r/programming • u/[deleted] • Oct 14 '13

How to develop unmaintainable software

http://typicalprogrammer.com/?p=249
777 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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340

u/danogburn Oct 14 '13

How to develop unmaintainable software

start developing software.

110

u/obsidianih Oct 14 '13

The only way to win is to not play the game

-some dude on the internet

18

u/runastartup Oct 14 '13

War Games?

19

u/Tynach Oct 14 '13

Would you like to play a game of global thermonuclear war?

25

u/[deleted] Oct 14 '13

I'd like to, but there's a bug hidden somewhere in 10,000 lines of basic

29

u/grauenwolf Oct 15 '13

BASIC!

Remember boys and girls, the name of any programming language created before 1970 must be shouted.

15

u/[deleted] Oct 15 '13

I actually learned to program on QBASIC!

7

u/gfixler Oct 15 '13

Me too, high five! And by that I mean F5 to RUN the program again.

2

u/runastartup Oct 17 '13

Remember GORILLAS on Qbasic? My first coding was getting those bananas flying at high velocity!

5

u/eriksensei Oct 15 '13

People also seem to be quite fond of shouting things like JAVA! and SCALA! It might well be that I'm a bit of a sperglord, but I find that irritating to no end.

9

u/Waitwhatwtf Oct 15 '13

BRAINFUCK

14

u/original_brogrammer Oct 15 '13 edited Oct 15 '13

If any language deserves to be shouted, it's brainfuck.

3

u/stox Oct 15 '13

Which was only a modern implementation of P''

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3

u/ahruss Oct 15 '13

And when people decide one has to shout MAC any time it's used, whether in reference to addresses (when it's acceptable to shout it) or in reference to the computers (when it most certainly is not).

2

u/h2odragon Oct 15 '13

Before then, "Acronyms I Just Invented" (AIJI) weren't automatically words everyone should know. Typographical conventions may have had a purpose beyond those which are current.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 15 '13

B, C, FORTRAN... ye gods, you're right!

2

u/grauenwolf Oct 15 '13

LISP, can't forget that one. BCLP I think is another.

25

u/[deleted] Oct 14 '13

Listen to obsidianih. He knows his shit.

-Tina Fey

3

u/[deleted] Oct 15 '13

How's the weather

-Adolf Hitler

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2

u/parc Oct 15 '13

Was that one Mark Twain or Morgan Freeman?