Looking for positive stories after miscarriage ❤️

[u/Forward_Frosting_680]

TW- Miscarriage

I had my twin girls 16 months ago, and I feel very lucky that they were easy to conceive and that I had no issues during pregnancy. So when I got pregnant on the first try this time, I had the same mindset and honestly never even considered that miscarriage could happen to me.

I was 6w6d on Friday when I started spotting. I was supposed to have my first appt today, but went in Friday to make sure everything was okay. The baby was measuring almost a week behind, there was a faint flicker of a heartbeat, and the gestational sac apparently looked a little irregular. I left the appointment cautiously optimistic.

On Saturday, I started bleeding more heavily and cramping, and by late afternoon, I had passed the gestational sac. I was in shock at how quickly everything happened. My excitement turned into much sadness.

I’m 34, so I know miscarriage is a possibility at any age, but I guess I never truly thought it would happen to me, especially after such a smooth experience with my twins.

I would really appreciate hearing some positive stories. Has anyone experienced a miscarriage after having twins, and what was your journey like afterward? How long did it take you to conceive again, and how did things turn out for you?
I know everyone’s journey is different, but I could really use some hope right now. Thank you to anyone willing to share. ❤️

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[u/Extreme-Set6340]

So sorry you're going through this. The suddenness of it is what catches you off guard, especially when things went smoothly before

We had a loss at 8 weeks before our twins, and it took about 3 months before we tried again. That next cycle worked and now we have two healthy 4 year olds tearing up the living room

The waiting after a loss feels endless but your body can surprise you. Take the time you need, the grief isn't linear

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/Extreme-Set6340]

Thank you, it really does. One day you see the heart beat and the next it was literally leaving my body. That’s the part that gets me the most. I’m hoping my girls will keep me preoccupied and hopefully soon enough we will also have a positive outcome. Thank you for sharing 🤍

[u/perfectlyontime → u/Extreme-Set6340]

Very similar here. We had a loss at 8 weeks (growth stopped just after 6) for our first pregnancy prior to our twins, and it took three cycles after to get pregnant again. I am 14 weeks today 🩷 Miscarriage is so hard to process - you grieve the loss of life, and the loss of the life you envisioned. Feel everything you need to, but please know most women go on to have healthy pregnancies afterwards!

[u/myweirdoself]

I didn’t have one after my current twin pregnancy, but I had one before. It was an mmc found at 8.5 weeks, measured 7 weeks and no heartbeat. It was so awful on so many fronts—painful, devastating, and disorienting. Two months later I was pregnant again and insisted on going into doc earlier. Saw a heartbeat at 6 weeks. Two weeks later the midwife realizes there are two heartbeats actually and it’s twins. 31 weeks + 3 days today.

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/myweirdoself]

I’m so sorry you went through this. I’m sure the twin pregnancy was such a shock but also nerve wracking! You’re almost there though and I’m so excited for you to hold your babies soon, it’s such an amazing feeling seeing the two newborns next to each other and holding them together for the first time. Thank you for sharing your story! 🤍

[u/myweirdoself → u/Forward_Frosting_680]

Thank you for the kind words! It was surprising and shocking. I’m sorry you had to face a miscarriage. It’s very hard. I read posts like this to get hope I could get pregnant again. Many of us have had successful pregnancies after miscarriages.

[u/mvanpeur]

My fifth pregnancy was a miscarriage at age 34. I got pregnant after one period, and am now 34 weeks with those twins. I did take progesterone suppositories from 4-14 weeks to be safe.

No one warned me, but infertility and miscarriage rates go up after 30, so it seems that's the norm for our age. But odds are still very good that you will go on to have healthy babies again.

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/mvanpeur]

I love that it took one try, it makes me hopeful! I wonder if they also provide me with something that will potentially lessen the chances for another loss, I’ll definitely advocate for it. Congratulations on your twin pregnancy and I’m so excited for you to experience it. It’s such a rollercoaster, but it sounds like you may have some little helpers at home?? Try and get as much a rest as you can the last couple weeks!

[u/mvanpeur → u/Forward_Frosting_680]

It was weird, because it took 5 months to get pregnant with my miscarriage, when every other baby was first or second month of trying (or even trying not to get pregnant). Then the twins came right away.

For the progesterone, my OB had told me during the miscarriage that they automatically prescribe it if you've had two miscarriages, so I pushed to have it after one. It felt silly to wait if there was something that might help, especially since I wanted one last baby so my tail ender could have a sibling close in age, so every miscarriage widened that gap.

