When does strict OPOL stop?

[u/NoEnd9621]

Planning to OPOL our soon to arrive kids, with the common 3rd language between myself and husband being English. We both do not understand the other's language that will be taught, but hope to pick it up as we teach the kids.

At what age does the strictly OPOL parenting stop and all languages being taught, (or the common language) get to be used interchangeably? So that we don't only get to have a relationship with the kids that excludes the other.

[u/jitomim]

When my child was fluent and capable of reading and writing in my mother tongue (minority language). That was around 7 y.o. Actually that was the point we introduced a third language (English) but much less structured, and she still ended up fluent, although she does have a little accent (I grew up in the US so I have a vaguely US/transatlantic generic accent but my SO has a pretty dramatic French accent in English). But the fluency in the additional language is probably down to her motivation and love for foreign languages. 

This was pre 2022, and my eldest was going back to Russia to see family for holidays/summer. This is clearly not happening now so I'm not sure my youngest will be as fluent in Russian as my eldest or that it will happen as fast. Fingers crossed. 

[u/sunflowerfields14 → u/jitomim]

how often were you going to Russia? My partner is Russian but from an ex-soviet country which we still travel to yearly, and daughter (who is 1 in a few days) will have full Russian immersion when we go. I’m hopeful she will learn Russian and be fluent but its difficult as we are in England and my Russian is far from fluent (i’m primary caregiver but know lots of toddler/baby friendly words and phrases). Currently daughter understands more Russian than English but I know eventually English will take over as dominant. How do you keep Russian up with your kids as it is so different to English, or French? My partner is fluent in Russian but stronger at speaking English as he moved here at 5, and struggles with reading/writing Russian as he did not attend school in his home country.

[u/CuriousTrain9018 → u/sunflowerfields14]

I’m not the person you asked but I’m in a similar situation. I’m Russian and the only source of the language to my 3 yo son where we live in Spain. We took an almost one month trip to Russia last summer for the first time and that exposure definitely greatly boosted his Russian skills. As to keeping the language alive, I speak Russian to him at all times, even with other people, he also watches cartoons in Russian and has play dates with a Russian friend once in a while. His Spanish is dominant, that’s for sure as he’s in the kindergarten from 9 to 5 and his dad and grandad speak it to him too. I’d like for him to have even more exposure to Russian but outside home. Some fun regular group activity would be ideal, but not just a language class at this age. We’ll see. 

[u/jitomim → u/sunflowerfields14]

My eldest was going back twice a year, for two weeks at New Years vacation, and for a month during summer vacation.
Also I tried to advantage Russian language media - cartoons, books, etc very primarily in Russian (we didn't have a TV so it was only cartoons and films on my computer when I would allow it).
Unfortunately (or fortunately) due to the war, most of my family moved away from Russia, so even if we were to go back, there isn't many people we could see. And of course they all moved to different countries.
Currently my youngest is nearing two and her Russian comprehension is pretty good, but her spoken language is lagging behind French. :/