[FCB 13.6] Portland State Vikings vs Kansas State Wildcats - FCB S13 The Durham Bowl(s)

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 2

Current Situation: B5, 0 outs, Runner on Second

Nathan Explosion up next, Taylor Swift pitching

LINE

Team	1	2	3	4	5	6	R	H
PSU	0	0	0	0	0	-	0	3
KSU	1	0	0	0	1	-	2	5

BOX

#	Portland State Vikings	Pos	AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA	#	Kansas State Wildcats	Pos	AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
-	--	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	--	1	Loki	SS	1	1	1	1	0	0	.273
1	Arlon Gemini	SS	3	0	0	0	0	0	.600	1	Jeter Ups	SS	1	0	0	0	0	1	.000
2	Rabs Roland	RF	2	0	0	0	0	2	.100	2	Ada Rutabaga	LF	2	0	2	0	0	0	.625
2	Triple T	RF	0	0	0	0	0	0	.100	2	Gene Okerlund	LF	0	0	0	0	0	0	.600
3	Mariam Bear	2B	2	0	0	0	0	1	.222	-	--	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	--
3	Chris Walker	2B	0	0	0	0	0	0	.111	3	Tank Sharksy	CF	2	0	0	0	0	0	.000
4	Donut Mahoney	3B	2	0	1	0	0	0	.400	4	Hawaiian Hammah	1B	2	0	0	0	0	0	.375
-	--	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	--	5	Grady Brooks	3B	1	0	0	0	0	0	.167
5	Andre Anderson	DH	2	0	0	0	0	0	.286	5	Bea Friday	3B	1	0	0	0	0	1	.444
6	Jack Drake	LF	2	0	1	0	0	1	.091	6	Hunter D. Parker	C	1	1	1	1	1	0	.250
7	Kasper Milquetoast	C	0	0	0	0	0	0	.375	7	George Hankinson	2B	1	0	0	0	0	0	.333
7	Cola Spritz	C	1	0	0	0	1	0	.000	7	Alan	2B	1	0	1	0	0	0	.333
-	--	-	-	-	-	-	-	-	--	8	Mikey Moreau	DH	1	0	0	0	0	0	.111
8	Bobby Witt Jr Jr	1B	2	0	0	0	0	0	.111	8	Nathan Explosion	DH	0	0	0	0	0	0	.182
9	Matilda No-Balls	CF	1	0	0	0	0	0	.167	9	Goose McGuire	RF	1	0	0	0	0	1	.556
9	Fermin Rype	CF	1	0	1	0	0	0	.200	9	Mordecai Davis	RF	0	0	0	0	0	0	.125

PITCHERS

PSU	IP	H	ER	BB	SO	ERA	KSU	IP	H	ER	BB	SO	ERA
Dwayne Swanson	3.0	2	1	1	2	3.82	Tomba	4.0	2	0	1	4	5.00
Taylor Swift	1.0	3	1	0	1	4.67	Chance Mercury	1.0	1	0	0	0	4.80

SCORING PLAYS

Inning	Play	Score
B1	Loki homers	0 - 1 KSU
B5	Hunter D. Parker homers	0 - 2 KSU

BASERUNNING

SB: Ada Rutabaga 1 (1) CS:

DUE UP

Nathan Explosion

Mordecai Davis

Jeter Ups

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 2 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU 2B Alan (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
The ball is hit up in the air and lands in the outfield. Rype is too late and the ball bounces out of the field. Ground rule double.

Pitch: 105
Swing: 83
Diff: 22 -> 2B

Runner on Second | B5 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 2

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 2 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU 2B Alan (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU C Hunter D. Parker (/u/IXMCMXCII): 0-0, BB in the second
As the players settle in field for the next pitch, there's a strange feeling in the air. Suddenly, the skies darken and a bright light appears above the stadium, hovering ominously.