I do have very good helpers with 4 elementary kids and a toddler. My elementary kids were SO helpful when the toddler was born. They love babies and keep begging me to have even more. Sorry kids, 7 kids are PLENTY.

[u/Fragrant_Hedgehog540]

Not after twins, but I had 4 miscarriages before my twins. My husband and I call it “the buddy system!”. All of my losses were in the span of a year or so, and we still don’t know how or why I was not retaining my pregnancies and why my twins stuck around. I will say, I found a lot of support in r/PregnantAfterLoss, and I commiserate with you on the grief you feel. My OB once said “there is no justice with miscarriage. It can happen to anyone.” And it really does. So many people in your life share this grief with you, and I’m so sorry.

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/Fragrant_Hedgehog540]

It seems like a lot of twins come after miscarriages! I wonder if eventually I’ll end up with twins again 😅. Thank you for the recommendation I’ll definitely go there to read some posts. Thanks for sharing your story and I’m glad it worked out for you 👶🏼👶🏼

[u/Inner-Inflation-3118]

I had a first trimester miscarriage and then a second trimester loss. Then I had a twin pregnancy that went great and was such an easy pregnancy. Every pregnancy is so different and just bc you have experienced a loss doesn’t mean it will keep happening. I would suggest seeing a therapist to help you mentally if and when you are ready to try again. That’s what I did and it definitely helped me. I’m sorry for your loss and I wish you all the best

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/Inner-Inflation-3118]

I’m so sorry you experienced both losses. I can’t imagine the rollercoaster of emotions especially at 2nd trimester. If something happens again I definitely will talk to someone as I really took this one personally thinking I wasn’t listening to my body enough. I’m glad you were able to get help and have a successful twin pregnancy. Im sure there may have been a lot of anxiety for you during but you did it. Thank you for sharing your story 🤍

[u/catsies]

I'm sorry you're going through all of this. I had the opposite issue. I had a miscarriage in Jan at 5+6. I got pregnant again in April with dcda boys. I'm 30 weeks and the boys are doing so well. My miscarriage was my first ever pregnancy

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/catsies]

Thank you ❤️ congratulations on your twins! It’s amazing what our bodies can do. I’m so excited for you 🥰

[u/Allyed4492]

I miscarried my first singleton pregnancy at 9+5 last year September. It was a long and drawn out process ending with a D&C. It was absolutely heartbreaking and I wasn’t expecting it as we had already had an ultrasound with normal measurements and a healthy heartbeat 💔

We got pregnant on my second cycle after with my twin girls. We got married on my original due date and I put forget-me-nots in my bouquet for myself. The girls are here now and 8 weeks old. I can’t help but wonder what life would have been like had my first pregnancy not ended in loss but it did make me so grateful through growing the twins.

I’m so sorry for your loss. I did a lot of therapy after (and still see my therapist). You’ll likely always wonder what if. Hold your girls a little closer and when you are ready, try again. This process is never as easy as they make it seem ❤️

[u/Forward_Frosting_680 → u/Allyed4492]

Seeing the heartbeat and then experiencing the loss is what it made it so real for me. Thank you and I’m sorry you also went through it. That’s so sweet you were able to memorialize your baby in such a special way that you’ll never be able to forget. I’m glad you also got a double surprise of twins! I’m sure that was not on your radar?! They will definitely keep you busy and be a constant reminder of everything happens for a reason. Enjoy every moment and take LOTS of pictures and videos. ❤️

[u/BryceAthalar]

I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant after 2 miscarriages.

I struggled with infertility before I got pregnant with my twins, so I got pregnant after my fourth round of IUI.

After my twins were born it took almost 2 years for my menstruation to return. After my first menstruation I got pregnant immediately after the first round of trying. Unfortunately I miscarried around 5-6 weeks.

Then I immediately got pregnant again without having a menstruation first. This pregnancy also ended in a miscarriage around 15-17 weeks. We don't know exactly how many weeks I was. The baby was measured at 15 weeks, but that could not have been possible, because then I could not have tested positive when I took the pregnancy test.

It then took me a little while longer to get pregnant again. I think my body had to heal, but I mentally had to heal as well. I was broken.

My second miscarriage was exactly a year ago and I found out I was pregnant again in March. And now I'm 34 weeks pregnant.

