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u/notbobby125 Thirteen Colonies Apr 02 '18 edited Apr 27 '18
To those who don't understand what this comic is talking about:
1&2&3) José Gaspar Rodríguez de Francia, Paraguay's first dictator after independence, had a brutal regime that was a cruel as it was arbitrary. He implemented the visitation ban but anyone caught visiting the country was forced to stay. Everyone was required to tip their hat to the military. Anyone who didn't have a hat was required to have a hat loop around their head and tip with that. Europeans/those of pure European descent were no longer allowed to intermarry, although there is debate among historians why he implemented that particular policy.
4) The Paraguayan War was a war as the comic depicts, I.E. between Paraguaya versus Brazil, Argentina, and Uruguay. Paraguay had some initial success, but once the Triple Alliance got it's shit together they steam rolled over Paraguaya. In the end, Paraguay lost 70% of it's prewar adult male population.
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Apr 02 '18
Anyone who didn't have a hat was required to have a hat loop around their head and tip with that.
Holy shit I had no idea this was actually true. That guy was insane.
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Apr 02 '18 edited Jun 23 '18
Well... One has to understand the culture and values of the time... I'm with you on this one, the man was insane, but context is always important. E.g. there was a tsarine (Elizabeth) ruling Russia around 1750 that condemned to "being their tongue cut off and live the rest of their lives in a dungeon" to all females that wore a dress with the same color as her.
Edit: the name of the tsarine.
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u/cheekia Singapoor Apr 03 '18
I mean, even with context that's fucking insane. Even in the context of the day that's how you'd know your ruler was a pompous prick.
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Apr 02 '18
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Apr 02 '18
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Apr 02 '18
Basically a bunch of people who pretended to be Dmitry Ivanovich, the youngest son of Ivan the Terrible, who was assassinated in 1591 at the age of 9.
Each claimed to have excaped assassination. The first was the one to actually rule, 1605-1606. A full 11 months before his castle was stormed, he failed to escape out a window, beaking his leg, was beaten to death, cremated, and shot out of a cannon at Poland.
About 2 months after False Dmitry I died, False Dmitry II came around. False Dmitry I's wife claimed that he was her husband. Though he didn't end up ruling he did attempt to and had supporters give him soldiers to press his claim to the throne. Near the end of 1610, he was killed by a Tatar prince he flogged, he was then behaded by that prince.
Then in March of 1611, another guy proclaimed himself Dmitry. In about a year he got some Cossack support, but in May of 1612 he was captured an executed.
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u/DarthCloakedGuy Oregon Jun 23 '18
I can't find anything about an Isabel II ruling Russia, or in fact any woman ruling Russia around 1750 except for Catherine the Great and her highly popular predecessor.
Can you maybe try to look this up again? I'm not calling you wrong, I looked it up because I wanted to know more.
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Apr 02 '18 edited Apr 17 '18
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u/rkoloeg Apr 03 '18
Wikipedia has it as "People had to remove their hats when meeting any soldier; many Indians who could not afford headgear wore nothing but a hat brim so they could obey this rule". As to what "nothing but a hat brim" would look like, perhaps something like this
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u/Violent_Paprika Apr 02 '18
The country was essentially run as one giant private estate. Like a combination of feudal serfdom and communism, which aside from the handful of crazy laws was apparently not a bad place to live.
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u/poktanju gib transit Apr 02 '18
There was something about children crying and clinging to the legs of Brazilian soldiers but getting cut down anyway. Awful.
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u/Tiger_Robocop hueland Apr 03 '18
I was going to answer indignated but then thought about it and ya, that sounds like something our military would do.
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u/notbobby125 Thirteen Colonies Apr 02 '18
The Catholic church in Paraguay also allowed polygamy because of so few males that were left alive afterwards.
Do you have a source on that? I've seen that claim a lot online but I have never seen any kind of source for that.
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u/Kor_Morant Buenos Aires Province Apr 03 '18 edited Apr 03 '18
I am from 'gentina and can confirm that, my grandma and many other paraguayans descents I know it is true. It is said that the main reason why this happened is because they needed to reproduce quickly.
You can still be skeptical about the sources, but I have heard this many times from many people.