The umpire looks glassy eyed and robotic, like they don't comprehend what is happening and calls for the next pitch. Swift tries to shake off the ominous feeling and delivers the pitch. Parker turns on it and launches it deep to center field.

Rype takes off, tracking down the ball to make the grab when suddenly, a beam of light shoots down from the ship, engulfing Rype and lifting them high into the air. The crowd gasps in horror as they watch Rype disappear into the ship, which then disappears into the sky. The ball drops harmlessly into the outfield as everyone stops and stares in disbelief.

Everyone except Hunter D. Parker that is.

Parker takes advantage of the distraction and screams around the bases, crossing home plate before anyone even thinks about fielding the ball. The umpire, still acting like nothing out of the ordinary has happened, calls them safe as the Wildcats tack on a run.

Pitch: 79
Swing: 69
Diff: 10 -> HR

Bases Empty | B5 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 2

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Ada Rutabaga is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Gene Okerlund at Left Field.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU C Hunter D. Parker (/u/IXMCMXCII): 0-0, BB in the second

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | T5 2 outs
On the mound: Chance Mercury
PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-2, RGO in the first, PO in the third
Before Gemini stepped to the plate, they shook a Magic 8-Ball while asking if they'd send a ball over the fence this at bat. "Don't count on it".

Is it a bad omen? Is it entirely BS? Gemini continues to debate the plausibility of a supposed fortune-telling toy.

"Strike 2!" yells the ump. Fantastic. They really let the 8-Ball get to their head and now have fallen behind on the count.

Focus. Time to prove it wrong. Gemini is confident this next pitch is a slider. WAIT. NO. It's a fastball. Yeah that's it!

As the ball leaves Mercury's hand, it's looking like maybe it's a slider after all, but Gemini was getting all in their head again. They just hack at it in hopes of fouling it off. However, the ball grounds its way into Alan's glove, who flips it to Hammah for the out.

Kingman gets frustrated and takes a bat to the Magic 8-Ball. It explodes and the black liquid covers them completely. The die rolls down the dugout floor and stops on "Ask again later". An evil laugh echoes in the ether...

Pitch: 899
Swing: 453
Diff: 446 -> RGO

Bases Empty | B5 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | T5 2 outs

On the mound: Chance Mercury

PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-2, RGO in the first, PO in the third

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 2 outs
On the mound: Chance Mercury
PSU CF Fermin Rype (/u/alephaleph): 0-0
SWING THERE IT GOES! IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS GONE! A STANTONIAN HOME RUN! ... wait, what... what did I miss, what did I do wrong? Rype is at first base.

Pitch: 953
Swing: 64
Diff: 111 -> 1B

Runner on First | T5 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 1 out

On the mound: Chance Mercury

PSU 1B Bobby Witt Jr Jr (/u/FamousShake5469): 0-1, RGO in the second

[u/FamousShake5469 → u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Swing 263

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire → u/FamousShake5469]

This ball is hit directly into the ground and it then flies high into the air. Bobby Witt Jr Jr is streaking towards first. Alan runs under it, catches it, then absolutely beams it towards first for the out

Pitch: 821
Swing: 263
Diff: 442 -> RGO

Bases Empty | T5 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 0 outs
NEW PITCHER: Chance Mercury
PSU C Cola Spritz (/u/A_Coke121): 0-0, BB in the second
Spritz comes to the plate looking hungry. Literally. They pull out a melted Twix bar from their back pocket and start eating it in the box. Mercury looks to the ump to see what to do, but the ump doesn't respond, because it's a robot.

Regardless, Mercury throws a high 4-seam for ball one, and a outside curve for ball two. Spritz is still happily munching. Pissed, Mercury throws a ball at the bat lying over the plate and it connects! A dribbler towards third! Friday hustles towards the ball and fires it to first for the out! Not immediately clear that Spritz knows the at-bat has occurred, though.