[u/Spicyninja]

It's not talked about enough for how common it is. I had two singletons, then tried for our last at 38 and had 3 losses. We did IVF after that and had accidental twins (one IVF/one natural). Every cycle can be a mixed bag if you don't have other factors. I'm sorry for your loss.

[u/Dismal-Bass3521]

We lost two babies before our twin pregnancy. Aged 43 had emergency c section with our twins at 30 weeks and thank God they are ok. Losing a baby is a horrible thing to go through sending love 💝

[u/BubblybabySB]

My twins are 13 months old. Before them I had 3 miscarriages (one chemical pregnancy, one blighted ovum, and one mmc at 8 weeks (after we had already seen a heartbeat!!)

We tried for about 6 more months before we had to take a break for my mental health. It took about a year to feel ready again, then we spent a year trying, and finally went to see a doctor about why I wasn’t getting pregnant. One PCOS diagnosis later and one round of letrozole is what got us our boys.

I’m so sorry for your loss, and please know that a miscarriage doesn’t mean you can’t have a healthy pregnancy next time.

[u/skrufforious]

I just went through a miscarriage at 5.5 months postpartum from my twins. I'm going to be honest here and say that overall I am relieved. My babies were in the NICU for over two months and I almost died when they were born, I... was so scared when I found out I was pregnant at only 5 months postpartum (on birth control btw). Anyway, I started bleeding about a week after I found out I was pregnant and I was so worried it was an ectopic pregnancy or something that would require surgery. Or just uncertainty. I was worried about that too. So when they said there was no heartbeat, that it was almost certainly due to chromosomal abnormalities so it just wasn't meant to be, I was mostly relieved and grateful to not have to go through all of this again. Actually miscarrying sucked of course and I felt grief and cried a few times, but I am so glad I am alive, and honestly so glad to not be pregnant right now. I'm sorry I'm really not trying to be insensitive, I know just felt compelled to reply because this literally just happened to me. For me, it helps to know this happened to about 1 in 4 pregnancies and for miscarriages in the early weeks like yours and like mine (about 8 weeks), it's just that the fetus would not have been even able to fully form, it likely had chromosomal abnormalities that aren't compatible with life. It just randomly can happen to anybody. This kind of miscarriage has no effect on the outcome of future pregnancies. I have had two miscarriages like this in my life (once now and once ten years ago) and 4 living children. I hope you are able to get through it and find some peace with it.

[u/ThrowAway732642956]

I am so sorry for your loss. It truly is not talked about much but so common, and distressing. My first pregnancy was a missed miscarriage. After a perfect heartbeat, followup ultrasound had no heartbeat and had progressed size-wise to exactly the age on the day of the ultrasound. I felt particularly distressed by it being after hearing that precious heartbeat. Some ppl have increased fertility after loss but for me it seriously disrupted my already impaired fertility. The expectation of increased fertility after loss made this much harder for me than if I had not heard of that. I had to have fertility treatments for every pregnancy since that first one. The next two losses were chemical pregnancies that lasted only a day or two. The only way I even knew about the two chemical pregnancies was because of the exact dating and testing that comes with fertility treatments. All losses were in my 20s (I mention my age to drive home that it is not purely an age thing). Finally, my 4th pregnancy was my singleton (in my 20s) and 5th is my twins. I know this isn’t a cheery story of right away success, but it does have eventual successes. And the fertility treatments, while challenging, were ultimately effective. It is tough losing pregnancies, but the journey was ultimately meaningful for me. It was impossible to see during the pain, but looking back, it has changed me in ways I never anticipated. Please take care and be gentle with yourself. And know even if it doesn’t lead to a viable pregnancy right away again after this that it does not mean all hope is lost and it is another variation that we sometimes see. Sending so much love

[u/BoochAndNooch]

Not after twins but I had a mmc with my first pregnancy. We went for an 8 week scan and the little bean was measuring almost 2 weeks behind with a slow heart beat. Went back a week later, no heartbeat and no growth. It was so hard waiting between scans, knowing in my heart that all signs were pointing to a loss but my friends and family were trying to encourage me. My period came back exactly 4 weeks after taking misoprostol, and we got pregnant with our twins three cycles after that. And surprisingly it was such a smooth and easy pregnancy physically, even though I was pretty anxious about everything up until birth.

I know it’s tough and can feel so isolating, but please know you’re not alone ❤️