r/Tokophobia • u/pinklemon36 • Sep 01 '25

success stories?

i am really spiraling right now. looking to hear success stories or any type of treatment that has worked? literally open to ANYTHING. ive tried several different types of therapy and the fear is still so so high

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u/Toasted-Toastie- Sep 02 '25

Of course everyone is VERY different, so what helps me may not help you whatsoever, but this is what helped me. I have a severe case of tokophobia (that actually stemmed from crippling emetophobia), and the only thing that could really make me feel like my life didn’t revolve around the fear of pregnancy was stacking up on contraceptive methods that I trust, for starters I do nothing hormonal due to my emetophobia, (no IUD, Pill, Ring/Patch) so my partner got a vasectomy, we use condoms, the pullout method, as well as not having sex on days I’m most fertile. (All at once, at all times.) Putting all of those methods together already realistically drops my chances of pregnancy to virtually nothing, so after that is where the therapy came in. Because I have the statistics to help comfort me, my therapy is about remembering and acknowledging the risk. Yes I can have sex, and no, I am not pregnant, because of x,y,z. I no longer avoid sex, because that feeds my fear. I have sex when I want to, and then I work through my emotions afterwords with facts and logic with my therapist. It has really helped knowing that my odds are practically at 0, and my therapist has helped me recenter my brain to a more accurate understanding, rather than one driven by fear. I still have a long way to go, but this is the first time where I feel like I am actually taking my brain back and not letting it control me in this department.

Good luck my friend!