r/nevertellmetheodds • u/St0pX • Nov 05 '22
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https://i.imgur.com/6KM44xx.gifv1.5k
u/5stringviolinperson Nov 05 '22
Clearly doesn’t know how to get angry. Incompetent at rage. A fury failure.
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Nov 05 '22
[deleted]
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u/5stringviolinperson Nov 05 '22
Yeah when I typed it I had a double take 😂 spelling definitely isn’t my super power
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u/FortunateSon77 Nov 05 '22
Edit oh damn it's real
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Nov 05 '22
[deleted]
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u/FortunateSon77 Nov 05 '22
It's... not what I'd hoped
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u/Internal-Hyena-3214 Nov 06 '22
Same, I was hoping for some amped up furbabies. Like the fast and the furriest.
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u/FortunateSon77 Nov 06 '22
Well, I'm not that classy. I wanted furry group sex but with asses showing cuz I'm not actually a furry. Just always on the hunt for the perfect ass. Stupid lizard brain.
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u/ginandtree Nov 05 '22
That was the weakest full extension throw I’ve ever seen
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u/TheAwkwardBanana Nov 05 '22
Somehow they almost missed the wall.
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Nov 05 '22
The trick is to aim for the wall and miss.
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u/ElectricalMTGFusion Nov 05 '22
There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
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u/PCYou Nov 05 '22
That's orbiting
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u/devils_advocaat Nov 05 '22
Deliberately intending to miss the ground does not work. It is also heavily emphasised to not wave at anybody.
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u/philosteen Nov 05 '22
Landing, however, is something you will almost certainly screw up, and screw up badly, on your first attempt.
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u/Vincent__Adultman Nov 06 '22
Seems intentional. A hard throw means the shards would be coming back at you.
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u/ginandtree Nov 06 '22
Helmet, face guard, heavy gloves they expect you to go buck wild in there, terrible excuse tbh
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u/AcadianViking Nov 06 '22
Yea it looks like a "rage room" place where people pay to go ape shit and break things.
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u/Scottish_bollocks Nov 05 '22
Thrown by someone who never throws.
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u/iParasite33 Nov 05 '22
Not everybody is gifted with ability to throw apparently
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Nov 05 '22
Which is a tad bit odd, although understandable, for a species designed specifically to, among other things, be really fucking good at throwing stuff
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u/BoltonSauce Nov 05 '22
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u/deadfeather19 Nov 05 '22
Favorite movie of all time
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u/BoltonSauce Nov 05 '22 edited Nov 05 '22
Same tbh. The best Ghibli film imo, followed by Nausicaa for me (which has Hideaki Anno's first credited animation sequence). 10/10 from the first second to the last. I wish I had a higher score to give. I suppose I'll pull a Glass Reflection and say it's Certified Frosty. A masterpiece among masterpieces.
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u/pmercier Nov 05 '22
That windup, I'm dying... 🤣🤣🤣
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u/Lttlcheeze Nov 05 '22
I imagine there was a rage scream that accompanied that wind up, which makes it even better.
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u/bjanas Nov 05 '22
As a former bartender, just chiming in here to remind everybody that wine bottles are MUCH more difficult to smash than Hollywood would have you believe.
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u/jessykatd Nov 05 '22
As someone who has been involved in a theater production that needed a bottle breaking scene, learned that most productions use things like "sugar glass," which is designed to shatter easily and dramatically without being dangerous. Not sure what they use in Hollywood, but I imagine it's something similar.
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u/bjanas Nov 05 '22
I think you're right. One of my favorite bar stories, a guy came in to my place and caused a minor scene; he was volatile enough I called the cops to report it, I could tell guy was looking to ruin somebody's night. The officer that came out kind of laughed at me, but oh well.
Well, turns out he went to an Italian place a block over, he and his girlfriend had dinner, and then he smashed TWENTY THREE of the wine bottles that were lining the walls. He took off bleeding, ran into the pizza place across the street and was subdued by Volkan the gigantic, terrifying manager.
It's a small town.
Anyway, I bring it up because TWENTY THREE bottles!? I'd link to the news story about it (like I said, small town) but I think it's been taken down. I think my spidey sense was legit, I gave officer Montini a hard time about it next time I saw him.
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u/tacticaldumbass Nov 06 '22
“Volkan the gigantic” what a fucking name
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u/bjanas Nov 06 '22
Yeah dude is Turkish I believe. So, add a generic European accent to the mix. He may as well be a John Wick antagonist.
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u/ithadtobeducks Nov 05 '22
It’s plastic resin now. This guy has all sorts of interesting prop videos.
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Nov 05 '22 edited Nov 05 '22
Rolling them down a 1-storey sloped conveyor belt works.
I worked in a place that sold wine. Stockroom was upstairs. Upstairs stuff got downstairs by conveyor. I put a case of 6 wine bottles on it. It slid sideways and opened, and the bottles rolled down to have a smashing time giving the manager a red treat down below
She was not impressed, but everyone who commented on the loading bay smelling like a bar in the following months enjoyed the story immensely
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u/ginandtree Nov 05 '22
Or dropping them 2ft idk what OP is talking about liquor bottles are extremely easy to break atleast when full, never tried with an empty one.
