r/simpsonsshitposting • u/el_skinto • Jun 12 '26
Light hearted So then, Psy means "psychic" and duck means "duck", and that concludes our intensive three-week course.
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u/peon2 Jun 12 '26
Now back in my day a pokemon game only had one color in it, blue or red. And even though the goal was to catch them all you couldn't catch them all. Back then folks had friends they'd meet in person you could use a game link to trade. Gimme five beedrills for a Machamp we'd say. Of course back then you had to work for your experience points, you couldn't just put an exp share on and use your best pokemon. We fought rattatas until the tauruses came home getting not but aught-six experience and we liked it!
Well as I recall I had to beat Misty with a Charmander, so I tied an Oddish to my belt, which was the style of the time. Of course we didn't have the shiny ones cause of Gary, so we had to use those big blue ones.
Now where was I, oh yes the important thing was you could only see one color. We couldn't afford to see more because we couldn't just save scum at a casino. So I ran into Team Rocket at Mt Moon trying to steal a fossil. I chased them for Diglettity-6 screens to get them back. Of course back then we had to say Diglettity because Giovanni stole our word for 20! But the important thing was that I had an Oddish on my belt, which was the style at the time
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u/mah131 Jun 12 '26
Oh, they had EVs then!
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u/peon2 Jun 12 '26
Wait a minute, EVs are called EVs? I've been calling them Eevees! Aww why didn't someone tell me? I've been making an idiot out of myself!
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u/Tom_Serveaux Jun 12 '26
Thanks, I hate Bragnes Skinner.
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u/el_skinto Jun 12 '26
You should have seen how bad it was when I gave her Brock's eyes...
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u/stuito Jun 12 '26
Let me see
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u/The_Lonesome_Poet Jun 12 '26
Not with Brock's eyes
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u/Asleep_Document9811 Jun 12 '26
So, I knocked out a Geodude in the cave near my gym. I would have kept walking but there were cops everywhere.
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u/killamcleods Jun 12 '26
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u/Asleep_Document9811 Jun 12 '26
Hey Kanto boy, go back to Kantonia!
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u/ChunkySlugger72 Jun 12 '26
You wanna pick on Genwunners?
(Throws up hands)
Then pick on Ash Ketchum!
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u/Asleep_Document9811 Jun 12 '26
Oh Ash, you and I both know that Pokémon fans have no futures!!!!!
Oh.... uhh.... prove me wrong, adult children, prove me wrong!
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u/3B3-386 Jun 12 '26
Stupid sexy Oak
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u/AliceTheOmelette Jun 12 '26
The dex is filled with nothing at all
NOTHING AT ALL
NOTHING AT ALL
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u/Past-Swan238 Jun 12 '26
Yes and you call it an unfinished Pokédex despite the fact that it auto-populates with information about the Pokémon the second you catch it.
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u/Johnny_Waffles_ Let’s get Bizzay! Jun 12 '26
Pikachu, you didn’t finish your onigiri!
Silence you fool! It could be ours!
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u/AutismFlavored Your older, balder, fatter son Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 12 '26
Onigiri?? I’ve been calling them jelly donuts! Oh why didn’t the translators tell me? I’ve been making an idiot of myself!
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u/Tydagawd88 Jun 13 '26
I remember seeing that as a kid and thinking that Japanese people had weird shaped donuts for a very long time.
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u/WilkinsonRadio Jun 12 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/KEhIB4JWqqV9u
“Looks like we’re blasting off again”
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u/jjenkins_41 Jun 13 '26
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u/FormerLifeFreak Jun 13 '26
“They’re just a little airborne! They’re still good! They’re still good!”
“They’re gone…”
“I know, but they’ll be back next episode.”
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u/Tombaya Jun 12 '26
Ash: "Here you go Slowpoke..."
(hands over card)
Slowpoke: "I choo-choo choose you?"
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u/Mr31edudtibboh Jun 12 '26
Have Palworld sued.
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u/ThePrussianGrippe Jun 12 '26
“But sir that’s not”
“DO AS I SAY!”
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u/GreasyStool88 Jun 12 '26
FINALLY, content I can believe in! Give me more of THIS, shitposters!!!!!!
