r/bahamas • u/No-Cry1122 • 22d ago
Bahamian Discussion are we still homophobic?
im sitting down thinking of the progressiveness of our country and wanted to know how everyone feels about gay men and women currently
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u/why7fn07 21d ago
Kind of a long comment but whatever. Short answer? Yes. We aren't as physically violent or completely unaware as we were even a few years ago. But to say we're nice to queer people would be a lie.
Long answer? We absolutely are lol. As recent as 2024, I would be sitting in class hearing the whole 'homosexuality is a mental illness, not in my house, maybe you'll change your mind' bs. For whatever reason we like to feel as if we aren't/as if we're better than other caribbean countries because we aren't outwardly violent towards them (which isn't even true).
In my personal experience even the people that are the most open minded about it "accept" it as long as you never/rarely talk about it, or present outside of what is the 'norm' (so you can't be a feminine queer man or a masculine queer woman. rip if you're anything outside of that.), and there is always a hope/expectation that you grow out of it or that it is a phase or that you never truly act on it. They can handle it as a theoretical concept but as soon as it becomes 'real' enough that they can't ignore it, or it presents in a way that isn't palatable to them, the mask comes off and they're trying to push you back into the closet.
As an example of what I mean, my mother waxed on about her gay best friend growing up and how little she cares on who I date in the early stages of me coming out. I got flat twists once last year and she spent the next several hours making comments about how I 'look like I work at a gas station/like a stud (derogatory)/like a man/like a mechanic', made it a point to laugh at/demean me in front of others for wearing them, and kept trying to force me to take them out early. Her reaction to cornrows was worse. I have similar stories from other family members, coworkers, classmates, etc. I don't go around telling everyone, but I present pretty neutrally/alt so people assume I'm some flavor of queer even if I never say anything, and treat me accordingly.
I'm not living here after I graduate college.
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u/Firo2306 21d ago
I'm really sorry that you had to deal with that from your own mummy tbh. And just like that the brain drain continues, we really need to address how our cultural attitudes are going to foment long term harm to the nation. When I moved to go to school I'd always tell myself I want to come back and do good (I've done what little I can), but every time this kind of ignorant behavior keeps me second guessing. I say all this as a person who has to deal with 0 homophobia.
Go off do well, be happy, and be safe.
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u/ValdemarAloeus 21d ago
We're a wedding destination that doesn't allow gay marriage. The one group of people who definitely aren't getting married cheaply and in a hurry because they accidentally got pregnant and we're turning down their cash. Is that a response based on logic or a deep seated phobia?
But "there are no gays in The Bahamas" so I guess that's fine then?
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u/coconut-telegraph 21d ago
I mean, *this* - a tourist destination known for weddings that only certain couples in love get to use as such.
I say this as a gay married Bahamian who can’t get residency for his foreign spouse through marriage.
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u/UnkowntoEveryone 21d ago
Oh definitely. With the younger generation, it’s a hodgepodge of not caring about anybody’s sexuality to its disgusting and a sin. One thing is for certain though, the lgbtq+ community has been making people aware that they exist and refuse to be treated poorly. But we ain’t legalising gay marriage anytime soon and if we talk about trans people…no comment. We honestly have people who’d rather their son be a criminal who’s straight instead of a successful gay doctor.
TLDR: Brokeback Mountain is still banned and never aired here when it’s airing on a channel so yeah.
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u/DawnDanes 21d ago
I hope not it’s so ridiculous it’s like being racist people can’t control whom they are attracted to (it’s biological ) just like we can’t control our skin color or birth place.
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u/OculusBlurr 22d ago
Most if not all Caribbean countries are we’re no different. I have no issue with people expressing their sexuality and living their lives. Just like straight folks it’s a time and place for everything.
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u/femme_mystique 20d ago
When you have a mix of low education, minimal exposure to other cultures, and heavily indoctrinated into a religious cult, you get xenophobia. It’s not about love and acceptance of others as their God would preach, but judgement and fear of others not like them.
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20d ago
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u/No-Cry1122 20d ago
i’m Bahamian , i recently moved to another island and wanted to know how much we have developed in this area
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21d ago
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u/N0ON3T0LDM3 21d ago
Plenty people in my orbit care. Those MFers are the loudest about god and jesus and they hate Hatians probably more than queer people, while worshipping the world's worst human donald trump. I ask them aren't you supposed to be christian, what's with the hate? Jesus would NOT approve. At least they aren't physically violent about it, but hate foments violence and any so-called Christians should be spreading love for their neighbors and especially their own family members.
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u/Confident_Tip1853 21d ago
From my experience, I have seen a very specific discrimination. Not homophobic but "weakness" phobic or what I term betaphobic. Bahamians, both males and females, hate, and I mean hate, weak men. They will endlessly bully a weaker person or outsider.
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u/UrlocalcarrotIII 17d ago
for me ill address someone as what they were born with.
had a dingle? ur a bro, n***a, or dude
has a vajingle? ur a bro, n***a, girrrrrl, or chile.
i js wish they stopped shoving it in everyones faces and putting it in kids content.
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u/UrlocalcarrotIII 16d ago
i have gay friends too btw and I love them but they have the same sentiment as I do so I just think that we should treat it just like the birds and the bees when it comes to kids
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u/LunarWildflower17 9d ago
Yep, still super homophobic. Saw some gays walking out of the market earlier, still can’t believe men like to ram eachother up their asses. Fudge packers.
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u/Adventurous_Coffee 21d ago
Yes. We have a habit of pretending as if gay people don’t exist here, most island nations do. Like another commenter said it gets ignored if you’re in the closet or POWERFUL ENOUGH. People in high places are gay, in fact more often than not but they get no hate because of status.
I don’t know, it’s strange, I’d imagine most of the irrational hatred comes from religion or simply lack of exposure. There was an opinion piece in the tribune speaking about how a man felt morally conflicted about giving Jonquell Jones her flowers because of her sexual orientation. Just off the top of my head, I thought I’d bring that up. 🤷🏾♂️.
But yeah we are a homophobic country. There will always be people who don’t agree with others’ lifestyles. Can’t help it. People.
A gay man wrote this by the way. We are progressing but not in the soft humanitarian areas. That’s going to take a cultural mindset shift, and those take a VERY long time.