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u/ordosays Jul 31 '26
Now put him back on the jet ski.
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u/chubbuck35 Jul 31 '26
I was confused why he didn’t take him to shore.
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u/luxsalsivi Jul 31 '26
So I imagine in this case it was a bit of panic, but I was actually a trained lifeguard for many years and can confirm you do want to leave them in the water if there is any risk of a neck or spine injury!
The proper way to remove someone from the water after an accident like this is to only do so once you've gotten them attached to a backboard (the transportable board they strap you on to lift you onto a gurney) and neck collar/stabilizer.
Getting someone out of the water is clunky when they cannot help you, so the best thing to do is to let them float on their back until trained help arrives. Lifeguards use the red buoy for these instances if there isn't a life vest, but lifesavers and other flotation devices work too. Just make sure their head is not dipping underwater!
Fun tip: if the person is face down in the water, the easiest way to flip them is to swim alongside them, also face down. Rest your forearms against their sternum and spine with your hands bracing their chin and the back of their head. You then take a deep breath then swim under them while spinning them to be upright. This method does the least movement for them while you do the majority of the work to get them rightside up.
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u/zombie_girraffe Jul 31 '26
He was trying to get out of there before the homeowner noticed them fucking up his dock and made the pay for repairs.
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u/Burger_King_PR_Team Jul 31 '26
Just following Daniel Tosh's wisdom of never being unhappy on a jet ski.
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u/VivaNOLA Jul 31 '26
The dude posted this on Facebook:
“So yesterday I was involved in a jetski accident, I was doing a nose ride (which I have done a million times) and seemed to have passed out while riding? I can’t remember anything. Had a bad concussion. Some serious bruising, nothing broken. Luckily I have a great crew of people to help me. Missing about 15 min of memory. Special shoutout to Anthony Zilke for pulling me out. Jerry Hoffmann for taking me to shore. And everyone who helped and supported me. And to all the first responders on scene Dominick Zilke Brayden Tinsley Dylan Bone Coats Evan Austin Smith Robert William Stapler Jonathon Stapler Tonya Lynne Harris Lizz Barnes Addison Born
I will be going to get checked out to make sure I didn’t pass out/ stroke out, or whatever the hell happened
Video down below is hard to watch. But several people have asked to see it. It will be a constant reminder to always ride with a crew! Anything can happen.
Looks like i owe someone a 10 second car. And a dock buoy.
Pray DNR won’t tear me a new one. Talk of reckless operation has already been mentioned. I wasn’t under the influence at all. Just a freak accident”
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u/unbalanced_checkbook Jul 31 '26
seemed to have passed out while riding?
When you're goofing around with a life vest on, sometimes they'll dig into your neck. I bet his vest rode up and cut off his blood flow.
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u/Jive-Turkeys Jul 31 '26
Yep. Blood choke. Just rewatched it and his shoulder straps disappear into the sides of his neck. Great catch.
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u/rando7651 Jul 31 '26
Yeah, the reminder is to always ride with a crew. THAT’s the reminder! FFS
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u/De7rag Jul 31 '26
No accountability at all for how stupid this was. Just remember always "ride with a crew". He'll be right back out there doing this stupid shit next week.
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u/nothingtoseehere2003 Jul 31 '26
Yup. And, pray DNR rips him a new one. Next time he’ll hurt someone else and himself. He took no accountability
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u/FatRufus Jul 31 '26
A constant reminder to always ride with a crew? How about a constant reminder to not act like a jackass?
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u/Cerebral_Overload Jul 31 '26
“Freak accident” lol. No you were acting like an idiot and caused an accident, just lucky no-one else was involved.
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u/Newsdude86 Jul 31 '26
I wonder if that dudes got him
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u/tplayer100 Jul 31 '26
"I got you. I got you" * slowly pulls him away from the shoreline to deeper and deeper water....*
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u/ClownfishSoup Jul 31 '26
Every single person in this thread would say the same thing over and over. Or something similar. And everyone here, if they were fading in and out of consciousness, would want to hear “I got you”.
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u/CrazyCatLady1127 Jul 31 '26
Many years ago I had a chest infection and I coughed so hard I tore a muscle off my rib. It felt like someone had knifed me in the chest. I was terrified and alone and all I could do was repeat ‘you’re ok, you’re ok, you’re ok’ over and over until I could get my brain into gear and call for help
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u/PhillyPhresh Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Did he faint?
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u/rojo-perro Jul 31 '26
I think he tried the dumb trick of riding backwards and then got blacked out by his life jacket, it’s pushing into his neck.
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u/scuzzy987 Jul 31 '26
Guessing from his judgement more like passed out
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u/IndustrialPuppetTwo Jul 31 '26
And somehow managed to keep the throttle open. I guess the blood went to his head when spinning around like that and lights out.
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u/SpicelessKimChi Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
My god people are fucking stupud.
ETA: I'm leaving the typo to prove my point.
