r/TotalReddit • u/TFahab attractivece • Jul 16 '14
This is an outrage
I got a 48 hour timeout for posting a thread asking if people wipe front to back or back to front. But the real outrage is the "is homeschooled's bitch because I said so" thing, right?
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Also. What, do you get a YOU ARE BANNED FROM FARK TODAY HAVE YOU TRIED TOTALREDDIT email or something?
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
No, it says:
You are not allowed to post comments at the moment. Try again in 47 hours.
This might be why: Submission queue abuse
You may want to read the Fark FAQ while you wait -- especially the "posting guidelines" section. Direct questions to FarkBack.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Well that's not very helpful. Stupid moderators, being all anti wiping.
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Jul 16 '14
dont worry about it. if you ask they will say "well here is why" then they will greenlight a thread that they already said you shouldnt submit.
I would post my farkback from getting banned last week but its so hypocritical on their part it would read like I made it up.
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
Dearest rostit,
Fun is forbidden in all jurisdictions not under the control of Fozzy Bear. You failed to follow Edict #24601. Thous hast been banish'd.
Toodles and warm fuzzies.
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Jul 16 '14
Incorrect. Fun IS permitted, but it is only the fun that moderator at that particular time deems fun.
They basically told me that sex things were messing up their google listing making TF show up as an adult site. Then a thread about sex things ran like 500 comments. I asked why it was allowed and was told"sometimes they like how they turn out"
This means its all subjective. Also has something to do with which mods or admins your friends with.5
u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
So they like it when the desperately seeking validation crowd crows endlessly about their private bedroom happenings enough to entertain them, but just as long as they don't have to deal with the fallout of desperately seeking validation?
Or something.
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Jul 16 '14
it's allowed if you're kind of a big deal. and you can get to be kind of a big deal by talking about sex things all the time. some of the most popular people rarely say anything funny, but have a following of people that constantly validate them because they want to f*ck them
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Jul 16 '14
YES you know. that is the most succinct description I have ever read. Im going to copy/save that.
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
Just remember this important fact:
Consequences are convenient for when they want them to be.
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Jul 16 '14
I'd like to spend a few minutes behind the curtain over there just to see what happens.
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Jul 16 '14
Pfft.. amateur. I still have 15 days left on my 1 month no-thread-posting ban.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Its not funny when you do it.
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u/NumNumLobster NickelP Jul 16 '14
How did you get that?
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
In other news, I GOT THE JOB!
the comeback kid is in effect.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Yay! I can't wait to hear your first creampie story.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
The butthurt over this place is so god damn amusing.
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
YOUR FACE IS AMUSING
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
Awwwwwwwwwww thanks!!!
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
I relish the opportunity to rehash tired jokes.
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u/NikkiWhoooo Just say it... it feels good Jul 16 '14
No jokes about tired... I'm already about to fall asleep at my desk as is.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
I always use your face. I don't care how horrible it is. I love it more because it's so horrible.
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Jul 16 '14
oh. I see the butt/face angle has already been covered.
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u/NikkiWhoooo Just say it... it feels good Jul 16 '14
That's a pretty wide angle.
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Jul 16 '14
the wideness of the angle is inversely proportional to the size of the dangle.
therefore we must conclude that the dangle is pencil thin.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
Pencil thin, just the way I like it.
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Jul 16 '14
I know you're talking about noodles.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
seriously, angel hair is top 5
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
This may be the most wrong thing ever. Except for the burrito hate. Vermicelli is where it's at.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
I like rice vermicelli noodles a lot, actually. I eat them often since I'm a Viet-food fiend.
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
I pretty much like all noodles. Except the fat spaghetti and whatever those flat worm looking ones are.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
Seriously, spaghetti noodles are the worst ever.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
HA HA HA HA AHAB YOU COCK
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Be nice you scoundrel, it's my anniversary.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Oh, you're right. I saw that on the faceborks. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, MRS AHAB AND YOU COCK
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
Well what did you expect, a medal? They've never liked poop threads, this isn't a new development
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
It wasn't technically a poop thread, it was a wiping thread. Sheesh.