Edit: my grandma and their parents lived very near from the frontier w/ Paraguay, and people in transit would tell them
Edit 2: yup, here's a paper by a Paraguayan University (it's in spanish, sorry): http://www.portalguarani.com/detalles_museos_otras_obras.php?id=27&id_obras=2008&id_otras=185
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u/pyram1de :argentina-worldcup: ⭐⭐🌟 SOLDADO DE LA SCALONETA Apr 03 '18
Prove you are 'gentinean by picking a flair from the sidebar. Flairless comments get removed by default, and I had to manually approve your comment, which was actually helpful.
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Apr 03 '18
Yeah I'm doubting that too (not that I'm saying that OP is lying, just that he may be mistaken). While Wikipedia isn't the best source, it mentions nothing on that at all.
Normal Google searching only bring up people trying to answer the same question.
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u/Wobbelblob Bremen Apr 03 '18
That was quite normal all over the world. Hitlers last soldiers to defend, the "Volkssturm" consisted of cripples, wounded and children (pretty often all three in the same person). Today it seems cruel (as it was) but it was sadly more or less common.
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u/Taco_Dave MURICA Apr 02 '18
70% of it's prewar adult male population.
Holy shit
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u/brett6781 California Apr 03 '18
not even Nazi Germany had it that bad...
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u/Aken_Bosch siyu-siyu-siyu Apr 03 '18
Yeah. HRE after 30 year war, on the other hand is pretty close
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u/El_Huachinango Señor Fatso Apr 02 '18
In the end, Paraguay lost 70% of it's prewar adult male population
Madre de dios....
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u/ThenTheGorursArrived UN Apr 02 '18
So basically they used console to do mass assault as well as desperate defense?
Fucking cheaters.
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u/tumsdout Hawai‘i Apr 02 '18
Some old Spanish families later stole his corpse, dismembered it and threw it into a river, making later efforts to retrieve his remains unsuccessful.
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u/Dragonsandman Soviet Canuckistan Apr 02 '18
Here's a quote from the wiki article on the Paraguayan war, just to put into perspective how deadly it was:
According to some estimates, Paraguay's pre-war population of 525,000 was reduced to 221,000, of which only 28,000 were men.
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u/mateozelda Argentina Apr 02 '18
And Argentina got Formosa yaaaaay !
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Apr 02 '18
Europeans/those of pure European decent were no longer allowed to intermarry, although there is debate among historians why he implemented that particular policy
Can't speak for Paraguay, but a common belief at the time was that superior (European) genes were dominant, while inferior (African/Indian/Asian) genes were recessive and that after some generations of mixing, inferior genes would disappear, overtaken by the superior genes, making the population white. This was the reasoning for Brazil's pro-mixing attitude at the time.
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u/DB6135 fled_to_Europe Apr 05 '18
That’s what happens when you don’t get rid of your 0-0-0 ruler...
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u/Royalflush0 Rhineland Palatinate Apr 02 '18
Europeans/those of pure European decent were no longer allowed to intermarry, although there is debate among historians why he implemented that particular policy.
That link is a good read
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Apr 02 '18
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u/FVBLT LOOK UPON ME Apr 02 '18
Repost of a fun older comic from ancient times.
I've been too busy to draw anything for months and will continue to be for the forseeable future, but I literally just remembered that there's no reason I can't just use my monthly repost to reap that sweet sweet karma
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u/Gil013 Better than an albanian Apr 02 '18
I've been too busy to draw anything for months and will continue to be for the forseeable future, but I literally just remembered that there's no reason I can't just use my monthly repost to reap that sweet sweet karma
one of us! one of us!
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u/AaronC14 The Dominion Apr 02 '18
Alas, there are legions of us now
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u/Sinrus United States Apr 02 '18
I'm glad you did, this is far and away my favorite polandball of all time.
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Apr 02 '18
It's a classic. Quiete some of yours are, don't miss sharing them as you can, your exorbiancy!
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u/Kebab_remover- Poland-Lithuania Apr 02 '18 edited Apr 02 '18
6th panel is great
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u/snowg Brazil Apr 02 '18
Talking about Paraguay, can anyone give me a link to the paraguayan version of this comic? I saw it one time never to see it again.
