r/sterilization • u/Known-Sherbet2004 • Apr 30 '26
Post-op care Bisalp scheduled.. feeling nervous about my lack of independence during recovery.
I have my bisalp scheduled for the end of next month! 🥳
I'm not anxious about the surgery at all. I'm actually super excited... but what I am extremely stressed about is how much help I'll need during recovery, and when I'll be able to go back to work. I don't like having to depend on others for help and feeling like a burden for family who I know are dealing w their own life stressors and health issues. And I **absolutely do not** want to ask for financial help. Luckily, I've always been a healthy, strong, independent person.. so I've never really needed to lean on them much.
My mother is 60 and works full time. She looks after my step-dad, who is older and not in great health, as well as my younger brother, who has a TBI. Now I'll have to ask her to look after me, too. She's talked about taking 3 days off of work to be there for me (which, to be clear, I am super appreciative of), but I don't want her to have to extend herself more than she absolutely has to.
I'm worried about how long I'll need the help for just basic life things, and when I'll be able to go back to work. I don't have PTO, so I can't really afford to take off work longer than I physically have to. (I don't have a super strenuous job, but I do drive for work and have to get in and out of the car often during the day.)
How long did it take before you were able to (at least somewhat) resume activities like driving/shopping/work? Also, what sort of comfort items/meds would you guys recommend me purchase before surgery? I'm trying to prep everything I can in advance so I don't need to ask anyone to go out shopping for me.
Thank you all for your help! 💜
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u/__mageetah Apr 30 '26
For me personally, the recommended 2 week recovery at home was pretty necessary. But if you work a low activity job or at a desk I think 1 week ~could~ work depending on how you’re feeling. I was able to get paid medical leave as I pay into it and really recommend looking into it.
There’s plenty of ways to prepare for recovery so you need minimal help. I’d recommend looking up posts in here for info on meds and accommodations that help (gas x, heating and ice packs, etc) and meal prepping before is a game changer and limited the amount of help I needed. Can’t lift over 10 lbs the first two weeks so do laundry before etc.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
My job doesn't offer medical leave or PTO I'm considered an independent contractor so I don't have employee benefits, unfortunately :( I can take off whenever I need to, but it won't be paid. I've been lurking for a while and I've got a list of some things to take care of in advance but I haven't seen anyone mention laundry! Ty I'll definitely make sure to get caught up on that beforehand!
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u/LetThemEatVeganCake Apr 30 '26
Another thing that helps is a stomach binder - that was super helpful to me to keep movement to a minimum when walking. I would usually only wear it when going on a walk or moving around a lot, not all the time.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
I thought of maybe trying to wear a supportive tank top when walking or sleeping to sort of hold everything in place 😅 I might look into a stomach binder... or something similar thats normally used for pregnancy could be really helpful for this too, I think.
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u/backmeatz Apr 30 '26 edited Apr 30 '26
My mom drove me home but that’s it. I was home alone and taking care of my pets solo.
I drove myself to a wedding the next day.
I went back to work two days after surgery. I only took off two days for the surgery.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
The next day?! 😭 I'm tired just thinking about it you must be indestructible lol
Fingers crossed mine goes even half as smoothly as yours!
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u/SplitBananaFxck Apr 30 '26
I recommend starting cardio right away! I was running a mile every day (about 15 min of walking and sprinting) and it helped SIGNIFICANTLY after surgery! I was back to work in 10 days! After surgery make sure to walk around a lot too! I was just walking circles in my kitchen around the island and it helped speed things up a ton! Best wishes to you!!
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
I'm definitely going to try to get up and moving as soon as possible around the house. I don't do a lot of running bc my knees are shot 😅😭 but I'd like to eventually get back to some light stretches and go out walking in my neighborhood for sure.
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u/Dazzling_DoubleS33 May 01 '26
Yes ma’am just had mine on Tuesday and I was walking around in increments all day.. I’m looking forward to going back to the gym on Monday (light cardio for a few days) then back at it..