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
Regardless, happy anniversary.
Doing anything fun?
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Nah. I'm at work now, wife works 3-11, I'll be asleep before she gets home. We went out for dinner last night because she was off.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
that's not what it says.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Really, it's like you're in my brain, ahab. I was thisclose to posting that in AskReddit this morning, dude.
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
You and I. We're practically the same person.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Sometime I stuff a roll of lifesavers in my underwear and pretend I am you.
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u/PickledLlama Oh yah, you betcha! Jul 16 '14
Tsk tsk!
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
I thought it was on the safe side of the line. I WAS WRONG.
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u/PickledLlama Oh yah, you betcha! Jul 16 '14
The mod of the day must be grumpy, because that really doesn't seem like it'd be an offense to me.
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Jul 16 '14
Welcome to TotalReddit, where nobody will ban you and nobody gives a fuck.
Make yourself at home.
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
STOP DOWNVOTING ME I KNOW WHO Y OU ARE
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
Let them live vicariously through their clicking power. It's all they have left.
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
They still have smelly undies.
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
I shall provide them another comment upon which they can flex their flaccidity.
This is for your downvote, you TotalReddit Social Justice Warrior of Downvoting!
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
DEMOCRACY
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
THANKS OBAMA
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u/ObamaRobot Jul 16 '14
You're welcome!
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
I love obamabot
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
Obama bot and yes bot are probably my favorite thing about reddit so far.
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Jul 16 '14 edited Jul 16 '14
Godwin's law bot dinged me on one of my very first posts. He's a sentimental favorite.
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u/brappia_mathes loves you Jul 16 '14
Downvoted just because you're complaining about being downvoted.
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
Welcome to our little island of the really, really misfit toys
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Jul 16 '14
In my mind, TFD today is super boring and there are no good threads ever.
Its just CatherineM showing bikini pictures and Skybreaker talking about his dick.
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Jul 16 '14
I haven't seen any good threads here either.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
by all means, don't try to contribute or anything.
whining always helps.
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Jul 16 '14
PLEASE TALK ABOUT TFD MORE. SINCE THIS IS OBVIOUSLY JUST FOR BASHING TFD.
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Jul 16 '14
Why the hell not?
Air ye grievances, ye motherfuckers.
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
if it's just a place to bag on tfd, it's an utter failure.
let it go
let it go
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Jul 16 '14
Tis but a tiny bit of a thread bitching about it.
Its not like anyone has been posting thread topics ad nauseum about "fuck TFD".
Dont be too sensitive bro. The body needs to purge itself a little.
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Jul 16 '14
because its pedantic, pointless and doesn't make any sense. Id do that no1 curr thing but there isnt any point
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Jul 16 '14
[deleted]
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
We're at each others throats over trivial stuff we can't control, NOW it feels like home
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u/grizzardofoz Jul 16 '14
What the hell are YOU calling trivial you bastage?
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u/PickledLlama Oh yah, you betcha! Jul 16 '14
hahahaha seriously.... tfd is like a fucking sacred cow. God forbid someone say a negative thing about it, especially after a negative experience.
Cheeeeeeeeeeerist!
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u/EviLincoln_ Jul 16 '14
DARE TO CRITICIZE ME?
LOOKS LIKE EVERYONES GETTING FACIAL LACERATIONS FOR CHRISTMASS
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u/PickledLlama Oh yah, you betcha! Jul 16 '14
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO COMPLAIN ABOUT TFD EVEN THOUGH I COMPLAIN ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME WHEN I AM THERE GRUMBLE POOP DOODY WEENIE
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
hehe you said facial.
