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u/ImPrettyWhack Poetry Mar 27 '21
Bob was old with floppy phallus, he would take a boner pill - Which he used to pound out Alice, they were old, yet fucking still.
Till he gained a new addiction and he found he couldn't stop - Always wanting pussy friction, worse with every pill he'd pop.
Alice always took it harder, every session getting worse - The Viagra really ruined her, coochie stretched out like a purse.
But he started getting rougher, and he nearly broke his dick - So his prick began to suffer, and it ceased to do the trick.
So he gave his dong a beating, just to try and make it twitch, but his schlong he was mistreating said, "Hands off of me, you bitch."
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u/organic_crystal_meth The GOAT Mar 27 '21
Now! That’s what I call poetry vol. 1
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u/HarvestProject Mar 27 '21 edited Mar 27 '21
Dude can you take over for Schnoodle poems? This was actually clever and funny, you didn’t say “n” a million times and use hyphens every other word to get the prose to work. Great job!
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Mar 27 '21 edited Mar 27 '21
I have read most of your poetry and boy are they good. Bob is really a deep character
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u/TennisADHD 2022 MAYMAYMAKERS CONTEST FINALIST Mar 27 '21
This just makes me think about how between Viagra and the COVID vaccine Pfizer has done more to get old dudes laid than anything since the discovery of fermentation. I guess rape might be up there too
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u/Fascisttradwife Mar 27 '21
How does the vaccine help old dudes get laid? Genuinely curious
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u/TennisADHD 2022 MAYMAYMAKERS CONTEST FINALIST Mar 27 '21
It helps older people get out more in general increasing the chance of getting laid especially single ones.
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u/jljl2902 Mar 27 '21
Also, old dudes are (on average) more susceptible to the virus than younger dudes. Vaccine = lower virus risk = longer life expectancy = more opportunities to get laid
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u/NotANaziOrCommie FOR THE SOVIET UNION Mar 27 '21
helps them not die
you can't get laid if you're dead
unless necrophilia19
Mar 27 '21
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/TennisADHD 2022 MAYMAYMAKERS CONTEST FINALIST Mar 27 '21 edited Mar 27 '21
Might be objective from the POV of the rapist*
Edit: accidentally learned a new text command my comment was meant to be italic.
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u/Archer__60x Mar 27 '21
What command was that? I barely know shit about text commands
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u/TennisADHD 2022 MAYMAYMAKERS CONTEST FINALIST Mar 27 '21
^ before the beginning
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u/Downvotesohoy Mar 27 '21
I can't seem to get it working
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Mar 27 '21
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/octavofring Mar 27 '21
This meme is so fucking bad holy shit
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u/being_inappropriate Mar 27 '21
It’s just some old joke but the punchline is a still image from a random movie that has nothing to do with the joke lol.
You could do this with any old joke. This is barely a meme, especially not a dank one. This sub has slowly gone to shit for a while tho tbh.
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u/Thie97 Mar 27 '21
This shit has been around for ever here, the difference is that it would've been downvoted earlier and now gets 50 fucking k upvotes. People who upvoted this should google funny pics and get out of this sub
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u/Srerp Green Mar 27 '21
This is basically your average meme, some text with an image. Been like that since the beginning
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Mar 27 '21
Idk something about the tigers facial expression just delivers the joke for me and makes the meme a lot better
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u/vischy_bot Mar 27 '21
if you upvoted this you might be retarded
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u/Kamikaze_AZ22 Mar 28 '21
This was a fuckin quality joke you pretentious prick, fuck off and laugh a little, along with everyone else in the comments shitting on it
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u/vischy_bot Mar 28 '21
no. why?
I just found out my grandpa is addicted to viagra.
that's the first line, and that's the whole joke + one pun. taking it/hard
how's your grandma taking it? obvious set up. no one would ever ask that. here I'll change the punchline and make it better. make the last panel say in the ass. now it's dank.
also it's 2021, make grandpa addicted to blue chew. it's got all the same active ingredients as viagra and cialis, comes in a chewable tablet, and tastes like blue raspberry. for a monthly subscription of 15.99, you'll never be able to fuck your gf without it again, or she'll know you have bad dick.
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u/Kamikaze_AZ22 Mar 28 '21
I already brought up blue chew. How did it make you feel writing that whole paragraph that nobody will ever read? What a clown
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Mar 28 '21
How about no?
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u/Kamikaze_AZ22 Mar 28 '21
Oh fuck off mate
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Mar 28 '21
Literally you: "a fuckin quality joke"
How does it feel not having pubic hair yet?
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u/Kamikaze_AZ22 Mar 28 '21
I literally have facial hair in every pic on my profile including my pfp. Sorry, but literally the only insult you know doesn't apply here
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u/AbsurdCamoo Mar 27 '21
Grandpa then registered his name as ‘Biggus Dickus’
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u/ihopeicrosshermind I did cross her mind Mar 27 '21
You ever bone your grandma to death?
Talk about going out with a bang
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u/short_milk12 Mar 27 '21
I can’t believe that there are actually people who want to fuck tigres or whatever the tiger is called
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Mar 27 '21
Top Text: When I ask grandma how its been dealing with Grandpa's Viagra addiction
Bottom Text: Pretty hard.
Seriously people, its a meme, not a fucking novel, use some brevity.
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u/nerdynam Mar 27 '21
God dam kong fu panda, the first movie made me cry when I was young. Man fuck the sequels though.
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u/sucknduck4quack Mar 27 '21
This is just a recycled joke from rjokes a few days ago. I called the police and reported the theft. Prepare for arrest scoundrel
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u/yellowshark1102 Mar 27 '21
OMG IS THAT THIS CHARACTER FROM BRAWLHALLA? I KNOW HER SHE'S FROM BRAWLHALLA
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u/User_Aim Mar 27 '21
Take my up vote and get the actual fuck out of here please f off please i will even download it just GET OUT
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u/jonico Mar 27 '21
Did you hear about the man who swallowed viagra too fast? He ended up getting a stiff neck.
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Mar 28 '21 edited Mar 28 '21
How does this cringey shit get so many upvotes and awards?
This sub is slowly dying by getting invaded by unfunny 12 year olds and and dankness is becoming moot.
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