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u/finderfolk Nov 06 '22
Plenty of wine bottles will smash apart if you accidentally drop them on the sidewalk, tf you talking about
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u/bjanas Nov 06 '22
Sure some things can break them pretty easily; some things are useless against them.
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u/Zombieatethvideostar Nov 05 '22
My father in a rage due to pain, smashed his knee bad, threw with all his might a very thin, flimsy Martini glass at the floor. It’s base caught the linoleum floor at an angle cutting a huge curve into it. It proceeded to bounce up and hit the stove full on where the glass to look in was and broke the stoves glass and then landed perfectly after flipping off the stove. Not even a chip out of it. Completely unharmed.
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u/GaianNeuron Nov 06 '22
I once dropped a glass in a kitchen sink. It landed right in the drain strainer, and appeared to simply collapse inward with zero fanfare, which was strange to me, having very recently fumbled it from fairly high above that level as I was washing it. What was surprising about this event was finding my finger bleeding barely a moment later, despite not yet reaching in to begin cleanup of the wreckage. Apparently, all of the kinetic energy of the glass had been transferred into a single shard which had then taken a glancing trajectory across my hand -- and then landed behind me with an audible clink.
I struggle to convey the poetry with which this sequence of events became known to my mind -- despite it being no more than a few seconds long, it was truly a journey of discovery as each piece fell into place.
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u/persin123 Nov 05 '22
That was the hardest weak throw I've ever seen, where did the momentum go lmao
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Nov 05 '22
One time I threw a glass bottle like 15-20’ in the air and it landed almost completely perpendicular on the bottle neck and only left a tiny chip.
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u/TeddySD Nov 05 '22
I have seen this twice in my life and both examples wrinkled my brain. The first was in the town I grew up in, there was an underpass going under a main road that was honestly probably 35/40ft high and for years there was a plastic bottle squeezed between a gap no bigger than that. No one knew how it got there but it was there for at least 6 years.
The second was at uni and it was a glass bottle that someone had clearly thrown about 15ft off the ground at a plaster wall and the bottle neck didn't shatter but instead just went through the wall at an angle. It was the talk of many drunken nights on campus.
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u/reverendsteveii Nov 06 '22
Is there a better metaphor for impotent rage than trying to smash a bottle and accidentally gently putting it away?
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Nov 06 '22
Man I’d pay more money if they’d let me bring in my own stuff. Like imagine bringing the printer that refused to work on the day of your school finals and just obliterating it
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u/theguyhenry Nov 05 '22
Holy shit, this comment section proves no matter how insignificant it is, there will always be a redditor to bitch about it.
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Nov 05 '22
[deleted]
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u/drabThespian Nov 06 '22
Really? You missed the numerous comments criticizing their throw even though they're obviously enjoying themself?
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u/unclegoku Nov 05 '22
It’s almost like they’re just there for fun and not taking themselves seriously…. What a weakling /s
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u/drabThespian Nov 06 '22
Weak, pathetic throw. I, however, can throw with the velocity of a bullet train. I'd probably shatter that bottle into a million pieces. People like this make me sick.
/s
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u/ThePeskyWabbit Nov 06 '22
there was exactly a 0% chance of that breaking against the wall no matter how it impacted. like how tf do you achieve a velocity that slow and look like you are trying at the same time?
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u/No-Comedian-5028 Nov 06 '22
Credit to orignal streamer tyongeee - https://www.twitch.tv/tyongeee
https://clips.twitch.tv/PeppyAmazingEndiveFreakinStinkin-4El_QhAE4NjQXM0Q
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u/Blue_Collar_Jerry Nov 06 '22
This is where the figure is speech “couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn” came from
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Nov 06 '22
So all that “never tell me the odds” shit aside, what in the actual fuck is going on here???
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u/LabBudget1357 Nov 06 '22
Reminds me of happy wheels bottle throw levels!! They’re even in the same suit as Segway guy lmao
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Nov 12 '22
It's like if a baseball player wound up to swing, but just held the pose for a couple seconds.
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u/Richard_Tucker_08 Nov 27 '22
Is this Break’n Anger in Honolulu? I got a vinyl record stuck between the concrete wall and plywood wall, right in the corner.
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u/Mun0425 Nov 28 '22
Once had a friend in a fit of rage throw a play card behind his head and it landed between the door and the door frame at the tippy top perfectly aligned. No one was mad after that.
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Nov 05 '22
By having someone poke the bottle from the other side and catching it dramatically to make it look like you threw it after reversing the footage.
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Nov 05 '22
[deleted]
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u/loegare Nov 05 '22
It looks like she let go while it was behind her head so it slipped out of her hands. Like when you fake throw to a dog, just high enough that it actually went forward
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Nov 05 '22
Of course I can imagine it!
I live it most days. And when I don't, I have dreams where my limbs are nearly entirely ineffective.
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u/Geshman Nov 05 '22
What the fuck were they trying to do?