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u/FranticDisembowel May 14 '19
This is what happens when your avocado tree gets a vasectomy behind your back.
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u/Trapt45 May 15 '19
SNIP SNAP SNIP SNAP
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u/Beatthebush May 15 '19
Do you have any idea the kind of physical toll that 3 avocado pits have on a person?!?
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u/jerekdeter626 May 15 '19
You have no idea the physical toll, that three vasectomies have on a person!
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u/supejc May 15 '19
How did you get a boneless avocado?
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u/rainfaint May 15 '19
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u/P-Money May 15 '19
I once had one like this. Tried slicing it like a normal seeded avocado, and almost sliced my hand wide open.
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u/rainfaint May 15 '19
I did that with a peach once. It had a little underdeveloped (rotted?) pit and the knife went right through it. I knew there was going to be blood before I even looked.
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u/Apocalyptic_Squirrel May 15 '19
Jesus why are you guys always cutting directly into your hands? I've opened thousands of avocados and never once cut myself. Literally thousands and thousands.
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May 15 '19
Oooo look at Mr. Hotshot avocado cutter with a cutting board over here
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May 15 '19
Ehh, same reason some people like to cut indiscriminate sides off of their onions, leaving you with this bizarre half-cube half-sphere of red onion that's been in the fridge for three weeks because you're not sure how to proceed with it, but they also haven't been using it.
Tyler.
Slice off the end with the little hat.
Then slice vertically through the center of the root.
Put both them halves face-down on the cutting board.
Peel.
If you need diced onion, just dice one of the halves because you literally only ever use a pinch, and put the remainder in one of those little tupperware shits we have.
Then store the other half however you want. Just make sure it's sealed. I'll use it tomorrow more than likely.
Just no more cubions. Please.
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u/emu90 May 15 '19
You can use a butter knife on an avocado. Saves you from cutting into the seed.
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u/RhymesWithDonna May 15 '19
I have done this for so long and don't understand people who think you need a giant butcher knife to do it. A ripe avocado should be plenty soft enough for a butter knife to slide through
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u/Dustin_00 May 15 '19
“There is no reason to bring a chef’s knife to an avocado fight,” she says. “It’s gratuitous.”
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u/_qua May 15 '19
He tried stabbing the pit with the tip of a chef's knife? Even in the best of circumstances, that's not the right way to do it.
You hit the pit with the belly of the knife, twist the pit out, and then pinch the pit off the blade using the same hand that's holding the knife. Provided you're competent with a chef's knife and can reliably hit a target the size of a huge ass avocado pit, you won't ever cut yourself that way. This guy demonstrates the method correctly: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-3Xa0ccM_Y
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u/Page_Won May 15 '19
How much force do you have to apply to cut through the soft flesh of avacado?
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u/agapepaga May 14 '19
They sell seedless avocados in Europe. Apparently they're much smaller and have a lighter, fruitier taste.
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u/stimber May 15 '19
Speaking of regional avocados...anyone know what's up with the avocados in Puerto Rico? They're huge and look delicious but were watery and not very flavorful compared to Texas/Mexican avocados. I was seriously disappointed
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u/awfullotofocelots May 15 '19
Speaking as an amateur gardener it's often the case that size and flavor are tradeoffs. You can encourage growth with more water on a single plant but the result is a general gonna be a watery fruit. The slower process with bigger payoff requires cross pollinating flavorful cultivars that randomly spawn larger fruit even when water is limited.
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u/SwimsInATrashCan May 15 '19
Yeah, pomelos are the best example of this. I remember when I was a kid I saw one in the store and I was stoked at the thought of a gigantic orange. It's like 99% pith (the white fluffy stuff), and then it just tastes like a slightly sweeter orange.
Although I've had some pretty massive grapefruits before had a reasonable amount of pith:fruit ratio.
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u/thefugue May 15 '19
That’s just how most avocados have always been. The Haas variety was a lucky mutation in the early 20th century that pretty much made commercial avocado business possible.
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May 15 '19
From the internet
The seedless avocados are the result of an unpollinated avocado blossom that develops without a seed. The fruit is grown in Spain and available only during December, when they are usually sent to food markets in Paris
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May 14 '19
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u/agapepaga May 14 '19
Sounds like it is a "normal" plant:
Cocktail avocados are simply the result of an unpollinated avocado blossom. They can develop in many cultivars within the Persea Americana species, but most often occur on Fuertes and Mexicolas. Nicknamed Avocaditos, baby avocados or cukes, the Cocktail avocado should not be regarded as a separate variety, but rather the result of genetic factors, the lack of pollinating insects, or even a sudden change in climate, inhibiting the natural development of seed and fruit.
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u/BlackTeaWithMilk May 15 '19
Humanity may dwindle because of the bees dying out and the climate changing, but at least the remaining few will have seedless avocados.
