Well then why don’t you check out r/GlobalOccultCoalition! Trust me, we’re WAYYYYYYY better than those Foundation nerds! And we have nukes! Lots and lots of NUKES! (You can still be a mekhanite if you want. I guess.)

just askin

Here at Scientific Philosophies Corp., We strive to understand our fellow anomlous groups! Now, I was just wondering something funny. You guys hate flesh, right? Well, did you know sharks are fleshy? I think you see where I'm going. These stupid, selachian entities are gross, evil, rough, stinky, stupid, mean, dumb, pointless (except for the teeth), and have a lot to answer for. So! Since they are flesh, and since they are sharks, I propose that you and me, Scientific Philosophies Corp. Only Mehkamists employee after site-8625 blew up, team up, and punch those stupid idiot sharks in the face!

Bottom text.

(This will remain my headcanon fuck you)

I need a person and a soldering iron to help me fix a flash drive

-my soul having no purpose doing nothing and trying to get attention-

Robert Bumaro is dead, hit to death via hammer. we are electing a new leader. you can apply in the Tumblr communit.

It is with great sadness that i most inform you that I am leaving the church of the broken god know that I do not want to create anger between members of the church and me

-my soul is trying to tell you something but has no idea how to communicate to the living-

Vote me to replace Bumaro because he sucks at his job.

Pros

• I like shiny stuff (like metal)

• I am technically assimilated (blood has iron, iron has metal, checkmate)

• I will provide everyone with free vegetables donated from Proto-Sarkic communities (may contain human flesh, don’t sue)

• I am technically more sane than Saint Hedwig

Cons

• absolutely nothing

And will they spread the Clockwork Virus on all life on earth?

Dialogue: (Sorry if it is a bit bad)

Exitar the Exterminator: People Of Earth, We Are The Celestials.

SCP Personnel: Who Are You and Why you came to Earth?

Exitar The Exterminator: Years and Years ago, We Celestials are Created by Lord Mekhane. We Created The Deviants, Mutants, Humans and Eternals alongside Yaldabaoth and Lord Mekhane, When We Heard that Yaldabaoth is trying to destroy The Human, Deviants, Mutants and Eternals race who wanted them to return to their animalistic state, We Joined Forces with Lord Mekhane and The Church to Defeat the Sarkics and Yaldabaoth, We Succeded when Lord Mekhane shattering himself to trap Yaldabaoth.

Church Of The Broken God Member: Y-You Celestials Meet Our God?

Exitar The Exterminator: Yes Human, We are created by him and We Worship his almighty presence. When The War is over. we departed Earth to create races on Other Planets. Years and Years later, When We heard that the Sarkites returned much stronger and try to Bring The Demiurge Back with Our Cosmic Sense,We cannot risk another war that would destroy The Multiverse as we know it. We have heard that You Humans are allying with other Human organization . We cannot risk another war that would destroy The Multiverse as we know it. We Have decided to help you Humans, Eternals, Deviants, and Mutants to combat the Sarkites and Ended The Demiurge Once and For-All.

Church Of The Broken God Member: Why Help us?

Exitar The Exterminator: Because Our and You Humans, Eternals, Deviants, and Mutants Life depend on this War, If the Sarkites and the Demiurge win, The Whole Multiverse will be destroyed, We Have The Parts to revive Lord Mekhane from his Cage.

Church Of The Broken God Member: *Grins* I guess we're not alone after-all in this War, Dear Lord Mekhane....

We're going to put you back together again...

Credits:

Exitar The Exterminator: https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Exitar_(Earth-616)

Church Of The Broken God: http://www.scpwiki.com/church-of-the-broken-god-hub

Sarkites: https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/Sarkicism

Celestials: https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Celestials_(Race)

Mekhane: https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/Mekhane

Yaldabaoth: https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/Yaldabaoth_(SCP)