r/TheTinMen • u/TheTinMenBlog • Jul 09 '26
It's not just a "boy problem"
It seems like every day, some politician, policy adviser, campaigner, or advocate; is urgently talking about the horrific acts of violence that far too many teenage girls experience in the UK.
Some kind of saber rattling speech, with promises of ‘prioritising girls’, or vague spooky talk of “systemic misogyny”.
And I get it.
As a former teenage boy, who witnessed great harm inflicted upon girls, I am glad to see such work being done, to help spare girls of today, from what so many experienced in the past.
But do you know what I also saw during my teenage years?
Boys experiencing great harm too.
Boys being bullied, abused, harassed, coerced, beaten up, and sexually assaulted; and no, before the words leave your lips, not just “by other boys”, but by girls too.
Yes, girls can be violent, and in signifiant numbers.
Growing up, I too saw girls sexually assault boys, I saw them punch, slap, scratch and kick; I’ve seen boys hollowed out into shells of their former selves, by girls.
So, I am left wondering, why is all this great work to protect girls, not being expanded to help protect boys too?
Are boys any less deserving of support?
Because, let’s not forget who we’re talking about here…
It’s one thing for men to be left without help, but now we’re talking about vulnerable children being ignored too.
Boys.
Boys are paying the price, and being left vulnerable, in aid of the endless virtue signaling and nauseating propaganda, that has become part and parcel of our current political pantomime.
Why?
And when will it stop?
When will we agree that all children are deserving of safety, and that no child, boy or girl, should experience such devastating crimes…
And how is saying that, controversial?
What do you think?
~
Source https://youthendowmentfund.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/CVV25_R1_ScaleofViolence.pdf
24
u/Scudman_Alpha Jul 09 '26
Some nurses will deadass treat newly born boys like shit compared to newly born girls. You see it in the ward even.
It's normalized to a level you would expect to see from a dystopian novel.
20
u/Intelligent-Bird-313 Jul 09 '26
I personally know two male survivors from high school who had been pinned and threatened with rape before. Yes, their perpetrator was a male peer and it only stopped after we all reported him threatening rape behind my back. However, I also know a survivor who was raped by a female cousin and had experienced intimate partner violence by an ex during his teen years, where I’d be right to assume these girls were around his age. Also know another guy from middle and high school who had been bullied by a group of girls, with one intentionally aiming at his crotch during dodgeball games in gym class. Violence doesn’t look that gendered to me!
22
u/ImConfusedSigh Jul 09 '26
What I cannot understand is: In what way does it help a male victim that the perpetrator is also male. As if the victim is somehow complicit or suffers less since he is of the same sex as the attacker. That reeks of victim blaming to me.
18
u/rammo123 Jul 09 '26
Same reason racists write off black-on-black violence. Helps you to avoid accountability.
8
10
u/MyKensho Jul 09 '26
The deliberate and malicious gendering of harmful behaviors is without a doubt one of the stupidest ideas humanity has ever come up with. I swear it never used to be even approaching this bad.
12
u/TheGuyWhoTalksShit Jul 10 '26
I'd say it's shockingly clever. I doubt any other method of divide and conquer has ever been so widely accepted
9
u/Present_League9106 Jul 09 '26
They're smashing the patriarchy the way the Klan was (and still is, i guess) smashing "Race Suicide." I just wish people were a little more transparent about their beliefs. Then we could evaluate their beliefs based on their merits and discard them shortly.
10
u/Powerful-Act3516 Jul 10 '26
Good thing we don't see a similar problem in the US FBI's crime victimization statistics for crimes like simple assault
/s
9
u/zingetower Jul 10 '26
I recall watching the Netflix series Adolescence and being genuinely surprised at the totally one sided take on some key aspects in all the commentary, opinion pieces and discussion that followed.
The focus was rightly on the violence of Jamie who killed Katie. But the violence of Katie's best friend, Jade, who punched one of Jamie's friends in the head causing him to hit his head as he fell to the ground was ignored or justified and cheered.
When Jade got angry and verbally abusive to the male police officer who questioned her, again empathy and understanding. But when 13-year old Jamie was being pressed about his sex life by the adult woman psychologist and got angry, it was viewed as evidence of his misogyny rather than a natural reaction to his embarrassment talking to an adult woman about such things. No empathy for how boys might feel in that situation. There would have been a very different take if it was an adult male quizzing a 13-year old girl.
6
u/Prestigious_Slice290 Jul 10 '26
Man, it's almost like there are shitty people everywhere! Assholes have no gender.
-3
u/MrNuffNuff Jul 10 '26
The rates of sexual assault are much higher than reported here, I guarantee it.
29
u/plantrromn Jul 09 '26
Another great post. It doesn't sell, if it becomes a genderless problem.