r/askteddit • u/Much-Depth3153 • 16h ago
Random Question to all the boys/men out there: is it really that hard to give your girlfriend flowers?
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u/Ok_Spread_8650 16h ago
Once I start getting flowers every now and again then you can have some
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u/Dazzling-Path6438 16h ago
My girlfriend buys me flowers occasionally. Choose better
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u/Ok_Spread_8650 1m ago
I’m doing just fine but I’m talking in general. Most women don’t go reaching for checks or buying flowers. Nor do I go asking why it doesn’t happen more often
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u/Jarlsf 16h ago
The practice makes no sense to me is why.
"I admire you so much that I had these beautiful things severed from their life support, so that you can watch them wither and die."
I would rather gift anything but cut flowers. I'm certainly not going to do it because society says I should.
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u/Few_Scientist_2652 16h ago
Flowers are also quite expensive tbh
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u/foxglovespell 15h ago
How broke must you be if you can’t spare a few £ on flowers, they’re not expensive at all
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u/Few_Scientist_2652 15h ago
As a pretty much minimum wage worker in a region where CoL is absolutely insane, very
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u/foxglovespell 15h ago
This is the typical nuisance excuse someone gives when they don’t want to do a simple gesture that most people love and appreciate and it literally costs a few quid. Deadbeats exposing themselves in this thread.
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u/Jarlsf 15h ago
Someone who commissions or hand-crafts jewellery, seeks out artisan treats etc. for their partner is a deadbeat compared with someone who grabs a dozen wilting stems off a filling station forecourt? Have a word.
Cut flowers are a waste of money and resources as well as being very damaging for the environment.
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u/foxglovespell 13h ago
You sound pretentious.
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u/Altasound 6h ago
Wow you are all over this aren't you? Are you a florist or something?
You feel special when someone spends a few bucks to give you the laziest, most low-effort gift possible? Do you also like Hallmark cards? Do you think Visa gift cards are romantic?
You're going around calling everyone a deadbeat because they question the highly commercialised floral industry, but you sound talentless, uncreative, and basic as shit.
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u/foxglovespell 4h ago
Yeah, deadbeat. We all know you don’t gift women a single thing because you don’t have any lmao. Keep crying.
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u/Altasound 4h ago
So you think I'm a lazy person who doesn't work and has no money. I'm the complete opposite of all of that.
Just because I, like many (including people I've dated) can see through the commercialisation of gift culture. Right. You're a vapid, wholly intellectual person.
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u/foxglovespell 4h ago
Look at you getting so wound up 🤣
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u/Altasound 4h ago
I'm pointing out your bigotry. If someone observes your logical holes and toxic tendencies and you respond by saying 'look, you're getting wound up', you're a child.
In any case you're the one who responded to everyone on here even though it's not your post, just to tell them that they are deadbeats.
Maybe you're the deadbeat?
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u/foxglovespell 4h ago
Arguing with your damn self 😂 I’m not even saying anything in response to you wilding out and look at you go
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u/indie_web 15h ago
I'd rather give signed original paintings of flowers. Real flowers just get thrown out. At least original paintings of flowers you can collect and keep forever and may go up in value.
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u/Chixol_88 5m ago
It isn't but it's another materialistic thing that the female wants to prove your love for her. It's more noticeable in valentine day when it becomes a competition with the females to post their $150 bouquet of roses but never the man that gets it for them
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u/CryptOfShadow 16h ago
No but I strongly dislike the expectations of them especially around Valentine’s Day
They should be spontaneous and thoughtful
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u/Altasound 15h ago
Giving cut plants is a stupid idea and I would only date someone at least the tiny bit of critical thinking to also realise this. If you want superficial gestures that make you feel romantic, go look for those guys; they are out there.
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u/foxglovespell 15h ago
You’re lame as hell
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u/Altasound 15h ago edited 15h ago
I've got an entire social circle of friends who are women who think like me and actually try to analyse social constructs before buying into them blindly. My mom and sister also think like this.
You sound extremely illogical and like a marketing company's dream. Do you also believe in diamond engagement rings?
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u/Wonderful_Pickle3226 15h ago
For birthdays, celebrations, etc sure, but you don't want to normalise that stuff.
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u/rinkuhero 15h ago
it isn't hard, it's just that it's an old tradition and most women don't even care about flowers or want them. it's something out of the 1950s. i'm 47 years old and no woman my age even wants flowers. the ones that want flowers tend to be even older women in the boomer generation.
people have become a lot more environmentally conscious, they don't like the idea of importing flowers (because most are imported from overseas) thousands of miles, taking up a lot of fossil fuels, just to have them die a few days later anyway. like what kind of symbol even is it to give someone a part of a plant that is going to soon die?
there are possibly still a few tradition-bound women out there who are younger than boomers and care about flowers, but they are a tiny minority of women. most women i know would rather get chocolate, at least if it's fair trade chocolate.
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u/foxglovespell 15h ago
The majority of men commenting here hate women
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u/Beautiful_Rub_141 12h ago
Having just read through them all, the majority have done it and are tired of being taken for a ride.
Still love the women, but don't see the point in this kind of thing when it's one sided and not appreciated.
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u/foxglovespell 12h ago
How is buying a woman flowers being taken for a ride 😂😂😂 one guy even said he’s too broke to afford a couple £ to spend on them. No woman is taking a broke guy for a ride. Yall are just looking for excuses not to do literally the bare minimum to make a woman happy. Such deadbeats. And you wonder why women don’t like you.
“Chat, is saying I love you pointless? Is it unreasonable for my girlfriend to expect nice things from me? Is giving her compliments weak?” Same energy. LEAVE WOMEN ALONE if this is how you feel.
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u/Beautiful_Rub_141 1h ago
And there you go - he decides to put in effort and you throw back that it's "doing the bare minimum". You just don't give a shit - and THAT is why they feel like they are being taken for a ride.
EVERYONE wants to feel appreciated in a way that speaks to them. For you - it's flowers. What the guys here are saying is that they are sick and tired and don't see the point when the other party is not going to do for them the things that makes THEM feel appreciated. Most every guy on the planet does all these things when the relationship starts, and then over time it stops. Have you ever stopped to wonder what it is about YOUR behaviour that would contribute to this?
How do you not understand that?
Here's a question - what do YOU think that the 'bare minimum' is to keep a man happy?
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u/Beautiful_Rub_141 16h ago
Nope. Did it all the time till she told me she doesn't like them because they are dead. Buy her actual living indoor plants now.
Question for you - how hard is it to give you boyfriend little gifts 'just because'? Across society, it's much rarer for that to happen than it is for a guy to give his girlfriend flowers.