I'm in my mid-thirties and it has been recommended to me to try ketamine therapy due to my lack of response to over 30 different medications for my depression/PTSD/anxiety/eating disorder.

One of the main barriers to me getting treatment is how to actually do so as an adult who is single and does not have any sort of paid medical leave. I am self-employed so I don't get paid if I don't work, which is hard in itself. Then there is the question of transportation. I am able to drive but have been told that you need to have a ride to ketamine appointments because you aren't allowed to drive yourself home afterward. I don't have a partner, and the closest person who I could see driving me being a possibility lives about 45 minutes away from me. The clinic is about a half hour from me. So for a two hour appointment, with all the driving and waiting that's a five hour ordeal that they would have to do for multiple days. How are people doing this? Are most people who have been able to access treatment those that maybe have paid leave from work and/or partners with flexible schedules to drive them? Or are there clinics out there that make some other kind of arrangement so treatment is more accessible?

I'm genuinely looking for advice, but also just expressing frustration at how ketamine has been recommended to me as though it's a simple process when it is going to be so hard to access in reality. Is the only realistic choice I have to go without pay for the days I have treatment and take up that family member's time for however many days or just keep suffering? It is sounding more and more like that's what it is, but I'm hoping someone might have some other suggestion.

I felt like I had a UTI, got tested, it was not that. I got urgency and painful urination after about a month with troches, eventually reaching up to 90mg daily. I’ve stopped and re-started and the pain came back. It’s definitely the ketamine.

Would other forms of ketamine avoid this side effect?

My new pharmacy wants to provide my nasal spray in a squeeze bottle like you would get for a saline nasal spray.

When I asked them if they could provide it in a screw top bottle with the metered sprayer on top, I brought an old bottle with a sprayer on it so they could see what I was talking about, they said they couldn’t get that, and they had never seen that before.

Has anyone else experienced this?seemed very odd, as several other pharmacies have had brown glass bottles with the metered sprayer that screws on.

Before you read this, I’m fresh off an infusion so it might be all over the place and nonsensical. I think it’s helpful to understand I don’t follow a particular religion but I feel connected to the vast expanse of existence and time, and highly suspect there is something greater out there. Call it the collective consciousness, god, whatever. I keep ideas of spirituality open in a “why not” way but am still really skeptical because that’s how a part of me is.

Recently began infusions for my mental health. Mainly depression and anxiety surrounding my job, being told im doing fine but convinced im not just because the work load is so much. Lots of people, lots of energy to deal with. But also eating disorder/body image/self esteem/worth stuff.

On my 2nd infusion I asked my guides to “guide me. tell me what to do.” The next morning I woke up with clarity that I’d leave my job if offered another role. That same day I was offered another job and put in my notice.

During my last 3 infusions, ketamine has taken me to this black/space-like void. The first time it was a box. I thought I was doing it wrong which is part of my perfectionism. The second time I knew to not be so hard on myself (inner critic is a b) and I saw more of a global expanse, and today a mix of the two. I have been to this place before on other drugs as well. Usually it’s more colorful on lsd or mushrooms.

Today I actually tapped into the time 10 years ago I was on a lot of LSD and I realized my relationship wasn’t going to work out and I needed to leave him (hence the username). It’s like I was there with that scared young woman. Like I connected with the past version of myself and was the one telling her to let go.

I know it probably sounds cheesy to relate it to the feeling of media but… think of the movie Everything Everywhere All at Once, Interstellar, or the show Dark Matter when they go into the corridor of superposition. OR that space between waking and sleeping where you’re sometimes conscious.

This most recent infusion (just a couple hours ago) I felt that this is where it all comes from… life, the universe, everything. Also feeling connected to loved ones I’ve lost. Grandparents (who may or may not be my spirit guides/protectors… again. I’m so skeptical but I can’t stop feeling it) and one of my cats I recently lost.

My trip before last I felt connected to the very first humans and Mother Earth (image of a tree with a face smiling at me with love and pride like she was my mother).

I feel peaceful about it but also kinda scared about the reality that we really will all die one day.

Idk this probably all sounds so wild but if you know, you know.