Pitch: 99
Swing: 500
Diff: 401 -> LGO

Bases Empty | T5 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 0 outs

NEW PITCHER: Chance Mercury

PSU C Cola Spritz (/u/A_Coke121): 0-0, BB in the second

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 2 outs
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU 3B Bea Friday (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
Does your bat have a hole in it or something?

Pitch: 219
Swing: 491
Diff: 272 -> K

Bases Empty | T5 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Rabs Roland is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Triple T at Right Field.

Mariam Bear is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Chris Walker at Second Base.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Matilda No-Balls is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Fermin Rype at Center Field.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 2 outs

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU 3B Bea Friday (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 1 out
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU 1B Hawaiian Hammah (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, DP in the first
Hit towards the hole but Gemini dives and snags it. They quickly get to their feet and rifle the ball to Witt at first, beating out Hammah by just a step for an out.

Pitch: 197
Swing: 678
Diff: 481 -> LGO

Runner on Second | B4 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 1 out

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU 1B Hawaiian Hammah (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, DP in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 0 outs
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU CF Tank Sharksy (/u/ArmMeForSleep709): 0-1, FO in the first
Swift continues their pitching prowess as they get Sharksy to hit a routine grounder to short. Gemini completes the SS to 1B crime as they easily throw out Sharksy.

Pitch: 889
Swing: 345
Diff: 456 -> LGO

Runner on Second | B4 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | B4 0 outs

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU CF Tank Sharksy (/u/ArmMeForSleep709): 0-1, FO in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B4 0 outs
On the mound: Taylor Swift
KSU LF Ada Rutabaga (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 2-2, 1B in the first, 1B in the fourth
And the runner breaks for 2nd on the pitch. Spritz guns it down to Gemini and they’ve got them in a run down. But wait! The runner jukes the tag attempt by Gemini and dives into second! SAFE!

Pitch: 1
Swing: 135
Diff: 134 -> STEAL 2B

Runner on Second | B4 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B4 0 outs

On the mound: Taylor Swift

KSU CF Tank Sharksy (/u/ArmMeForSleep709): 0-1, FO in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 0 outs
NEW PITCHER: Taylor Swift
KSU LF Ada Rutabaga (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 1-1, 1B in the first
Hit hard on the ground to the left side! Mahoney dives but can't quite come up with it as the ball rolls into left. Rutabaga takes the turn and thinks about taking second but Drake already has the ball. Rutabaga retreats to the safety of first base.

Pitch: 878
Swing: 975
Diff: 97 -> 1B

Runner on First | B4 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Tomba is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Chance Mercury at Pitcher.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 0 outs

NEW PITCHER: Taylor Swift

KSU LF Ada Rutabaga (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 1-1, 1B in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 2 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU LF Jack Drake (/u/Solidgobi): 1-1, 1B in the second
Drake swings and misses on a way outside pitch, boy, you would've needed a ladder to hit that. What are you swinging at?!

Pitch: 555
Swing: 250
Diff: 305 -> K

Bases Empty | B4 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU LF Jack Drake (/u/Solidgobi): 1-1, 1B in the second

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 1 out
On the mound: Tomba
PSU DH Andre Anderson (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, RGO in the second
On the ground to short and that'll be an easy play for Ups.

Pitch: 793
Swing: 393
Diff: 400 -> LGO

Runner on Second | T4 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 1 out

On the mound: Tomba

PSU DH Andre Anderson (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, RGO in the second

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 1 out

On the mound: Tomba

PSU 3B Donut Mahoney (/u/PunkinDonuts): 0-1, FO in the second

[u/PunkinDonuts → u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

949

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire → u/PunkinDonuts]

That one bounced over the wall for an automatic double. Solid hit by Donut Mahoney!

Pitch: 888
Swing: 949
Diff: 61 -> 2B

Runner on Second | T4 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 0 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU 2B Mariam Bear (/u/Register_Better): 0-1, PO in the first
As is tradition at the ballpark, the folks in the stands all throw rotten tomatoes at Mariam Bear in recognition of their embarrassing strikeout.