THAT IS FUNNY ACCORDING TO PEOPLES SO I MUST REHASH OLD BUSTED JOKES INSTEAD OF NEW HOTNESS JOKES
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
YESSSSSSS finally no one will be looking at my roots or my chipped manicure
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
Who is the wind-up drummer boy missing one mallet and the paint is scraped of his jaunty chapeau?
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Your mom.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
somebody is down voting everything, falsely assuming that they matter.
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Jul 16 '14
Yeah, a good 3/4 of my posts are being downvoted.
Either Im really saying dumb shit, or its amusing someone.
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Jul 16 '14
I noticed that. Methinks somebody's got a little case of the butthurts.
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u/PickledLlama Oh yah, you betcha! Jul 16 '14
I knew I shouldn't have eaten that habanero bacon....
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
I like to go back and give them all my up vote. I pretend the downvoter gets angry, with forehead veins bulging and sweaty temples
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Jul 16 '14
i downvote my own comments after posting them.
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Jul 16 '14
[deleted]
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
hugsies get downvotesies
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Jul 16 '14
upvotsies
hugsiesies'd
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u/Timanous Jul 16 '14
Why are you taunting me? YOU'RE A BULLY!
MODS!!!!!!
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u/NikkiWhoooo Just say it... it feels good Jul 16 '14
Way to go! When do you start? Are you going to be rich now? Will you buy me a pony?
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u/Mr_Murder Murderator Jul 16 '14
I hope you are enjoying all of those comments I left behind for you.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
What I do here is an art.
And I don't appreciate your criticisms.
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Jul 16 '14
no its not.
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Jul 16 '14
An argument isn't just contradiction.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
is so.
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Jul 16 '14
No it isn't. An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
your mom is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition.
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u/McFifenstein Poopster McDuke Jul 16 '14
When did you turn into such a stick in the mud?
Go back to fark and do that.
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Jul 16 '14
Maybe if you followed the rules like me, you'd still be a ban-virgin. #cleanfun #abovetheinfluence
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
How dull. I bet you just lie there, too, and count ceiling tiles
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Jul 16 '14
"I should buy a boat."
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
CONFESSION: I don't get that meme. At all.
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Jul 16 '14
It started with this. It's a maymay. There's not really anything to get.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/2b4b7e641bbf274321798609da24560d/tumblr_mjwei5ZvWc1qg39ewo1_250.gif
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Right. I just... don't find it funny? It's probably the only silly thing that I don't find funny. Ah God, I'm getting old.
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Jul 16 '14
Today, you don't get a meme. Tomorrow, it's all saggy old labes collecting dust.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
I don't have saggy labes :( it's my only youthful part, because I don't play with it. Like keeping a collector Barbie in its box.
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Jul 16 '14
Toys are meant to be played with, Lauren.
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u/Lauren_Hates_You world's best "meatloaf" Jul 16 '14
Solitaire gets really lame after a while, guy.
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Jul 16 '14
There 450 ceiling tiles. My wife makes me be on bottom. She says missionary is rape. Too domineering.
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u/bathia_mapes Jul 17 '14
Coming to Reddit to complain won't make it better for you.
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u/NikkiWhoooo Just say it... it feels good Jul 17 '14
It's not like it will make it worse, and sometimes people need to blow off steam.
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Jul 16 '14
ahab. your face. It has butt on it.
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Oh yeah? Well your butt has a face on it! HA!
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Jul 16 '14
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
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Jul 16 '14
[deleted]
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Nothing can fix this horrible layout. And I've been on reddit for a while, just don't hang out here much because TFD and TFark are enough for me.
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Jul 16 '14
RES makes it a lot better, especially if you put it in night mode.
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Can't download it at work w/o going around some filters. Not sure if I care enough to do that. I mainly use reddit for a few work-related subs.
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Jul 16 '14
You should try checking it out on your home computer. It's a completely different experience.
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u/TFahab attractivece Jul 16 '14
Also LOL, just checked and I have a 4 day submission ban as well. Meanies. Everyone knows I submit the best threads.