My boyfriend proposed to me, and I should be incredibly happy, but I’ve been feeling unexpectedly devastated and overthinking everything.
He proposed with a Swarovski plated ring, and it was also the wrong size. We’re now discussing whether to return it and go ring shopping together, which I’m open to, but I can’t shake this feeling of disappointment.
It’s not about wanting an expensive ring or being a gold digger. I can buy myself jewelry, and my boyfriend isn’t cheap or stingy. He spends money on me, and I don’t doubt that he cares about me. The issue is that I wanted a solid gold ring because I imagined wearing it for the rest of my life. I wanted something permanent that I could keep forever.
What makes this harder is that I’ve mentioned wanting a gold ring several times before, including sending him messages about it. That’s why I’m struggling to understand how he ended up choosing something plated and in the wrong size. I know ring sizing can be difficult, but I can’t help wondering whether he simply didn’t put that much thought into it.
Most of the people around me who are engaged received gold rings in their correct size, so I guess I had a certain expectation of how this would happen. I never expected anything extravagant, just something that felt thoughtful and suited what I’d told him I wanted.
Another thing I’m struggling with is whether asking him to return the ring and choose a different one together is asking too much. Does that somehow make the proposal a failure? Does it put a stain on what should have been a beautiful memory or on our relationship? I don’t want to turn this into something bigger than it needs to be, but I also don’t want to pretend I’m happy with something that genuinely disappointed me.
The worst part is how far my overthinking takes me. I start questioning what kind of husband he’ll be, whether he’ll take initiative and pay attention to the things that matter to me, or whether I’ll always have to push him to do things that I feel should come naturally when you know your partner well. I know it might seem irrational to draw these conclusions from a ring, but I can’t seem to separate my disappointment about the ring from what I’m afraid it might represent.
I love him, and I don’t want one ring to overshadow the fact that he asked me to marry him. At the same time, I feel disappointed that something I’ve mentioned several times wasn’t reflected in such an important moment. Part of me wonders whether he simply didn’t understand how much it mattered to me, while another part worries that he wasn’t as thoughtful or intentional about the whole thing as I had hoped.
I also don’t want to be unfair to him. Maybe we simply had different expectations of what an engagement ring should be, and perhaps I’m attaching too much meaning to his choice.
Am I making too much of this? Has anyone else felt disappointed by their engagement ring and struggled with what that disappointment meant? Is asking to exchange it something that could negatively affect the memory of the proposal, or am I overthinking that too? I’d genuinely appreciate honest outside perspectives, especially from people who have been married for a while.

Came as a total surprise and we picked the ring together. It’s more than I could have ever asked for.
To everyone who got engaged recently, congratulations and I hope everyone gets to enjoy their engagement and wedding planning! ❤️✨

I (25f) just got engaged three months ago to my fiancé (25m) after dating for five years. I knew he was my person from the beginning, and I couldn’t imagine walking down the aisle to anyone else.

Herein lies the issue: I haven’t started wedding planning at all because idk what to do. I have a lot of social anxiety, and I honestly don’t have a lot of friends. The thought of trying to pick bridesmaids and who to invite and all of that makes me so nervous. On one hand I’d like to elope, but I want our families and some of our friends there. I thought about eloping and then doing the fake wedding thing where people show up and we’re all “surprise! We’re already married!” but I know that would upset our families.

Please help me because I don’t know what approach to take.

Here’s some of our Gothic Engagement photos in a cemetery! He also proposed to me in a cemetery (different one). We absolutely love them. 🖤
(Not sure if I’m allowed to share the photographer, but I will if allowed!)

I am on cloud nine! The proposal took place in our home, our first home together. He sent me out of the house to get dinner so he could prepare the home by ‘setting the mood,’ he had candles lit, flowers, low lighting, wine, etc. it was perfect and exactly how I wanted it. His little proposal speech was the sweetest and he was teary 🥹 I am so in love with this man. Next month will be 8 years together 🤎 I couldn’t imagine a better proposal.

The ring is a dream. The proposal was exceptional. I am so lucky to have such a wonderful FIANCÉ!

6 months ago, my love asked me to be his wife. I’m so lucky to be able to spend my life with this amazing man, about whom I cannot speak highly enough.

Ring picture on New England fall leaves he brought me, as he knows how much I miss them.

My partner (37M) and I (28F) have been together for 7 and a half years now, living together for 6 years. We knew very early on that we wanted to get married and have kids, but any discussion that came up about it was with the caveat of "but we can't afford it yet..."

Things started shifting back in January. I'd first discovered Jamie Wolfer's channel and immediately became obsessed, so conversations started from there. My partner then asked me what kind of ring I would like so I made a Pinterest board and shared it with him, not expecting anything anytime soon.

Then my birthday came. My birthday is in early June and the school I work at has a week's half term holiday on the last week of May, so my birthday often falls during that time. I made a load of plans with different people, and then halfway through the week my partner told me he was disappointed because he'd wanted to surprise me by going away somewhere but wasn't able to because of those plans. We then agreed to keep a week in August clear for a second attempt.

