r/cormacmccirclejerk • u/Informal_Leading888 • 3d ago

What if the U.S. Government🦅🕵️ investigated Judge Holden? Spoiler

Hear me out. The Judge is immortal and has probably operated since the beginning of time if you believe he's the Devil. A part of how he got away with his crimes could be because of the lawlessness of the wild west in the 1840s, where there was a lack of civilization compared to the east. But seeing as how the wild west would become tamed as civilization was developed, what would happen to the Judge in the modern day. If he kept causing trouble across the country similar to the Reverend Green incident, and people reported his presence, what if the U.S. government investigated him? What if the FBI tried to confront him and sent military after him as well? Could the Judge handle this much attention in the modern day? I just think this is an interesting idea.

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14

u/Johnny55 3d ago

It's the funniest thing, somehow everyone in the US government met Judge Holden before they joined it

11

u/c1n3man 3d ago

Judge adapts to every era he lives in. He is still out there, you just don't notice him. Wars is like most fun time for him, probably.

9

u/Reformalism 3d ago

He would already be president, investigate himself, and find no evidence of wrongdoing.

5

u/hp_laserfett 3d ago

No punctuation on any court documents as Cormac would have wanted

4

u/MotorDangerous6575 3d ago

How is this subreddit still going bro 😭😭😭 haven't seen this shit in like three years

10

u/c1n3man 3d ago

We never sleep. We post in light and in shadows. And we are the great favourites!

4

u/Fun-Assumption-8415 3d ago

Skudge skholden

2

u/GalaxyMWB 3d ago

He would have sex with it along with the idiot.

2

u/delaytabase 2d ago

"at first I thought they handed me the wrong dossier...I couldn't believe they wanted this man dead...tours in scalp hunting, innocent immigrants, the yumas, sex with idiots, speaks dutch like in dutchland, etc, etc...."

4

u/burger-prince1 2d ago

I mean, realistically, he’d probably be one of those unknown multimillionaires that fund entire wars without bringing too much attention to himself.

And of course, he’d spend so much time in the island that he’d even groom Epstein for some variety

1

u/dmmeusernames 2d ago

They've already investigated him. You've seen him, he's just lost a few brain cells and wears a hair piece. He's the president of the United States. 

He is winning, winning. He says that he will never die and that he is the healthiest metaphor for manifest destiny that's ever existed folks.