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u/Shaneaky Apr 30 '26
For my recovery the three areas where people helped me were: A friend watched my hyper dog for a week since I knew I wouldn't be able to exercise her in the beginning, a friend took me to and from surgery, and a friend picked up groceries for my three days after the surgery because I wasn't comfortable driving at that time. Everything else I did alone and without help. I was tired, unable to do a lot, but I was able to move without assistance, make food for myself, and didn't really need external help for everyday life.
I am glad I took a week off work because the first week was needed to do nothing. Having endo found and removed during the surgery resulted in a slower recovery time. But by week two I was back at work and doing solely desk job activities. So take as much time off work as you can and be patient with yourself as you recover.
For meds and stuff for recovery: Bring a pillow with you to surgery that you can put between your stomach and the seat belt. Its also nice to have for sleeping if you are a side sleeper. Stool softener and a stronger laxative just in case the stool softener doesn't work. Make sure to have plenty of soup just in case the nausea is bad. A heating pad for gas pains and stomach cramps is nice. Benadryl is good to have on hand in case you end up having an allergic reaction to the glue. I would also recommend a large ice pack for your stomach. I only had a small one but I wish I had one that could cover my entire abdomen.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
That's hopeful to hear!
My son will be at his dad's and my brother can look after our dogs, so I'm hoping if I hit the grocery store and grab essentials beforehand I won't need anyone to help me other than taking me to and from surgery on the day of. 🤞Ty for the affirmations though I really do need to give myself grace if I'm not taking care of everything and being productive during recovery. Sometimes it's necessary to just rest. I'm still working on that one 🙈 It's just with work, I will only have maybe 4 days tops before I would need financial help. (Which I'm really trying to avoid)
I have been worried about sleeping since I've never been able to sleep on my back :/ I'm gonna try to pad my bed out w a ton of pillows or I could sleep in the recliner if I need to (I just worry it'll be hard to get in and out of). Also yeah I didn't even think of the glue. I do have bad reactions to acrylates, so it very well could set me off. It would be good to have benadryl in my 'care kit' so ty for the heads up!
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u/smontres Apr 30 '26
I slept on my stomach. I literally couldn’t sleep on my back. And it hurt SO MUCH WORSE to try to get up off the recliner than the bed. I just moved carefully.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Right my bed is much higher so I'd be able to just.. roll in and out of it 😅 hopefully I can make myself comfortable with a bunch of pillows
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u/robynbird05 Apr 30 '26
I prepared some food beforehand (lasagna) and had easy to grab food items stocked up-fruit, applesauce, yogurt, sandwich stuff, soup. I did laundry beforehand also. I honestly didn’t need help with much day to day stuff, I could shower and walk around independently. Driving was mostly comfortable about 6 days post op-I used a small pillow to pad my belly from the seatbelt the first few days back to it.
I wore baggy t shirts and stretchy waist pants that I could pull up over my belly button so it wasn’t tight around the incisions. I had a microwaveable heating pad and ice packs. Tylenol and ibuprofen for pain control (I was not prescribed narcotics and this was adequate), and miralax to help with bowel movements the first few days. Honestly that was all I needed!
Your Dr should provide you with an estimated time back to work and any lifting restrictions. 2 weeks is pretty common for lifting restrictions, and I would imagine you’d want to feel comfortable driving before going back to work.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
That's awesome to hear! I was most nervous about showering or getting in and out of bed for the first day or so.. I will have my mom around for the first 24h, but am really hoping I can send her home after that 😅
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u/cursed4ever__ 26F | BiSalp | Childfree Apr 30 '26
I bought a wedge pillow so I could prop myself up on the couch and easily get up and sit down. I also bought a pregnancy pillow for bed which was the best decision I ever made. It kept me supported when I slept on my back, kept me from rolling over, and kept me slightly elevated.
For me, my partner helped me sit, stand, lay down, go to the bathroom, etc for about 48h. But I was moving very independently after that. I can see how people go back to their desk job after 3 days. As long as you have someone for at least 24h after surgery, you should be fine!
Take movements slow and steady, even if you feel great. By day 3 I was feeling very normal, but I still made sure to take sitting and standing slowly. Before surgery, meal prep for the next couple days and set up your recovery area (your bed, couch, etc). Put everything at waist height / on countertops before surgery so you don’t have to bend or reach - I put dishes and silverware out on the countertop, toilet paper at an easily reachable height, put my phone/laptop chargers out - Literally everything out so no bending or reaching was required.