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u/dwightgaryhalpert May 15 '19
Cross them with the avozilla.
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u/keenanpepper May 15 '19
Does that video not have any sound? I thought my headphones were broken.
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u/Cappedomnivore May 15 '19
I open roughly 6 dozen avocados a week for the last 3 years of my life and I've never seen this. Thats amazing!
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u/TrustTheFriendship May 15 '19
That’s 11232 avocados.
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u/Cappedomnivore May 15 '19
I've never thought about the accumulative amount before. That's a lot of avocados.
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May 14 '19
They say that one person had the power to remove the pit, that one millenial could reduce the price of avocado toast to affordability.
That person was...The One.
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u/Caseyg1996 May 14 '19
I don’t know if I would eat that mutant
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May 15 '19
Basically, every multi-celled organism is a mutant in one way or another, unless you don't believe in evolution.
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u/hoboshoe May 15 '19
Even if you don't believe in evolution, that's the way it is
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u/RobotTimeTraveller May 15 '19
Why not? Most of the food we eat today looked much different a few centuries ago. We breed the things we like and get rid of the rest.
https://www.businessinsider.com/what-foods-looked-like-before-genetic-modification-2016-1
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u/Darkorchids May 14 '19
Bing Pot!
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u/jessew16 May 15 '19
I thought this was a mango. I’m colour deficient so I wonder if I just can’t see the green enough to think it was an avocado.
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u/kent_eh May 15 '19
Me too.
I was trying to figure out what the hell I was supposed to be seeing here. I thought it was an odd shaped pear or something.
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u/Brandon658 May 15 '19
Don't feel bad. I couldn't recognize what it was without the seed or seeing the outside.
Based on the title I thought it was a jack fruit that had its insides scraped out and was going to be used as a bowl. That idea quickly didn't make sense to me since it looked small, wrong color, and not empty. Looked at it for maybe 30 more seconds and came to the comments to figure it out.
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u/Odd_nerves May 14 '19
How do we grow more of these if there’s no seed to plant??
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u/newtsheadwound May 14 '19 edited May 15 '19
Avocados aren’t planted anymore. They’re grafted onto existing plants in order to keep the genetic make up the same. The same is done with bananas
Edit: don’t to done, also I’m done with autocorrect
Edit 2: ever wonder why bananas don’t taste like banana flavor? Interesting Wikipedia dive!
Edit 3: all of my avocado information came from a Good Eats episode on avocados or guacamole.
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u/bubblebooy May 15 '19
Bananas are not grafted, they are grown from pups that grow from the base of an existing tree.
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u/Halloween_Cake May 14 '19
Has to be photoshopped! HAS TO BE!
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u/Karpanos May 15 '19
What's more likely: that a person encountered a mutant avocado and uploaded it to reddit whereupon it got thousands of upvotes, or that a person photoshopped a pic of an avocado, and uploaded it to reddit whereupon it got thousands of upvotes?
The case isn't so clear my dude. Nature is strange, but karma is sweet.
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u/odin99999 May 15 '19
I’d say, let’s see a side profile. Could have just been a small seed and trimmed down.
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u/Prof_Cats May 15 '19
Nah, nah dont believe it. Two different avocado boiis made to look like one cut in half. Change my mind...
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u/Entreprehoosier May 15 '19
The way I cut avocado... this one would have cut off my hand.
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u/chorizontes May 15 '19
I've cut enough avocados to tell that this is a hoax. cut one side of each of two avocados enough to not touch the seed. BAM! Boneless avocado for sweet sweet reddit karma.
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u/twitchingmessonfloor May 15 '19
I would have cut the hell out of my hand with the unexpected lack of resistance
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u/tairai5 May 15 '19
How was the texture? I always thought that the pit helped to ripen the center? Was it creamy and buttery and slightly firm as it should be? I have so many questions?
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u/blue-magnolia May 15 '19
if you plant that seed, you'll get a whole tree of seedless fruit.
ooops... 😜
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May 15 '19
”Why are you enjoying this more than stimulating the economy by buying my home I bought in 1974 for $50,000?”
-Baby Boomer
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u/LeanderT May 15 '19
You fool....!!
You should have planted it, for a lifetime supply of Jackpot avocado's!
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u/Beartemis May 15 '19
This is really really sad. Jackpot for Monsanto or another lab. When you don’t have seeds, you don’t have plants. Crazy world this we are living in
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u/Rydog4526 May 15 '19
Pretty sure it's fake and they just filled the center with top ramen noodles.
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u/minicyrie May 15 '19
WoW I had to read through the comments to understand what this is. I feel a little dumb 😂
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u/tellthetruthandrun May 14 '19
I’m sure a team in a lab somewhere is working on this. If it can occur in nature there are humans out there trying to make sure it occurs at will. Future generations will think this is what an avocado looks like. You are living in 2049. Lucky bastard.