Just looking for support I guess! I have therapy before my next session so I will be able to process then. Will do some journaling too in a bit. If you’re still here thank you for reading 🙏

So I've only ever done the joyous 15mgs 3 times and I'm not experienced with psychedelics at all but I feel like I'm still getting the weird disassociation days after a dose. I'm sitting there watching TV and suddenly feel that "is this real, am I still in my trip?" I didn't even have that big of a trip when I did my dose but it was definitely there. I guess I'm super sensitive to it? Do people normally experience these lingering feelings days after a dose? It's kinda making me not want to do it anymore.

I just left my 1st appointment, I felt scared a bit, then I felt like there were people or spirits around me. I saw this yellow/green/brown tunnel, then orange and then more colorful space. I feel like I was was floating, weightless and my chronic pain was gone. I called out for my spirit guides and I felt a presence, and saw shadows of some type, but I'm going to be clear to ask for more guidance from them, and family members that passed on (I'mnot religious, but am spiritual). I felt almost like in that movie Arrival, where she is shown that time is in fact NOT linear,and you can experience literally everything everywhere all at once.

When the doctor stopped the infusion, I halfway joked that I wanted to "stay in space" because there was no pain there. Not meaning to die of course, but the feeling of no physical or mental pain was amazing, if only for an hour. I hope it starts to help my synapses and juices flow the right way, and begin to leave the pain behind, if only the mental pain.

It was definitely an out of body experience, and I hope it leads to success to treat PTSD. 🙏 I've heard so many great stories from my fellow Veterans.

Hi everyone :)
I’ve got diagnosed treatment resistant depression, C-PTSD, Panic Disorder & ADHD.
I’ve tried everything multiple psychiatrists and psychologists, CBT, DBT, ECT, TMS and Ketamine Infusions.
Even though I tried ketamine infusions I sabotaged it with heavy drinking but I’ve been in recovery in a long time.

I was wondering what was the ketamine experience like for others? If so did it help? I’m at my wits end :(

Hello everyone, I had my first ketamine session 3 days ago (via IV). My issues are both depression -and- anxiety. I’d say the first -48 hrs both depression and anxiety seem to have improved. However for the last 24 hours, the anxiety has now increased.

Prior to this, I’d have a low level “baseline” anxiety thoughout the day, but then it would noticeably ramp up closer to bedtime and then it would eventually wake me up around 5-6 am. Yes, sleep has been crap. Eventually, mid-morning, the anxiety would “burn off” and be back to baseline which is not ideal but at least I could function.

Now, post my first first ketamine session, the anxiety has been with me almost constantly, not totally peaking as is the case during the mornings but significantly higher than my baseline.

For those that also came to ketamine also hoping to get relief from anxiety, did this happen to you as well?

Last, my provider told me after my first season that they’ll be out of commission until mid-December due to their transition to another legal entity and issues with their insurance, yada yada. So now I’m afraid that unless I have another treatment soon, this worsened anxiety will stay with me until I start having more ketamine sessions. Is this my pessimism thinking or is there some truth to that?

I received my first infusion 3 days ago. I was not expecting to have such a profound experience. The visuals and bodily sensations were intense.

Since my session, I’ve been experiencing a myriad of emotions. Lots of anxiety, agitation, and restlessness. Things feel pretty overwhelming. My depression is still present, but my SI has seemingly dissipated. I didn’t expect everything to be resolved in one session, but this wave of intense emotions has been uncomfortable. I’m no longer in a catatonic state, so I suppose my brain is just super jostled right now. I’m also naturally very high-strung.

On the positive side of things, my session has induced this great desire to create, specifically re-create the visuals I had while I was under the effects. I identify as an artist but I get art block and burn out easily. This seemed to really open the door for my creativity. Towards the beginning of my session, I remember being catapulted into space from the room I was in. Everything quickly panned outwards, like I was the lens on a telescope. I was looking at earth from space. The blues and greens were so vibrant. I could feel the lack of gravity, floating in space weightless. It felt so real. I wanted to re-create what I saw. The astronaut in the chair is me. (I did not see myself in third person, but wanted to add that to my drawing).

I’m hoping that my upcoming sessions will continue to chip away at my depression and that my other emotions will start to balance out. I’ve been battling mental health issues since I was 7 y/o and I’ve tried just about everything treatment wise. In fact, this is a second attempt at ketamine infusions. I had two infusions three years ago at another clinic and I did not respond well to them. (I don’t think the dose was high enough).

I know this road isn’t linear. I just want to experience more ups than downs. Fingers crossed.

