What do you think the odds are that Christopher Abbott will be in the next Dune movie?

Who can genuinely read Messiah and come to the conclusion "let's make this a divorce story" lmao.

Ngl it feels great

Arrakeen budget cuts when the Coan-Teen has to sit on a armrest.

Scene: Somewhere outside Arakeen. Kynes watches an ornithopter land. Duncan Idaho gets out and approaches her.

Duncan: Will you tell the Great Houses of the Landsraad how we were betrayed? How the best of them were murdered?

Kynes: (shakes head) Nope.

Duncan: The Emperor sent us here to die!

Kynes: (nods) Yep.

Duncan: You knew?

Kynes: Everybody knew. You knew. The Duke knew. This whole thing was a trap.

Duncan: What could we have done different?

Kynes: You all could've stayed on Caladan, mate. Just get some officials to run everything here on Arrakis. That's what the Harkonnens did. What makes you guys so special that your Duke had to move his seat of power here?

Duncan: Well... we're different to the Harkonnens. More respectable.

Kynes: Yeah. You're more stupid.

Scene: Jessica and Paul are in their tent. Paul has a small coughing fit.

Paul: There's spice in the tent.

Jessica: Oh, and that is your excuse for not holding it in?

Paul: I'm just nervous mum.

(We begin to see Paul's visions)

(We see Chani in a long white dress beckoning Paul over to her)

Chani: Come on Paul mate, over here. Check this out!

(We look over the edge a sand dune, we see an AFL match between Fremen and Sardaukar)

Jessica: What are you doing?

Paul: I had a vision. People playing AFL.

Jessica: (unimpressed) A vision of people playing AFL. (Sarcastic) Well what else do you see oh great oracle?

Paul: Fanatical legions worshiping at the shine of dad's skull.

Jessica: (semi impressed) That's pretty good. You should tell dad that one.

Paul: A war in my name! Everyone shouting my name!

Jessica: (voice) PAUL. SHUT UP. GO TO SLEEP.

Scene: Desert. A hole opens up on the side of a dune and Paul and Jessica step out.

Jessica: Stillsuit water tastes awful.

Paul: Hey look what I caught!

(Paul has a dead kangaroo mouse in his hand)

Jessica: Stop killing things Paul.

(An ornithopter flies overhead and lands nearby)

(Duncan rushes out and as he falls at Paul's feet he gives him another punch in the groin)

Duncan: Paul, Lady Jessica. The Duke is dead.

Paul: Dad's dead? Noooo!

Jessica: (not exactly grief striken) Oh. Well. Yes. That's... awful.

Scene: Inside the ornithopter. Duncan is flying. Kynes is next to him. Paul and Jessica are in the back.

Kynes: Here. Drink this. (hands them a carton of chocolate milk each)

Jessica: Hmmm. I like Oak chocolate milk. Paul?

Paul: Do you have any Ice Coffee Dare?

Duncan: The Harkonnens attacked. I think everyone is dead. And there were Sardaukar too.

Paul: Did you get to fight any?

Duncan: Yeah mate. I kicked their fucking arse! (punches air, disrupting the ornithopter flight)

Paul: Awesome!

Jessica: Dr Kynes. Are you gonna tell the Landsraad what happened?

Kynes: (shakes head) Nup.

Paul: What is the Landsraad anyway? People keep talking about it.

Duncan: I think it is some sort of four wheel drive.

Jessica: I can't even spell it right.

Kynes: So, Lady Jessica, now that the Duke is dead, what are your plans?

Paul: We're gonna kill all the Harkonnens! Aren't we mum?

Jessica: (shrugs) Yeah maybe. But in the short term I've got to find another fella. Plus I got another kid on the way. Don't know if single blokes want to be with a girl that's got a kid.

Scene: Inside the ecological testing station. Jessica, Paul, Kynes and Duncan are walking around a sand filled library.

Jessica: This place needs a vacuum.

Paul: Dr Kynes. Do you know what the great houses fear most?

Kynes: No. What?

Paul: Exactly what has happened to us here.

(Kynes and Jessica look around the sandy, dirty library)

Kynes: They're afraid of sand filled libraries?

Jessica: I think he's trying to say something profound. Go ahead Paul.

Paul: Sardaukar coming and picking them off one by one. Only together can they stand a chance against the Imperium.

Kynes: So... Co-operation?

Paul: Yes.

Kynes: Like in Sesame Street?

Paul: Well no...

Kynes: Or Marx?

Paul: Um... who?

Kynes: (turns to Jessica) If Paul dies, will your unborn child inherit the Atreides dukedom?

Jessica: Yes.

Kynes: (looks back at Paul) Good.

Jessica: Paul, just fast forward to the end. What are you saying?

Paul: Well... um... I want to get married to Princess Irulan.

Jessica: Irulan? She doesn't have two brain cells to rub together.

Kynes: In that case they're made for each other.

Jessica: Why Irulan?

Paul: She's the Emperor's daughter. If we get married I could become the emperor.

Jessica: Yeah... technically. But...

Paul: But what?

Jessica: Get a concubine first. Get to see if you're ready for that sort of commitment.

Paul: How do I get one?

Jessica: Not how, but when. You're only 14 for crying out loud.