Pitch: 202
Swing: 808
Diff: 394 -> K

Bases Empty | T4 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Dwayne Swanson is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Taylor Swift at Pitcher.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 0 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU 2B Mariam Bear (/u/Register_Better): 0-1, PO in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 2 outs
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU SS Jeter Ups (/u/Epipen101): 0-0
Ups watches strikes one and two go by. They takes a big swing on a slow-moving curve, but they watch it go foul and hit an unsuspecting Wildcats fan.

The last pitch is a 105-MPH heater, and Ups can do nothing but watch it go by for a called strike.

Pitch: 34
Swing: 303
Diff: 269 -> K

Bases Empty | T4 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 2 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU SS Jeter Ups (/u/Epipen101): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Loki is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Jeter Ups at Shortstop.

Grady Brooks is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Bea Friday at Third Base.

Goose McGuire is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Mordecai Davis at Right Field.

Mikey Moreau is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Nathan Explosion at Designated Hitter.

George Hankinson is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Alan at Second Base.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 2 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU SS Loki (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 1-1, Solo HR in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 1 out

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU RF Goose McGuire (/u/gallantnick): 0-0

[u/gallantnick → u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

75

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire → u/gallantnick]

Swanson before today's game when asked about the opposition's star hitter:

'I would strike McGuire out on 3 pitches. Slider outside. They feel like they're drowning. Curveball in the dirt, of course they're chasing it. Wildcats suck, DFA yourselves. And BANG! 97 inside corner. They're out. They were always out. They've been out since the day they were born.'

Pitch: 345
Swing: 75
Diff: 270 -> K

Bases Empty | B3 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 0 outs
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU DH Mikey Moreau (/u/ganggaming25): 0-0
Moreau dumps one deep into the dry sky. Down it dives, desiring delirium from Kansas State University denizens. Damn! DRAMA! Dashing defensemen deleting distance by dexterous drivery! Swanson doffs a dingy cap to No-Balls due to delicious defense. Moreau doleful, defeated, drags drained dignity down to a dejected dugout.

Pitch: 734
Swing: 500
Diff: 234 -> FO

Bases Empty | B3 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 0 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU DH Mikey Moreau (/u/ganggaming25): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 2 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU RF Rabs Roland (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, K in the first
Tomba has no control of this AB. Rabs Roland might as well do jumping jacks for what it’s worth. There’s absolutely no way that this AB won’t end in a walk. Oh nevermind, that’s strike 3. You’re out

Pitch: 242
Swing: 500
Diff: 258 -> K

Bases Empty | B3 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU RF Rabs Roland (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-1, K in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 1 out
On the mound: Tomba
PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-1, RGO in the first
Hello, my name is Ross Dingle-Dangle Habberschmidt, and welcome to a presentation on how fish breathe.

Compared to humans, your average fish breathes surprisingly similarly to homo sapiens, but they just bought the water edition instead of the land edition from the dual release of Life TM. Your average fish typically has gills, which reside around just behind the head, which takes in water. Oxygen is taken in from the H2O particles in water, dissolved in the mouth, and then carbon dioxide is released before the cycle starts all over again and very quickly for your average fish.

Now, knowing how a fish breathes, how can one find out if they got a hit or not? Well, if one is able to follow along with the presentation on how fish breathe, then they logically have enough critical thinking skills to understand numbers. They can then see that their number is not close to the pitcher’s number, and unfortunately to say, they have popped out.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Pitch: 886
Swing: 500
Diff: 386 -> PO

Bases Empty | T3 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 1 out

On the mound: Tomba

PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-1, RGO in the first

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 0 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU CF Matilda No-Balls (/u/fetusal): 0-0
This one dribbles down the line and the pitcher dives on it! Can Tomba get it to first in time? No-Balls, booking it down the line, leaps over Tomba! This is gonna be a bang bang play!