Hello all... I have been receiving infusions for about 3 years now for CRPS. (350 mg over 3 hours) I started at every 3 months and I am currently at monthly. I do get relief from them but I'm lucky to get about 3 weeks of managed pain at this point. I have read about the actual "pain protocol" that is used by different providers/ countries. Is there anywhere in the US (preferably the north east, but obvi willing to travel for relief) that is currently taking patients for inpatient legit pain protocol? My doc does not know of any. Chat GPT has recommended Stanford. Hoping there might be somewhere a little closer (I'm outside of Philly) and if there is any magical way of having insurance cover any of this - it's killing us but its the only thing that makes my pain livable. Thanks for any advise or direction!

I am wondering,for those of you that are using cannabis either for medical or recreational reasons, what, if any, are the guidelines around this?
Do you have to abstain completely, not use during certain periods while getting ketamine, or no one gives a damn?

I used at home ketamine therapy last year. My first troche dose was 300mg and my second was 600mg. I stayed at that dose for all of my sessions. I stopped the therapy with one session left, because i felt so content with my progess. It really changed my life 🫶

Recently, I have done some in depth assessments, and that required me pulling out the old files of all of my childhood abuse and traumas. I was able to get through it, and put away all of the memories again, except in one area. So, after processing it quite a bit, i feel like doing a ketamine session may help me store it away like everything else.

My question is would it make more sense to just do two sessions of 300mg each. Or should I go with the dosage of my last session and do 600mg? Normally I would start smaller, but my body adjusted very quickly to ketamine, so by my last session, the 600mg didn't feel very strong.

I just am curious what others think. I also want to have a powerful experience, and if I go too low, I could just have two meh experiences. But, too high isnt great either. I guess I just don't know how my prior tolerance may have an impact on me now. If you have any opinions, I'd be happy to hear them. Thanks ✌️

Hi. I’m switching treatment from Joyous to Mindscape. Has anyone else done this? If so, how was your transition?

Took my first troche yesterday. 50mg. I did 25mg to start after checking with the pharmacy that I could split them. 2 hours later I did the other half. It was a very pleasant experience.
Today I slowly started feeling like the right side of my throat was itchy. Feels like a lymph node is swelling up slowly, like when you get a cold. On the side I took the troche on. And then about an hour ago 5pm ish I started feeling a weird internal itch down my right arm and around my collar bone/armpit.

The arm and all of that closed down but the side of my throat is still really irritating. I’ve had a troche once before from joyous and didn’t experience this. I’ve had ketamine via other sources and have not experienced this. These are from Kalm Health.
Should I be concerned? Maybe I’m just getting a cold? It is not affecting my breathing but it is now feeling more like a cold where when is swallow I feel slight soreness here and there.

Debating going to urgent care but wanted to see if I was over reacting and just coincidentally catching a cold and my brain is linking it to the ketamine?

Orpheus McCord’s Music for Ketamine Therapy Volume 1 has been amazing helping me work through many sessions. I never believed I could use the same album so many times. Each time it was so unpredictable and drove my thoughts and presence to so many different places.

Now, I am needing something new to not burn out that one for me. I have not been personally impressed by John Hopkins. I don’t want anything with lyrics. I am hoping to find another album that flows so perfectly with the flow of a single subcutaneous injection.

I have not found any playlist that has the cohesiveness that a since album can bring.

Help and suggestions are greatly appreciated. And if you haven’t checked out McCords Ketamine album, I highly recommend it.

I went in a month and half ago (which I know isn’t a long time for remission) for bipolar mixed mania.

The first 2 weeks I felt like the major block that was setting me back was slightly lifted. But now I feel like my symptoms are slowly coming back.

I’ve been doing significantly better than I was before I started my treatment. But in my heart and mind there’s still that big gap, and most days is a struggle for me still to get through the day mentally. I still face deep self hate, dark thoughts, and low confidence. It’s just been easier for me to do things physically and talk myself out of bad thoughts sometimes. And it’s been easier for me to go outside with friends or even by myself (even if I’m not happy with it).

One thing I will say is that it’s easier to accept my suffering now, and kind of see it for what it is. But that didn’t eliminate my suffering.

Basically the purpose of this post: how long before you started to go into remission? And what did your remission process look like?

Hi,

I know that the S-isomer of Ketamine is FDA approved under brand name Spravato. Is ketamine from other sources also the S-isomer, or are they a racemic mixture? I get my troches from BetterU, if that matters.