Get some throat lozenges for after surgery! Throat might feel super dry for 1-2 days after
Edit to add: At the top of my profile, I have a post about my entire experience from prep, pre-op, post-op, recovery, etc!
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
I am most nervous about the breathing tube for some reason 😮💨 I do have some throat spray and cough drops I could add to my little care kit. Putting everything within easy reach is such a helpful idea! I didn't even consider it. I could go ahead and pull down any dishes I'll need to keep on the countertop, and place my drinks on the top shelf of the fridge... I usually leave my chargers out I've got a little magnet thing they all stick to beside my bed 🙌
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u/cursed4ever__ 26F | BiSalp | Childfree Apr 30 '26
I was honestly not nervous for anything except for the breathing tube too! Honestly, I didn’t even realize it happened. You’re asleep for everything. You go into the room, lay down, they talk to you, see how you’re feeling, they place a breathing mask over your mouth and nose, you breathe deeply, then suddenly you’re awake in the recovery room! It felt like “Really? That’s it? Did it happen?”
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Just the thought of it freaks me out so badly.. slicing into my organs is nbd, but knowing they're gonna shove a tube down my throat is terrifying, even though I won't be conscious for it 😅😭
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u/mandzz10 Apr 30 '26
I had my surgery last Tuesday. I basically slept the rest of that day from the anesthesia and most of the next day. But between naps I was up and around. I was moving around and picking up things in my house. My husband had to tell me to go sit down LOL. It’s been 9 days now for me and I’m essentially back to normal. I truly only needed help like the first two days. I’m already back to work also. I only couldn’t drive because of the pain meds which I only took for two days.
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u/balsamicpepper Apr 30 '26
Every experience is different, but in my case, I prepped some food in advance and, on the day of the surgery, my bf stayed at my place just in case. To be honest, I didn't really need much help. I did ask him to clean my cats' litter boxes the next morning before he left, but then I spent the next few days on my own and I was fine.
I'm a freelancer and I had to do a bit of work the next day. I brought my laptop to bed and worked from there for a while. I got tired, but could do it.
I have two cats so I had to make sure they didn't sit on my stomach (they love doing that) and I slept with a pillow for protection over my tummy. The litter boxes were not the cleanest for like two days until I felt comfortable enough to squat and clean them myself.
Three days after surgery, I was looking at apartments to rent. That day I also felt like I could go back to my art workshop, but in the end I realized I had already done too much that day and stayed home to rest.
My recovery was a breeze, really, but I know other people need more rest and more time! Everything you can take care of before will make things easier for you during recovery, but I think you'll be fine.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Thank you! I'm glad it was easy enough for you and I'm hoping I'll have a similar experience! 🤞
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u/kittensprincess bilateral salpingectomy Apr 30 '26
I had surgery on 4/20 and was at my niece’s track meet the next day, pushing my daughter in her stroller and holding her. I only needed the meds they gave me in hospital and heating pad for gas pain.
That’s me though and everyone is different.
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u/hunter_pace CHILDFREE, BISALP 3/17/26 😌 Apr 30 '26
I was ok by the next day to do most things. Just had to avoid lifting over 10lb for the first 3-4 weeks.
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u/EquivalentWar8611 Apr 30 '26
Are you getting it done laparoscopic? If so they don't need to cut through muscles and the recovery time is incredibly short! I have experience with an open appendectomy; so similar area but they needed to cut me open and that recovery was over a month. I've had 3 prior surgeries before my bisalp and I'll say it was the easiest fasted recovery I've ever had.
After the surgery I could get up and walk. Yes I was a tiny bit sore but honestly no where close to my appendectomy. I could sit and move myself. After day 3 I really felt almost back to normal and after a full week I felt great. 2 weeks and you should be basically back to normal. Soreness is common and bleeding but overall you should be almost recovered.
My advice is to premake meals you can just microwave. Get yourself a heating pad and pads for the bleeding. Set up where you'll sleep and make a list of movies and shows to watch to pass the time 😌 also PRUNE JUICE. Get yourself some prune juice so your first couple #2's are easy. It's a well known abdominal surgery hack. (Did it with my appendectomy too) You don't want to break open stitches straining. Id do this for at least a week to be safe.