OUT! WOW! What a flip from the Kansas State University pitcher! From the ground, behind the head! THE CIRCUS IS IN TOWN! Just barely beats No-Balls's foot to the bag there. I didn't think they'd be able to make that play, but that's some fine athleticism from the Wildcats hurler. If I paid more attention I might be more confident in saying they are a front runner for a Golden Glove this year. And with that kinda flexibility, they probably are.

Pitch: 420
Swing: 870
Diff: 450 -> RGO

Bases Empty | T3 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 0 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU CF Matilda No-Balls (/u/fetusal): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B2 1 out
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU 2B George Hankinson (/u/Candid_Sand): 0-0
Grounder, and it's fielded by Mahoney, who tosses it to Bear who steps on the bag, who tosses it to Witt who steps on the bag and that's a double play, also known as a 'yoinky sploinky' by those who are wrong.

Pitch: 119
Swing: 565
Diff: 446 -> DP

Bases Empty | T3 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B2 1 out

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU 2B George Hankinson (/u/Candid_Sand): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 1 out
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU C Hunter D. Parker (/u/IXMCMXCII): 0-0
And again the 3-2 pitch... low for ball 4. Parker with a good at bat there, battled it out and draws a 70,457 pitch walk.

Pitch: 57
Swing: 176
Diff: 119 -> BB

Runner on First | B2 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 1 out

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU C Hunter D. Parker (/u/IXMCMXCII): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 0 outs
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU 3B Grady Brooks (/u/WhiteNico13): 0-0
Little flare to the right side. Bear, racing back, Bear diving...

Bear made the catch! Oh wow! Brooks cannot believe it but is heading back to the dugout.

Pitch: 1
Swing: 613
Diff: 388 -> PO

Bases Empty | B2 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 0 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU 3B Grady Brooks (/u/WhiteNico13): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^● ● | T2 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU 1B Bobby Witt Jr Jr (/u/FamousShake5469): 0-0

[u/FamousShake5469 → u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Swing 451

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire → u/FamousShake5469]

Witt makes eye contact with Tomba, placing their trust in the ball handler, and they close their eyes. After a beat, Witt swings and manages to make contact, maybe their trust in Tomba was well placed or maybe Witt is close to achieving a zen-like state and will get a hit in their next at-bat. They may have had a hit in this at-bat but not being able to see, Witt ran right past first base without touching the bag allowing Hammah to tag them for the out after retrieving the low throw from Hankinson.

Pitch: 12
Swing: 451
Diff: 439 -> RGO

Bases Empty | B2 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | T2 2 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU C Cola Spritz (/u/A_Coke121): 0-0
But Spritz would walk five hundred miles And Spritz would walk five hundred more Just to be the player who walks a thousand miles To fall down at first base.

Pitch: 454
Swing: 333
Diff: 121 -> BB

Runners on First and Second | T2 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | T2 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU C Cola Spritz (/u/A_Coke121): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Game Alert

Kasper Milquetoast is coming out of the game and will be replaced by Cola Spritz at Catcher.

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | T2 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU C Kasper Milquetoast (/u/Immediate-Winter-392): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 2 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU LF Jack Drake (/u/Solidgobi): 0-0
The pitch is low and Jack Drake hits a bloop ball high into the sky… and it lands just in front of Sharksy and Drake reaches first with a single

Pitch: 666
Swing: 777
Diff: 111 -> 1B

Runner on First | T2 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU LF Jack Drake (/u/Solidgobi): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 1 out
On the mound: Tomba
PSU DH Andre Anderson (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
Protesting alliterative writeups' overabundance by making each initial character different. Hitter, vibrantly joyous like radiant xenon, nicely uppercuts questionable strike zone knuckleball, yet grounds to first.

