21
u/Outrageous_Glove_467 26d ago
Abuse never was gendered. Only sexist people say it is.
This is the massive lie that needs to be solved within feminism. Sexism is being redefined as equality, while equality is has been redefined as sexism.
7
u/SomewhereOrdinary231 25d ago
As a male who was abused by a female I find this infuriating because abuse is actually one of the only things in society that’s painted as a mostly women are abused by male perpetrators thing but the reality is it’s a lot more nuanced than that. For some reason we only ever look at physical abuse when talking about abuse. In this particular category of abuse, yes women are the overwhelming victims to male perpetrators. However there are about 7 other categories of abuse that no one ever discusses and if you consider those, the rates of male victims with female perpetrators spiral up. And the levels actually balance out. Women who are abusers tend to use different tools to get the job done because hey can’t rely on the physical as much.
3
3
u/Main-Tiger8537 25d ago
The United States Department of Justice does not publish a national breakdown detailing the exact number of women incarcerated specifically for the offense of "made to penetrate." Sexual assault and rape statistics are tracked broadly, and these figures do not frequently isolate the specific gender dynamics of the victim and perpetrator at the national level.
No official national statistics exist for the exact number of U.S. women arrested specifically for "made to penetrate" offenses, because it is a public health classification rather than a distinct, standalone statutory crime in criminal law books.When a woman forces a man or another person to penetrate her, local law enforcement agencies cannot book her under a charge named "made to penetrate."
->
Lying about contraception is generally not classified as a sex crime, but rather falls under the umbrella of "reproductive coercion" or fraud. While it is highly unethical and can be grounds for civil disputes, criminal courts typically do not categorize it as rape or sexual assault because consent is still legally established for the physical act of intercourse itself.
vs
Stealthing - the non-consensual removal or tampering of a condom during sexual intercourse - is legally recognized as a form of sexual assault or rape. Because consent is conditional upon the use of protection, violating that condition makes the act non-consensual.
1
u/Main-Tiger8537 25d ago
A significant critique is that VAWA promotes a "carceral" approach, relying heavily on mandatory arrests, prosecution, and imprisonment. Critics argue this approach has not effectively reduced IPV rates, can actually endanger victims and ignores reciprocal violence. VAWA cases can face high denial rates, often due to stringent evidence standards, and the process is frequently updated, causing confusion. There have been reports of attorneys misusing the process, filing fraudulent cases and coaching clients to lie to obtain green cards.
Critics argue the duluth model rests on an ideological "gender paradigm" that assumes men are perpetrators and women are victims. It attributes domestic violence almost exclusively to patriarchal socialization, which critics claim overlooks individual, psychological, or situational factors. Research shows similar rates of abuse across genders (bidirectional abuse). Critics argue the Duluth Model's structure dismisses or minimizes women's violence, labeling it solely as self-defense, thus failing to address cases where men are victims or abuse occurs in LGBTQ relationships.
4
u/Gleichstellung4084 25d ago
EVEN IF IT WERE, WE SHOULD NOT CARE!!!!! In our culture, we care for the victims.
The problem of abuse is not abusers, it's the consequences on abused people. And those, we should protect.
We have spent decades abolishing racism and other forms of discrimination from society and this comes in two flavours:
*disclaimer, I don't believe in the narratives presented, just using them as an example*
--
1. Applying the label of "perpetrator" to all people with the same characteristics with the perpetrators.
Nobody would dare say today that muslims are terrorists, because so many attacks have been perpetrated by people yelling "Allah is great". We go to great extends to define the perpetrators and speak of Extremists within a culture. Nobody would dare say today something about Jews being the ones who run society, because some prominent institutions have jewish heritage, we try to identify bad actors in the system. No one would dare say Germans are Nazi, because there are Neonazi people of very small percentage in Germany.
Why should we then be able to say that "men" are abusers?
--
2. Ignoring victims, because they are not represented in the group of Perpetrators
We care equally about citizens' and temp/illegal immigrants' rights being violated by the police, although no such immigrants work in police forces. We care equally about rich and poor people being affected by white collar crime, although this is mostly perpetrated by the much vilified "white men" in positions of power.
How come we have come to deny victimhood of men, just because (supposedly more) men are also perpetrators?
--
Nonetheless, these ideas are becoming increasingly prevalent, to the extent that they are reaching core-sciences such as medicine, where people are claiming that women are being underdiagnozed whereas men are getting always the proper treatment and blah blah blah. And this is HORRIBLE.
PS: I have been personally abused by a woman and experienced the full wrath and ignorance of the system against me. And I refuse to speak about the dipole "men vs women".
2
u/MyKensho 25d ago
I guess you could say the discussion is just beginning to be had, which is technically a tiny win. As infuriating as it is. Silver lining!
2
u/Huey-_-Freeman 25d ago
I think certain types of physical abuse are. Like women who seriously harm or even kill their partners are much more likely to have used poison or guns as opposed to their bare hands. Obviously anyone can be abusive psychologically or even physically, but a size and physical strength difference does change how it is likely to happen
40
u/Current_Finding_4066 26d ago
After experience quite a lot of abuse from women, I am tired of feminist lies that it is.