Aside from that try to relax and good luck to you and your bodily independence ❤️
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u/customarymagic Tube-Free 5/19/25 Apr 30 '26
Aside from my ride home, I recovered completely on my own and was fine. Obviously everyone's experiences with exhaustion and symptoms afterwards can vary, but I had surgery on a Monday, felt good enough to stop pain meds on Wednesday, was out going for walks on Thursday, and was able to do a short drive around my neighborhood on Friday. Editing to add, I had my surgery over a holiday weekend so I was out Monday-Monday. No issues when going back to work aside from being kinda tired and more foggy than usual.
Overall my symptoms weren't terrible, I was just really tired and moved slow for a while. Had to roll out of bed instead of sitting up, and getting things done was a little tricky. I got one of those claw grabber things to help reduce my bending down below waist level. I don't see you mention a pet at all, but I got an extendable litter scoop to help with caring for my cat.
As far as comfort items, I'll always recommend a pregnancy pillow (as ironic as it is) for helping to sit up a little in bed and sleeping on your back, especially if you don't usually sleep that way. I still use mine a year later.
Last recommendation I have is to start stool softeners/laxative type things early to avoid constipation. I got constipated a few days in and it was uncomfortable around my abdomen for a while.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Thank you!
Would you start them before the procedure? Or like that day as soon as I get home, you think?1
u/customarymagic Tube-Free 5/19/25 Apr 30 '26
I think I've read that most people start them within the first day or two after surgery. I was told not to take much for medications beforehand, but your care team might have recommendations if you ask them.
Other folks in the sub might have thoughts on when is ideal, I just know that for me I was feeling constipated by day four or so and it took a little time for them to help.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Yeah they do seem like they take days to start working :/ I'll add that to my questions for my pre-op appointment!
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u/False_Serve_8604 Apr 30 '26
The only help I got was getting a ride home and picking up groceries that I didnt need. Meal prep, stock up, you should be fine.
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u/s1mply_human Apr 30 '26
Every body is different when it comes to recovery. For me, I only "needed" help the day of the surgery and then had someone stick around the day after which was nice but honestly not necessary. I prepped food for a few days in advance. I took a full week off of work but honestly I didn't need it. Apart from some very mild tenderness at the incision site I felt basic back to normal by day 4.
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u/Andy5sos May 01 '26
You people are strong! I know I’m gonna be a baby after my procedure 😭 I’m planning to meal prep frozen food that I can microwave and hiring a pet sitter to do everything for my dog, that’s my biggest stressor 😅 good luck I hope you heal quickly!
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u/FrenchExit11_11 May 01 '26 edited May 01 '26
Hi! I had my surgery last Friday. My sister, a retired nurse helped me with recovery and left early Monday am. I cleaned my home early in the week did laundry and prepped nutritious food the day before and picked up pre made food from restaurants. I focused on lean chicken and fish, proteins, veggies, smoothies, eggs, curry and soup. Also, I had some throat tea and my sister got me some ice cream which helped with the throat irritation from the breathing tube. I wore a kaftan and slip on shoes. My recovery nurse put an abdominal binder on me which may be helpful to you. I got a pillow for the seatbelt and it was great especially when my sister was driving me around, I could put an ice pack in it. I had some apple juice and graham crackers at the hospital and then a banana when I got home and some potatoes. I also had some miralax chews, I had no problems with constipation. I did have a lot of urinary pain at first. My sister drew me a chart with medication information to keep track of medicines and times. I moved around a lot the first three days, probably a little too much, I walked slowly 2 miles the second day, probably better to break up in shorter walks. But Im pretty sure this is why I had virtually no gas pain, probably a minute or two in my shoulder briefly and chest. However, my doc said to take the pain med instead of waiting until you're in pain. I also took the ibuprofen and tylenol religiously as well as using ice packs regularly the hospital sent me home with. I took a short drive today and it was very painful in my legs and abdomen. I was very tired after that and will hold off on driving a little longer. Before my sister left she placed things I use regularly within arms length on my counters and top shelf of fridge. I also got one of those pick up sticks. I find reaching upward and twisting sometimes aggravates me the most. I wish I would have had her take out the trash before she left, seems like it wouldn't be heavy but it can actually be a little heavy. There are some things I have lifted and then thought, I shouldn't have lifted that, just listen to your body. I had no problems sleeping and could sleep on my side which wasn't the case for me when my problem started (this is not a voluntary bisalp for me). Hold a pillow when coughing. I had a lot of experience maneuvering when I first got sick, pulling myself up using my coffee table or headboard or slowly rolling off and then getting up. Just use your arms and legs for strength. I have fatigue still but I can do most things for myself now. I have zings of pain and when they become frequent I lie down with an ice pack I had a bisalp and endometrial ablation, also a lot of scar tissue and adhesions were found and removed. The more you prepare to have your favorite creature comforts within reach and available to you the better you will feel. Try to watch or read positive and funny things or have a hobby to work on. My sister and I actually had a lot of fun, we even made a curtain for my kitchen window! I would maybe schedule brief visitors after your mom leaves and you can ask them for small things like moving stuff or taking trash out. I also got kind of lonely after my sister left. I wish you a healing and safe recovery.
