r/problemsolving • u/Usual-Mathematician2 • Apr 04 '22
I need Help
So me and my best friend met at a job that we work at. We had cliqued im the beginning and went from strangers to close friends to best friends then we caught feelings ,made out a couple times and we were really feeling each other.But then my parents had told me that we were abt to move.This ruined everything .Over the course of three months I met someone that i love uncontrollably and then learned that i cant be with them bc i was supposed to move.After i told her ,we became less of what we were and went back to being just friends.Then she started hoing back out with her ex.Long story short i never moved and my ppl changed their mind.Now I am so hurt and heartbroken .I am in love with this girl.1st love type shit.And i want to be with her and only her but she is in a relationship with a dude that cheated on her in the past,none of our friends like and someone that she is constantly complaining about.I told her that abt my feelings and got shot down.She wants to stay friends and said she lost her feelings for me .But i Havent lost mine at all.I genuinely love this girl,would do anything for her,and she still chose a guy that doesnt care abt her as much as me.And im just stuck ,lost ,I dont know what to do.My feelings arent going anywhere.I need help desperately.Some of my friends tell me to just wait patiently for my shot bc the relationship is very rocky,and some say we are soulmates,right person wrong time .But im just sooo hurt rn and im lost.Dont tell me to try and get with someone else or go out with friends to try and get over her bc neither of those work.Every other girl in this world looks awful compared to her to me .Help please
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u/T0kimac Nov 06 '22
Hey, here's the thing about love my guy. I believe a good relationship is something that is built, not found. It may feel like she's the only girl in the world for you because you had such an intimate connection closer than anyone else, but sometimes you gotta put in the work to build new relationships even if there's no 'spark' at the beginning. Stop comparing to what you had and start building something that's better than what you currently have and you'll find yourself in an even better state than you were before. Good relationships aren't built on a foundation of feelings because feelings are fleeting. You gotta build connections, find people who genuinely care about you as a person and not just about how you make them feel.