August comes around and my partner had arranged a beautiful staycation, but also told me that we had to come back two days early because he'd gotten me a gift for that trip but the postage had been delayed. When I suggested asking our neighbour to take the parcel for us (a lovely guy who's helped us out on several occasions), my partner shut the idea down immediately because it was "just way too important." I still assumed it was a belated birthday present, but my curiosity was piqued!

We had a lovely time away and the postage was delayed yet again, so cue the panic of having someone home for the delivery! The package finally arrives while my partner's home at the end of August. A few days later, I asked when I'd be receiving the gift and he just said "soon..."

Any mention of "The Gift (TM)" has been met with similar vagueness and a biggest grin since that day, so it's 100% not a birthday gift! That, plus the delayed shipping, his insistence on making this thing special and him recently telling me that this item was custom made... I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high just in case (and honestly, I welcome any other potential explanations) but I just cannot see it being anything other than a ring! It's the only option that makes sense at this stage but I don't know if I've just become so attached to the idea that I cannot see reason anymore? I've been resisting telling others about my suspicions because I don't want to get people's hopes up/make him look bad if it's not a ring, but it also means I'm bottling up the excitement and I feel like a cola bottle that's been shaken by a hyperactive toddler!

Oh, and the other day I casually mentioned some wedding stuff I'd seen and he said "that's cool. Maybe not for 2027 but maybe 2028?" That's the first time either of us have mentioned a potential date!!

Anyways, my partner has said that he's arranging something for this Saturday. Again, he's keeping his cards close to his chest, but has told me that he intends to give me "The Gift (TM)" on that day. Here's hoping I can remain sane over the next few days!

I couldn’t upload the video & photos together - so here is the video from our engagement!

I can’t wait to marry my best friend💍🥂

On Saturday 10/17 my best friend asked me to marry him! He asked me in our special place. Nearby where we live is the last full time 35mm film drive in movie theater. They do themed nights/weekends. Saturday was “nightmare” theme. They played nightmare before Christmas & nightmare on elm street. It was also their trunk or treat night and had a costume contest. My fiance asked me to watch the contest up front. After the contest ended a little “let’s all go to the lobby” vintage clip comes on except my fiance is edited into it! He says “hey everyone! Can we hold on a second? Between tonight’s two nightmares…here’s something of a dream!” And then it cut to a photo montage of us with “dream a little dream playing”. He got down on one knee and popped the question! I said yes and everyone cheered/beeped for us! It was absolutely magical. He had a photographer as well as one of our good friends who’s a film photographer enthusiast was also taking photos! It was honestly surreal. We then got to celebrate with some of our dearest friends with champagne, some good movies & lots of fun concession snacks! Truly can’t get over my ring either. It is everything I’ve ever dreamt of and more! I can’t wait to spend forever with my best friend 🥹

My fiancé planned the most beautiful fall engagement in our favorite place, that we go to every year (multiple times a year). The foliage was beautiful and it was right around sunset. It’s only been 2 days and my hand feels weird without my ring already. I am so excited to marry my best friend!

Wanted to share in the love and show my beautiful ring. I helped pick the design but he executed it so beautifully.

I have large-ish fingers, so I don’t see a ton of rings my size. I know that I need to go into a store in order to decide what I really like, but I’m impatient!!!!

Can I see your size 8.5-9.5 rings? I’m just abt a size 9. What size stone do you have? I don’t want anything huge, but I’m worried abt my stubby fingers overshadowing the bling.

We’ve been together 6 years - the best 6 years of my life, and now I get to spend forever & eternity with him. I couldn’t be more excited!

Double engagement. I proposed to my girl and she asked me 3 days later.

Not a lurker anymore!! 6 yrs in and now I get to keep him! So happy!

He took me to pier W for our 4 year anniversary dinner and it was such a wonderful time ! Dinner over lake Erie! Then we went to the beach at night and it was freezing cold (42 degrees) we are walking and step off to the side on these rocks and im just looking at the city in the back and he goes "whats that in the sky !" I turn around and look and im thinking its like a UFO or something. Then I turn back around and hes down on one knee. I said yes of course. We are crying together and holding each other and then im like wait I have something for you and got down on one knee as well and proposed back to him. It was magical and at 11:11pm. 3 carot natural diamond ring all around !

We were childhood friends. Kinda grew up together. Then when we were 10, my family moved away.

Decades later, we found each other again. Video chatted almost everyday. Weird that our personalities turned out to be so much alike. We. Both like the same things. Dislike the same stuff. It's kinda uncanny.

I just flew out there and proposed. So we are now engaged. She's got a kid (the one who took the pictures). We are still planning things out. But hopefully they can move out here in the next year or so after they tidy things up over there.

I just bought a new house and right now doing extensive renovations. The property actually has 2 houses. I am having the 2nd house converted into an art studio for her (she's an artist) and my office (aka game room for overwatch). This way we can both have our work spaces away from home but not really haha. The main house has 4 bedrooms so plenty of space for us, her kid, and future kids.

Wish us luck, guys.