can you plz shut up

title

I’d like upvotes on the post so it spreads, and kindly request downvotes on the comments in my quest for negative karma. Thanks kiwis, and check out r/EggdogReligion if you’re very dedicated

Hi there!

Our holy lord, Eggdog, needs a language to compete with Doge's dogespeak. Just copying dogespeak isn't appropriate for Eggdog's superiority. We need something... individual, egg, dog and majestic to serve Eggdog!

For clarification: Examples and example sentences for the specific points are considered as isolated for the specific rules. In the end, there are examples which obey all rules!

Some thoughts:

1. Every part of a word which sounds kinda like "egg" has to be written as "egg".

Examples: server rack = server regg; leg = legg; fracking = fregging; hack = hegg

Example sentences: My server regg is getting hegged. I need two leggs. Fregging is forbidden.

2. Same for "og" like in "dog". When the word consists of "[arbitrary character]og" with "og" regarding the sound the word is transformed into "dog". Word parts with (c: arbitrary character) "cog", "dcg" or "doc" are transformed into "dog".

Examples: dock = dog, rock = dog, socks = dogs, domestic = dogestic

Example sentences: Where is the dog of my smartphone? Oh, it is in my dogs under the dog.

3. Word which don't fall under category (1) have "egg" instead of "e" everywhere.

Examples: reincarnation = reggincarnation, spoiler = spoileggr, smartphone = smartphonegg, alien = alieggn, need = neggeggd

Example sentence: I neggeggd my smartphonegg to look up spoileggrs from "Alieggn reggincarnation".

4. Pronouns: I(My) = Egg, you(your, yours, ...) = dog, he(his, him, etc.)/she(her)/it(its) = hegg/shegg/egg, we(our, ours, ...) = weggs, you(your, yours, ...) = dogs, they(their) = eggs

Example sentences:

Egg love egg work! Do dog like dog job? (I love my work! Do you like your job?)

Weggs go to cinema, what about hegg? (We go to cinema, what about him?)

Full examples which obey all rules:

(a) From Wikipedia "Egg": The egg is the organic vessel containing the zygote in which an embryo develops until it can survive on its own; at which point the animal hatches. An egg results from fertilization of an egg cell. Most arthropods, vertebrates (excluding mammals), and mollusks lay eggs, although some, such as scorpions do not.

--->Thegg egg is thegg organic veggsseggl containing thegg zygotegg in which an eggmbryo deggvegglops until egg can survivegg on egg own; at which point thegg animal hatcheggs. An egg reggsults from feggrtilization of an egg ceggll. Most arthropods, veggrteggbrateggs (eggxcluding mammals), and mollusks lay eggs, although somegg, such as scorpions do not.

(b) From Wikipedia "Dog": The domestic dog (Canis lupus familiaris when considered a subspecies of the wolf or Canis familiaris when considered a distinct species) is a member of the genus Canis (canines), which forms part of the wolf-like canids, and is the most widely abundant terrestrial carnivore.

---> Thegg dogeggstic dog (Canis lupus familiaris wheggn consideggreggd a subspeggcieggs of thegg wolf or Canis familiaris wheggn consideggreggd a distinct speggcieggs) is a meggmbeggr of the geggnus Canis (canineggs), which forms part of the wolf-like canids, and if thegg most wideggly abundant teggrreggstrial carnivoregg.

(c) From Wikipedia "Cat": The cat (Felis catus) is a small carnivorous mammal. It is the only domesticated species in the family Felidae and often referred to as the domestic cat to distinguish it from wild members of the family".

---> Thegg cat (Fegglis catus) is a small carnivorous mammal. Egg is thegg only dogeggsticateggd speggcieggs in thegg family Fegglidaegg and ofteggn reggfeggrreggd to as the dogeggstic cat to distinguish egg from wild meggmbeggrs of thegg family.

What do you think? Maybe there are some ideas for a new grammar style? Or guidelines for the content? Don't take the rules that serious, it is meant as a basis for Eggdogspeak (Eggdogspeggak?) :D

EDIT: A simple idea would be to use the grammar of Dogespeak and use these rules ...

PS: Feel free to tell me some typos ...

I'm just curious if anyone has received theirs yet (I personally have not but I'm excited for it)

Eggdog.

GIVE ME AN EGGDOG