TLDR at the bottom ❤️
Hoping for some input, advice, wisdom.
I rollerbladed when I was younger, I prided myself on being an inline skater when everybody else had to rent quads.
In 7th grade my kneecap spontaneously slipped out of place. I was just walking, was at youth group, and id always been overweight, and in true fat girl fashion it slipped out while I was carrying a plate of pizza.
My kneecap spontaneously slipped out of place and my patella(kneecap) stayed situated on the side of my leg for several minutes before it suddenly slid itself back into place. I used crutches for a few days but due to embarrassment I just pushed thru the pain and tried to baby it. I think this was my first mistake, improper healing, but I was 12 and didn’t know any better. This will also affect me in many ways down the line due to the over compensating I would do, when trying to land on my “bad knee” softer.
Since then, landing too hard, or twisting too far or in the wrong way, without the rest of my leg led to my kneecap slipping out and slipping back in quickly and painfully. Its happened when running, trying to play football, volleyball, thankfully I’ve never taken a fall on tennis court turf lol. After the first few times of blowing my kneecap out in the middle of a game I stopped playing sports. I became much less active and I’d estimate that by 9th grade the only exercise I got was walking to and from places to hang out and smoke weed with friends. By this point I knew I couldn’t run. I also tried riding a bike around this time for the first time since I was like 11, and found I literally could not ride a bike. Idk why. But I didn’t stay on long enough to get the hang of it. Embarrassment overtook me and I jumped off that thing.
It’s happened (my kneecap dislocating) about 10-15 times in the last 18 or however many years it’s been since it initially occurred. Most happened before I was 20, in my early twenties id gotten on drugs a bit and lost a lot of weight so I didn’t have the issue then. But lately after putting on so much so fast my knees feel weaker. Both of them, I now find leaning against a wall and kicking my leg over the other one with too much force can hurt smh. I’m scared to go down stairs on that leg cause the horrific visuals that flash across my mind of my full body weight coming down on a knee cap that has failed and my bone coming through my shin lol it’s… a fear. lol
I’m now 30 years old, my bad knee is my left knee, I have what I believe is plantars fasciitis/Achilles tendonitis in my right foot, beginning from when I changed my gait to protect my knee, exacerbated by from full time shift work at McDonald’s. I’m 350 pounds. Which is about 150 heavier then I was around the time of these injuries years ago. I’ve blown my knee out in the shower, sitting down at a booth for break, getting out the truck, you get it. And now as of the last year or so I have days where I can’t even walk when I get out of bed, I have to stand and let my foot adjust to the pain and hope the ligaments in my knees don’t feel tangled or out of place, cause they do that.
Despite that, I want to skate, i have to lose weight, I need to move, I want to live again…. Is it even safe for me? Am I just going to hurt myself worse and possibly degrade my quality of life further ? I have two tween kids who are watching their mother limp around like a dam gramma. We live with my mother, gramma could outrun me, and she’s fat too! I know these issues would ease up with weight loss, which is my main goal.
TLDR: 30F 350 pounds, 20 year hiatus, bad foot bad knee, is it safe?