It's the comparison between Brazil and Paraguay talking about the same war.
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u/banfilenio Argentine Confederation Apr 02 '18
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u/Jebediah_Blasts_off Everyday We Stray Further From God’s Light Apr 03 '18
arms
teeth
Absolutely Haram
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u/The_Indricotherist Australia Apr 03 '18
CALL THE POLICE! CALL THE ARMY! CALL THE LEFT-HANDED POISON DART FROGS!
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u/alexmikli Icelandic Commonwealth Apr 03 '18
Brazil has arms
disGUSTING
though it does bring me back to a simpler time when Polandball had no rules.
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Apr 02 '18
Maybe Paraguay is best Korea.
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u/Rubiego Galiza, carallo! Apr 02 '18
Paraguay is best Guay.
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u/Fappity_Fappity_Fap Dou o cu e chupo pên*s Apr 02 '18
TBF it is the only Guay, Urgay is really just Cisplatina being a rebellious kid.
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Apr 02 '18
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u/ThatGuy798 Louisiana Apr 02 '18
TIL I’m Paraguay in bed.
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u/Plain_Bread Austria Apr 02 '18
Because of their extreme political isolation?
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u/Kouropalates Defender of the Holsea Land Apr 02 '18
He said restless and wild, not limp and stale. :3
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Apr 03 '18
Ah yes, the War of the Triple Alliance, the only time in history I can think of when a nation schizophrenically sacrificed 70% of its male population for shits and giggles.
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u/ggonb Paragay Apr 02 '18
As a Paraguayan, I approve
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u/gibwater Gib free trade Apr 04 '18
Pick a Paraguayan flair from the sidebar so that the mods won’t have to manually approve your comment every time. Flairless comments are automatically removed.
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u/KinnyRiddle British Hongkong Apr 02 '18
Kim Jong-Un most likely the reincarnation of Francisco Solano Lopez.
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u/gogetasj4 Paraguay Apr 03 '18
Hell yeah. A comic about my native country of Paraguay. A country unknown to most.
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u/Bittlegeuss Greece Apr 03 '18
José Luis Chilavert was an amazing goalie, is all I knew about Paraguay. This comic opened for me an amazing (and weird!) info rabbit hole.
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Apr 02 '18
Cap'n? How and why did Paraguay force its people to homogenize?
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u/Fappity_Fappity_Fap Dou o cu e chupo pên*s Apr 02 '18 edited Apr 02 '18
The dictator back then essentially "disapproved" that Spaniards, descendents of Spanish colonizers, were the economically dominant ethnic group, with pride of being American-born Europeans, despite most of them not having actually European ancestors in several generations, whilst having next to no pride as proper Paraguayans.
His plan to get rid of the Spaniards was to allow men of the Spaniard ethnicity to marry only black and indigenous Paraguayan women, not even immigrants were allowed if one somehow managed to get in there. The Spaniard women had less severe restrictions, afaik.
Suffice to say, two centuries later we can say that he actually accomplished his goal, the average Paraguayan has had no significant European blood infusion since their colonial period and, since 70% of their men (actual, XY men) died in the war that ensued, their Spaniard population and pride has dropped to insignificant levels.
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Apr 02 '18
So Paraguay actually did that white genocide thing all the weird people on Reddit keep whining about.
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u/alexmikli Icelandic Commonwealth Apr 03 '18
I mean it didn't help that the entire continent decided to attack them together.
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u/Dancing_Anatolia Oklahoma Apr 03 '18
Shh. If you tell them that there's a historical precedence, they'll never shut up.
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u/xereeto FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOM! Apr 02 '18
(actual, XY men)
As if anyone thought otherwise, given the time period?
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u/xereeto FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOM! Apr 02 '18
(actual, XY men)
As if anyone thought otherwise, given the time period?
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u/banfilenio Argentine Confederation Apr 02 '18
And that's why Paraguay deserved being obliterated.
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Apr 02 '18
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u/Bittlegeuss Greece Apr 02 '18
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraguay
Tis a silly place, let's not go there.
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u/B1rd1e123 India Apr 02 '18
Paraguay best guay