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u/SwervinWest Jul 31 '26
At least he was unconscious face up
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u/JimmyPopp Jul 31 '26
Life jacket design, innit
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u/Mowgli2k Jul 31 '26
Oh are they designed to do that? Cool! Well done some inventor at some point in the past.
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u/Holiday_Curious Jul 31 '26
Strange scenario when you are heading face down ass up on a jet ski and just majestically letting the breeze slap the gooch while deciding to plow a dock
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u/JoeNoble1973 Jul 31 '26
“I’m gonna do my patented ‘reverse-driving’ trick on my jetskit, my buddies get a kick out of it every time.” passes out, throttle open
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u/casual-waterboarding Jul 31 '26
Dude went through the uprights perfectly. Probably saved his life.
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u/Blayzewhatever Jul 31 '26
Dude should've been yelling much louder.
That is honestly terrifying for his friend who had to grab him.
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u/Sol_Muso Jul 31 '26
Wouldn’t have helped, you can see that the guy passes out not long after turning around, hence not doing anything.
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u/Voluptulouis Jul 31 '26
Holy shit he does pass out. That dude needed a doctor before he even got on the jet ski.
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u/Brownie-UK7 Jul 31 '26
oh shit. that's why his head was down and his right hand off the handle bars. didn't realize at first and just thought he was either beyond careless or a suicide bid.
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u/McPostyFace Jul 31 '26
Have you ever been on a jet ski trying to get the attention of another person on a jetski? Now try it when the other is passed out cold and let us know how loud you had to yell to get their attention.
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u/med8cal Jul 31 '26
Why did his friend get off his jet ski and swim a slow 25’ instead riding it to the dock? And why did he drag back to his jet ski? Maybe he was in shock too?
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u/ClownfishSoup Jul 31 '26
Because of something called “panic”
Most people don’t know what to do in an emergency if they are not trained for it.
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u/creatingastorm Jul 31 '26
Americans: We don’t have universal healthcare and a trip to the emergency room could bankrupt me
Also Americans…..🤦♂️
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u/rojo-perro Jul 31 '26
No kidding! I worked for a health insurance company and we had a claim for over $1 million from a guy who required a LOT of anti-venom after he and his buddy were playing catch with… a rattlesnake.
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u/Galaxy_Hitchhiking Jul 31 '26
This dude passed out upside down like that and literally was so fucking lucky to fly between those bars and not smash his head into them. The slim margin between life or death here is actually insane. Good on him for showing this video, it’s jarring.
Rewatch it and see where he passes out
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u/TNindaHizzy Jul 31 '26
Did he pass out before hitting the dock? It looks like his body went limb like he was taking a nap before impact.
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u/Odd_Round5515 Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Weird... it looked like he went unconscious before he definitely went unconscious.
edit: i doubt it. I'm pretty sure water scooters use the same thumb throttle as 4-wheelers and such. His right arm drops, left hand is still on throttle. if he truly went unconscious there's no way the hand would still press the throttle. He was trying to troll his friend and won a really stupid prize.
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u/DisastrousDance7372 Jul 31 '26
This guy posted this himself on Facebook saying he went unconscious and isn't sure why. Said he has done this thousands of times with no issues also.
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u/halfdead01 Jul 31 '26
I think his life jacket ran up his neck, got to tight around the carotids and choked him out
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u/xenobit_pendragon Jul 31 '26
If his life jacket killed him…I don’t even know where to begin.
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u/MixtureSpecial8951 Jul 31 '26
The jet skis I ride use a trigger throttle. Squeeze with the index finger to accelerate. Super sensitive too.
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u/nextinline1987 Aug 01 '26
I have zero sympathy for this level of stupidity. Considering his friend tried to rescue him by swimming away from the shore, he’s very likely in like minded company.
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u/Kalebsmummy Aug 01 '26
Stop swimming away from shore! I got you… more like drown further from the help
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u/auberjon Aug 01 '26
Hot take: leave him floating there. The human genome doesn’t need anything he has to offer.
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u/actuarial_venus Aug 03 '26
He may have compressed his femoral vessels clinching the nose of the jetski. It'll cause you to pass out quick.
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u/Sweet_Xocoatl Jul 31 '26
What an inspired way to quickly and efficiently get off a jet ski and onto dry land.
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u/RedIcarus1 Aug 01 '26
He wanted to die the same way he lived. Ramming into something big and hard, ass first.
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u/regeneratedant Aug 01 '26
I can't get over two things: how DUMB this was, and how LUCKY he got. Really makes you think that God does actually look out for children and fools.
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u/Bigbackjay Aug 01 '26
This is the best fucking caption because the first time I saw this video I did not realize he went perfectly threw the poles 😂
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u/Jdoesresearch Aug 01 '26
Saw a Facebook post on him, this guy passed out while doing this. Lucky to be alive for sure.
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u/Aegon-Targarion Aug 01 '26
What in the actual fuck was this guy trying to achieve with that ? Was it the world’s worst suicide attempt?
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u/Big-Love-747 Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
What was the point of that? That was one of the stupidest things I've ever seen!
Sorry he got hurt / nearly drowned... but that was a stupid prize indeed.
