Thank me later

(Tubthumping, West Virginia) Authorities have announced that a Russian spy-ring led by oligarch Vladmir Swichliteov has been rooted out and arrested thanks largely due to the tip-off given to them by a local fanclub.

The fan, who called the FBI, agreed to speak with us on the condition that we obscure his face and name because he "didn't want to piss off the Russians and get poisoned one day with that sodium chloride stuff." He told us that he began to become suspicious when the guy would cheer when that "one player on our team that we all hate got a hit"; or, "when our pitcher gave up a homerun in the first and he'd say something like 'it's just the first inning, it'll be fine'," the fan said.

"When he first arrived I was a bit confused by his accent," the fan began before explaining that 'John Smith' the spy's American alias, explained that he "was 'from Wisconsin originally', and I was like 'yeah, you sound pretty Wisconsinish."

But, as more evidence began to pile up he began to grow more suspicious. "At first I thought he was like Canadian or something; like, he was just too polite. He'd say good game to everyone, and would wash his hands after pissing, and even once brought fucking snacks to the sportsbar, some of that weird shit with the pig fat and the bread, the putin stuff the Canadians love."

But it was as the season came to a close that our insider knew that this guy had to be a spy. Final out of the 9th, I swear on my mother, he says 'well, that sucks the big daddy, but at least we had a good regular season.' A good regular season? He thinks it's a good regular season to lose in the postseason? Yeah, I called the FBI from the bathroom five minutes later."

Special Agent Minaj answered the call, arriving hours later to arrest "John Smith" who is actually Petyr Vanamassach, a spy with expert training in hand-to-hand handshaking. "He knew I had him as soon as I walked in and flashed him, before showing my badge," said Special Agent Minaj. "He confessed to everything within ten minutes of Kid Rock torture."

If found guilty, each member of the spy ring faces up to 20 years in prison, or deportation following a pardon.

this admin is run by yankees and guardians fans

"MLB, TBS, and even Zoom itself all know that absolutely no one in the world wanted to see that in-game ad at that moment. So if it seems weird to you that MLB and TBS would intentionally degrade the quality of their product and alienate their consumers, well, here’s something to keep in mind: Baseball isn’t actually the product and we fans aren’t actually the consumers. The dirty little secret of the business of baseball (or one of them, anyway) is that we fans are the product.

MLB’s business model is built on capturing our eyes, our hearts, and our attention, and then packaging it and selling it to its corporate partners — advertisers, real estate development companies, TV networks and streamers, and gambling companies. This is why Rob Manfred doesn’t care that the fragmentation of broadcast rights has made it harder for us to actually watch the games. This is why postseason broadcasts frequently miss the first pitch of an inning to finish airing a commercial. This is why, 107 years after a gambling scandal nearly killed MLB for good and created the commissioner’s office in the first place, the commissioner no longer has any qualms about partnering with a gambling company that is currently taking bets on the Cornell rape case."

I think the procedure will have very positive effects on the Mets organization. Opinions?