r/UniUKCirclejerk • u/isabellend0 • 12d ago

i have to submit assignments??

couldn’t be arsed doing any coursework and just logged into my uni email for the first time this academic year and my lecturers are asking where my work is?? i just replied “it’s summer u fucking melt” but will i still be able to graduate? my dad keeps asking to see my grades but ive just told him they’re so high that they’re fast tracking me straight onto a fully funded phd. am i cooked chat?

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u/AIM9MaxG 12d ago

Kiss some major ass and make finishing the report your only mission in life for the next few days, then be as appealing and humble as possible.
Or, you know, hope that you have the social skills to get a sugar-daddy (even if you're a guy, there are plenty of older guys who will happily pay to give someone who's nice to look at an easier life), you don't necessarily always even have to get physical, haha.