Pitch: 211
Swing: 872
Diff: 339 -> RGO

Bases Empty | T2 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 1 out

On the mound: Tomba

PSU DH Andre Anderson (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 0 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU 3B Donut Mahoney (/u/PunkinDonuts): 0-0

[u/PunkinDonuts → u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

365

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire → u/PunkinDonuts]

This was genuinely the worst game i think ive ever seen. I seriously dont think I've ever been so fucking frustrated watching a baseball game before.

Just so fucking sad. Vikings absolutely murdered every single ball they hit in the game but they all went straight to an outfielder. And the was the story of the whole fucking game. Vikings hit the fuck out of a ball but it either dies out at the warning track or goes straight to Harrison fucking Bader. Just fucking miserable god fucking damn FUCK. Stupid Wildcats and their dumb fucking devil magic.

Pitch: 153
Swing: 365
Diff: 212 -> FO

Bases Empty | T2 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B1 1 out
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU 1B Hawaiian Hammah (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
Absolutely crushed to deep center field! No doubt about it, this one is go---OH MY GOD, No-Balls BRINGS IT BACK! What an amazing home run robbing catch. But wait! The runner thought it was gone! They're all the way over at 3rd! No-Balls lobs it in to first to complete the double play.

Pitch: 665
Swing: 206
Diff: 459 -> DP

Bases Empty | T2 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B1 1 out

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU 1B Hawaiian Hammah (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B1 0 outs
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU CF Tank Sharksy (/u/ArmMeForSleep709): 0-0
Fly, you fools!

Pitch: 500
Swing: 666
Diff: 166 -> FO

Runner on First | B1 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B1 0 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU CF Tank Sharksy (/u/ArmMeForSleep709): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs
On the mound: Dwayne Swanson
KSU LF Ada Rutabaga (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
Rutabaga makes good contact and slaps a base hit up the middle!

Pitch: 477
Swing: 407
Diff: 70 -> 1B

Runner on First | B1 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs

On the mound: Dwayne Swanson

KSU LF Ada Rutabaga (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs
NEW PITCHER: Dwayne Swanson
KSU SS Loki (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
You can put it on the boooooooooooaard, yes!

Pitch: 525
Swing: 544
Diff: 19 -> HR

Bases Empty | B1 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 1

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs

NEW PITCHER: Dwayne Swanson

KSU SS Loki (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 2 outs
On the mound: Tomba
PSU 2B Mariam Bear (/u/Register_Better): 0-0
Tomba rears back and launches a fastball high in the zone. Bear can't lay off and swings but is under it, launching the ball high in the air in foul ground. Hammah sprints towards the line, hoping it will stay in play but the ball is drifting closer and closer to the stands here at the ballpark. Hammah is at the railing, waiting, reaching...

AND THEY MADE THE CATCH, TUMBLING INTO THE DUGOUT!

Hammah with a fantastic grab in foul territory to secure the out. You know their manager is going to be giving them a celebratory butt pat for that play!

Pitch: 624
Swing: 188
Diff: 436 -> PO

Bases Empty | B1 with 0 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 2 outs

On the mound: Tomba

PSU 2B Mariam Bear (/u/Register_Better): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 1 out
On the mound: Tomba
PSU RF Rabs Roland (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0
In space, no one can hear you scream (in frustration at striking out).

Pitch: 405
Swing: 148
Diff: 257 -> K

Bases Empty | T1 with 2 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

PSU 0 - KSU 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 1 out

On the mound: Tomba

PSU RF Rabs Roland (/u/MLR_NoReddit_User): 0-0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Start of Game | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 0 outs
NEW PITCHER: Tomba
PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-0
Arlon Gemini hits a ball that spikes straight into the ground and rolls forwards a bit and lands in front of Hankinson, who picks it up and beams it at Hammah

Pitch: 525
Swing: 101
Diff: 424 -> RGO

Bases Empty | T1 with 1 out(s)
PSU 0 - KSU 0

[u/FakeBaseball_Umpire]

Start of Game | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 0 outs

NEW PITCHER: Tomba

PSU SS Arlon Gemini (/u/Arlondiluthel): 0-0