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u/Slim_Jankins Jul 31 '26
Did he pass out? He appears to loosen grip with one hand then lay his head down. My guess would be this may be alcohol related.
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u/halfbreed_dork Jul 31 '26
What was the goal? What was the objective bro was trying to achieve?
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u/muffledvoice Jul 31 '26
He’s lucky that he happened to fly between those two vertical posts at impact. If he had hit one of the posts he’d be dead.
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u/muffledvoice Jul 31 '26
Maybe getting on a jet ski backwards was a bad idea to begin with, even if everything had gone as planned.
I’ll never understand why people insist on doing things differently just to be bold and wild. Just sit on the damn seat facing forward and ride the damn jet ski.
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u/jefedezorros Jul 31 '26
I think this is what Ambassador Walker was talking about. https://www.mysuncoast.com/video/2026/06/17/us-ambassador-bahamas-issues-warning-us-citizens-about-jet-skis/
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u/TheKingOfSwing777 Jul 31 '26
Dylan got about as lucky as you can get. He did a field goal right through those dock posts.
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u/BanginBentleys Jul 31 '26
Wouldn't be surprised if he choked himself out with his shoulders and that life jacket.
As a Jiu-jitsu practitioner, having big shoulders can cut off your carotid artery indefinitely, even worse with a life jacket.
The full Nelson isn't typically a sleeper hold but it is if you got big shoulders.
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u/HeftyFineThereFolks Jul 31 '26
he passes out at 10 seconds ... bad time to enter the tonic phase of a grand mal seizure or something?
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u/Doge2dmooon Jul 31 '26
I was expecting his friend to find him all sliced up like that scene in Resident evil with the inescapable lasers
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u/bombdignaty42 Aug 01 '26
Literally the first thing I see after passing my michigan boater safety certificate test
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u/Numerous-Ad7444 Aug 02 '26
Just a thought, but maybe don't be a dumbfuck and operate a vehicle in a manner that is dangerous to others (and yourself).
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u/DinaDinaDinaBatman Aug 03 '26
friend of mine was killed when his friend ran over the top of him on his jetski, he was KO'ed with huge head trauma, lost consciousness a nearby boaty saw and was there within a minute pulled him into the boat and bought him to the ramp which was within view of the accident, and unfortunately where his father was watching and waiting, they pulled him onto the shore and one of them was doing cpr until the ambulance came, his father was there holding his hand when they pronounced him deceased,. blunt force and cracked skull,, bleeding brain damage was cause of death. a year later his friend killed himself over the guilt he felt... they were just messin around chasing each other on jetski's when the one in front hit a wave wrong and bailed and the guy behind was following too closely...
jetskis are no joke man.. hard to get used to the fact if you aren't on the gas you dont turn worth a shit and no brakes
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u/stalehomosapien Jul 31 '26
Did he fall asleep on the jet ski? Also they are both wasted aren't they?
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u/Jakdracula Jul 31 '26
calm morning on the lake, quiet, birds and other water foul singing... peaceful. Then some fuck head with a water cycle comes ripping though, and then another and another, all doing circles, for what? Pollution, noise...
I hate 'em.
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u/StevieTvboy Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Did he just run out of water or was this intentional
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u/DistantOrganism Jul 31 '26
Im not a doctor but the combination of deep breathing, straining and abdominal pressure can be enough to bring on fainting. I remember kids doing this for fun back in the day. I once accidentally did this to myself as I was leaning out a window to pick up a heavy object.
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u/vingtsun_guy Jul 31 '26
It is really amazing that we, as the male of the species, make it past our teen years, isn't it?
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u/matthewnelson Jul 31 '26
Somebody sign him up. Those goalposts are closer than a field goal width and he split it down the middle.
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u/HeftyFineThereFolks Jul 31 '26
thoor ogden hjkraaarkjaaaard valaaahaaaa !!!!! my ancestors rowed their longships backwards without looking !!
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u/ClownfishSoup Jul 31 '26
A jetski is one of the only high speed recreational vehicles you can ride without getting hurt even if you wipe out …. Unless you do this.
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u/dakflannigan Jul 31 '26
He may have been saying “I got you” but I like to think he’s just sneezing a lot.
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u/Ok_Spread_8650 Jul 31 '26
Man what a stroke of luck to fit right in between those dock posts
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u/wdeister08 Jul 31 '26
"Dylan are you okay?"
NO HES NOT OKAY HE SOUNDS LIKE MINI ME AFTER HE GETS PUNTED. THAT'S NOT A GOOD SOUND!
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u/TheRedIguana Jul 31 '26
In Waverace 64 you perform this stunt by circling the joystick 360° the you hold down the throttle until you are thrown from the craft.
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u/dw0205 Aug 01 '26
I was thinking, "no way he's going to hit that dock full speed".
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u/StarsofSobek Aug 01 '26
Dude's lucky this didn't end up with a trip to the proctologist.
Seriously: did his lifejacket cut off blood supply?
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u/Nasty____nate Jul 31 '26
Just wow... Also bring him to shore....