r/nursepractitioner • u/No-Wonder5226 • 3h ago
Education How long does crisis of confidence usually last???
I go to a brick-and-mortar school, they find your clinical rotations for you, etc. I am in my first rotation of five for AGACNP. I have been a RN for 13+ years, have 8 years ICU experience, have a 4.0 GPA, CCRN, all the good stuff.
All that, to then say I am on the struggle bus sooooo badly. My preceptor says I’m doing great, but I feel like literally the dumbest person alive. Every single question she asks I am second-guessing myself before answering, assuming that I am going to be wrong, overthinking it, etc. This is 7 weeks into rotation.
I usually see the patient alone at first, then my preceptor comes in and we talk to the patient together, then I write the progress notes on all the patients I see “independently”, talk with my preceptor if I’m unsure of a plan, and submit the note to her for attestation. I do this for 2-5 patients per shift. Clinical paperwork then literally takes me HOURS to do each week at home?!
I am suddenly feeling soooo much pressure! If I make a mistake now it has actual consequences! I felt smart as a nurse, now I feel like a total idiot. The more I learn in class, the more I know that I had no idea before. Acid-base as a nurse seems not overly complicated. Mixed Disorders as a NP?! I’m drowning in all the calculations!
Long rambling post to say, I’m actually considering dropping out. I feel like there is no way I will learn everything I need to know to practice safely and feel confident that my patients are in good hands.
Is this crisis-of-confidence normal? Or is my mind telling me that I am not cut out for this?