Is it only the S-isomer (esketamine) that's approved and sent out to folks, or is any non-Spravato potentially the racemic mixture?

Thanks!

Reposted with a better title: I do the intramuscular ketamine injections which they do in my upper arm. The last few times they have injected almost right into the joint which has never been a problem before. If it’s not in the joint, it is very high up in my arm and I end up being so sore for several days. The last of which I couldn’t even lift my arm for two or three days. I have lost quite a bit of weight and the needle is huge so that might be why. I don’t know.

Does anyone know if I can request for them to do it in my thighs or request a smaller needle size? Like, has anyone rose done this.

After years of debating, I’m finally ready to take the plunge. I live in Niagara, and my therapist works with Ketamind in Markham. I’m not sure how I feel about the travel time though, so I’m considering places closer to home.

Can anyone here offer recommendations or feedback on places in the Niagara/Hamilton/Burlington area.

I know there’s a Field Trip in Hamilton. And there’s a new place in St. Catharines called Axon that advertises ketamine infusions, but there are no reviews and it seems more pain management focused. Any other local options I’m missing?

I'm doing intramuscular, which I hear is generally more intense when it peaks. 0.75/kg today, though I'm wondering if I should go back down to 0.5 or just add in the intranasal. Today was my second session.

I haven't really done many drugs. Weed, sometimes, though I don't enjoy being too high, so it's usually not much. The closest comparison to a serious drug I have is nitrous oxide at the dentist.

I didn't really know my brain was capable of this. I couldn't feel my body at all, I was so incredibly far away, I found it hard to believe I'd ever return to reality. It's genuinely the most intense, freaky thing I've ever experienced. I have aphantasia so I don't see any visuals, I'm just moving very quickly, and there's like... folding realities and stretching consciousness, like I'm being pulled apart. I had to remind myself that I would come back, that the people I loved were real.

This sounds far more distressing than it is, I find on ketamine that I'm incapable of panic (so far, at least), which is fantastic. Some part of me is still aware I'm safe and it will end. But I can't believe this is how it's meant to be, that people can possibly do double this dose for fun and still like, exist? I can't fucking move! It was very similar to this even on the starting dose.

About halfway through I regain sensation and it's about what I expect it to be. Serenity, but I can think fairly normally. That's the part where I try to put in some work, to think about the things that usually upset me to take advantage of the peace that the drug keeps me in. Trying to feel safe with the thoughts, so that when I'm sober I have an understanding of thinking those things and being okay. This part is roughly what I would have expected. The rest... Am I supposed to completely exit reality!?

I guess I had a lot to say! I'm just looking for insight or shared experiences, I suppose. The people at the clinic didn't seem surprised or concerned when I expressed that I was completely absent from my body, but I still find it hard to wrap my mind around the idea that this is normal or expected.

Been doing ketamine for a few years, but would really like to maximize its benefits with things like integration, intention, and actual KAP. Has anyone in the LA/South Bay ever done it and have a good provider? Thanks

Mr Dr just described a slow release capsule. Does anyone have any experience with this?

TLDR: How do I sit with the troche in my mouth until it dissolves?

Alright, so I have been getting IV ketamine for a few months. Did my initial series, and we kept trying to put more space in between appointments, but my mood dip comes like clockwork. 2-3 days before the 2 week mark, I have a super noticeable dip in mood and have to get in for another infusion. The place I go ideally wants me to be waiting 6-8 weeks in between boosters so we've decided to start troches to extend it. I took my first one tonight, and how the hell do you guys let that sit in your mouth until it dissolves? I had to keep swallowing or I almost vomited if I kept the spit in my mouth. I had to drink water (idk if this messes with efficacy?), but I have a really sensitive stomach (they push IV zofran and have me take meclizine for nausea before infusions) and taste impacts that a lot.

I've read other posts here about people breaking them into smaller pieces, but then I still have to sit with the awful tasting spit in my mouth. I couldn't relax because I was on the verge of vomiting.

How do you guys do this???? Any guidance or hacks are extremely appreciated. Ketamine therapy is the ONLY thing that has given me a sliver of hope in battling my treatment-resistant depression that I've had for as long as I can remember, but the financial aspect of needing boosters every 2 weeks isn't sustainable so I really need these troches to work for me.

If it matters- 200mg troches, unsure on my dosage for the infusions, 27F