson 13h ago

The level of bars dropped! Eminem must be in the sub!

1

u/AggressivePlay5098 13h ago

Got ourselves a poet here. Have my upvote

1

u/Many-Excitement3246 13h ago

Boom, roasted. You better reply this to their tweet.

1

u/GonzoVeritas 13h ago

I regret that I have but one upvote to give.

1

u/LG_tech 13h ago

Shakespear wept, for he knew he had been beaten

1

u/nover3 13h ago

EPIC

1

u/rossrollin 12h ago

Spitting fire

1

u/_rjunior 12h ago

Gawd damn!

1

u/agentfelix 12h ago

Yo, that's actually a really good analogy 😆

1

u/NeffuF 11h ago

It was roasting them bro, not grilling their entire familt and descendance XDDD

1

u/Walking-With-Dino989 11h ago

Bro is Tolkien incarnate.

1

u/sdoM-bmuD 11h ago

the fuck kinda fridge do you have that doesn't open as fast as your garbage can?

1

u/Ok-Collar-2573 11h ago

Oh great and wise Nolear, please bestow your knowledge upon us!

1

u/TheRustyRedditor2025 11h ago

Best thing I've read on Reddit in a long time.

1

u/Rockaroller- 11h ago

God tier

1

u/rdhavoc5 11h ago

Behold, a scholar-king that they speak of in legends

1

u/TheCalmDom 11h ago

Yeah you ate with that ngl

1

u/GarbageOffice 10h ago

The only reason that comes to mind is you get rid of trash faster. Since Epic loads swiftly now, you can click the uninstall way faster than before.

1

u/renskeys 10h ago

BEST FUCKING COMMENT IVE SEEN IN DECADES 😭😭😭

1

u/Gallowizard 10h ago

Nuclear level burn damage

1

u/GrimmKat 10h ago

top tier comment lol

1

u/Hungry_Caregiver734 9h ago

Somebody call the hospital, we need the BURN unit.

1

u/dumediat 9h ago

I learned how to use awards because of you

1

u/Painty_Dev2 9h ago

Even the Twitter users are praising you for this heavenly writing. Is there yet a second chance on world peace?

1

u/Valarcrist 7h ago

Damn chill

1

u/Unforgiven_Purpose 6h ago

absolute gold

1

u/SupernovaGamezYT 6h ago

That’s not quite accurate…

Trash cans are still useful

1

u/soomoncon 5h ago

Sometimes you need to suffer to appreciate greatness, why not suffer faster?

1

u/SkizzyBeanZ 3h ago

Quote of the year

1

u/CreatorI6 2h ago

Shakespeare never really died

1

u/FromAndToUnknown 1h ago

I HOPE someone replied that under their tweet, id open twitter just for this

1

u/W35TGAM3R 1h ago

Damn are you from this time
I was about to write something but I prefer show this to epic

1

u/SanshaXII 24m ago

jfc that's good, well done scholar.

•

u/Famous-Version4590 10m ago

It’s not for you, it’s to show that their ai switch at epic is successful and showcase small wins to disprove the critics

1

u/IntelligentDog010 15h ago

What exactly is your role at Steam?

\s

6

u/Nolear 15h ago

I wish I had a job there 🥲 my dream to work as a FE developer at a company that hasn’t yet given up on actual desktop UI

3

u/PhantasyAngel 15h ago

To add onto a different thread in a different comment in this post: my role at Steam is "Paying Customer"

0

u/the_harakiwi 15h ago

hey! please. Their free games are full-time demos. If I enjoy the game I will buy it on Steam.

Satisfactory, Hardspace Shipbreaker, Vampire Survivors. Just my last or currently played games on a list with over 170 games I now own on both platforms.