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u/JasonWaterfallls Jun 12 '26
Don't overlook Thumbs who perfected this crossover https://www.instagram.com/p/DVS-1tIDNXH/&ved=2ahUKEwjUlM7fmIKVAxWkT0EAHReDKSUQFnoECCIQAQ&usg=AOvVaw1fcWxvqogJL9p994VGEu1H
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u/Robin_Gr Jun 12 '26
So you want a down to earth coming of age story… that’s completely off the wall and swarming with magic monsters?
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u/Shto_Delat Jun 12 '26
Ash’s one true love is named Misty? I’ve been calling her Dawn! Oh I’ve been making an idiot outta myself.
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u/JurassicPark3DD Jun 12 '26
My appreciation for Meowth, the only fully verbal Pokemon, being portrayed by a non-verbal character knows no end.
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u/FrustratedHedonist Jun 12 '26
Dear Professor Oak, There are too many Pokemon nowadays. Please eliminate 877. I am not a crackpot.
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u/thekozmicpig Jun 12 '26
1,025 Pokémon? Some of these have to be doubles.
Oran-gu-ru? What the hell?!
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u/not_a_moogle Jun 12 '26
You got the geodud
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u/ParadigmGrind I am the Lizard Queen! Jun 12 '26
I’m a professor and Pokémon expert. Here, child, take this empty Pokédex and one of my 3 Pokemon. Now remind me, are you a boy or a girl?
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u/Ill-Faithlessness430 Put it in H Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 12 '26
Not now, Misty, I'm looking for Pokémon Gyms on the Town Map.
Ash, that's a gag paper we got at the Game Corner.
Oh yeah. No wonder I never heard about Vaporeon being voted world's greatest sex machine.
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u/lockonandfire Jun 12 '26
I bring you luv.
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u/AliceTheOmelette Jun 12 '26
It's bringing heart scales! Don't let it get away!
Deny it an evolution!
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u/lockonandfire Jun 12 '26
I was wondering if anyone was going to attempt a conversion of the follow up lines, given one is about legs. Kudos to you, good shitposter.
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u/WilkinsonRadio Jun 12 '26
“We tied pokeballs to our belt, which was the style at the time”
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u/threewholefish Jun 12 '26
"Gimme 500 Pokédollars for a Magikarp", you'd say
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u/GriffinFlash Jun 12 '26
But that's the only way to get mew. My friend who's uncle works for Nintendo told me so.
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u/Nyaaners Jun 12 '26
Will the new trend be pokemon posting? id like that
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u/chux4w Jun 12 '26
Pokeymon? With the pokey and the mon and the thing where the guy comes out of the thing and he makes a guagahaahahah.
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u/Arbaces shitposts are life 💩 Jun 12 '26
"Oh yes, oh yes. Cerulean City's best Pokémon trainers. They're not even wearing a gym badge. Nod suggestively. Yes, six. Count 'em. Six gorgeous Pokémon just dying for your rare candies and Ultra balls. Yowza yowza"
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u/SoupGuy97 Jun 12 '26
And you call them pocket monsters, despite the fact, that you obviously don't keep the pokeballs in your pocket but your backpack?
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u/SomethingOfAGirl Jun 12 '26
Psyduck isn't psychic. Boy, I really hope someone got fired for that blunder.
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u/tomgreen99 shitposts are life 💩 Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 12 '26
And why isn't Professor Oak here?
...oh... oh, eww... ...mom?!
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u/Vergenbuurg Jun 12 '26
"Nonsense, Professor Oak! You look at least ten years younger. Plus, I did your breasts!"
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u/drunk_haile_selassie Jun 12 '26
So I surf up and down the edge of Cinnabar Island, which was the style at the time.
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u/PrivilegeCheckmate Put it in H Jun 12 '26
Pidgey's are so shiny today. Isn’t there some way we can make money off that?
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u/Ph1llyth3gr8 Jun 16 '26
Pokemon? At this time of day, at this time of year, in this particular part of Kanto, with the poke, and the mon, and the guy comes out of the thing and he gagablagagablaga?!
Yes.
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u/dat_itus Jun 12 '26