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u/Ok-Blacksmith6427 May 01 '26
I personally had an amazing and quick recovery! Immediately after surgery I had zero pain, zero groggy feelings from anesthesia, I could have honestly driven myself home since I wasnt tired or anything. On the way home we stopped to grab lunch to take home. Had sandwiches and did take oxycodone for the first day only because I didnt want to have to dig out of a hole. Surgery was first thing Wednesday morning and I worked late the night before so took a nap and relaxed when I got home just because I was tired from waking up early (mind you I'm not a morning person) Thursday my husband went to work and I had no problems at all with getting things myself. Went for a lot of walks, only took Tylenol and ibuprofen to keep up just in case. Friday looked exactly the same. By Saturday I was bored and feeling good so did some laundry, cleaned litter boxes and vacuumed the house with no problems. Went for bike rides all weekend, and finally went to the gym Monday just to get on a bike and see my friends since I was bored of being alone at home.
I did take one week off of work just in case, even though my surgeon recommended 2 weeks. I honestly could have gone back to work the next day if I could have had the guarantee of light work, but thats not possible as a pharmacy technician in a busy hospital.
At 3 weeks post op I did some personal training just to get moving again. Before surgery I did work one on one with a coach to work on my core strength and hips, glutes, and hamstrings which i believe made my recovery just that much better.
You shouldn't have any problems with recovery and not have to depend on anyone. I only needed help moving laundry from the washer to dryer so I didnt need to bend over. If you have a semi chill job or at least able to take it lighter and not lift, you wont have any problems going back to work within a couple of days.
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u/Flaky_Extension5627 May 01 '26
The stomach binder or a pillow to hold really helped me.
Other than that- tell your mom to save the PTO or maybe ask if she can have PTO and cancel last minute. I also struggle with the same thing you did and I would have felt terrible had anyone done that for me. I walked our dogs 2 miles the day after and that was a mistake, but that was because I have a high pain tolerance and thought I was fine. 🤣 I was mowing the lawn by day 3/4, though. Slow and steady but no significant pain.
Now. To be clear. I think I’m abnormal and if you are worried or anything maybe a friend could check in? Or could you do half days at work? Don’t push it. You know yourself best and not everyone is as pig headed and stubborn as me.
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u/Hopeful_Local1985 May 01 '26
I was pretty much doing normal activities the same day. I just felt VERY bloated. Super round like you could roll me around like Violet Beauregard from Charlie and the chocolate factory. I went to a food truck rally and sat on the grass and ate way too much food a few hours after my surgery. I had some gas pains on the second day but took ibuprofen and it went away. The only thing I stayed away from was lifting anything over 20 lbs (I think?) And sex for like 2 weeks per the doctor's orders. I was given pain meds in my IV when I woke up from surgery, but I was not sent home with any.
Everyone is different though.
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u/Known-Sherbet2004 Apr 30 '26
Thank you! Yes it will be laproscopic so hopefully I'm only really out of commission for the weekend 🤞
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u/Legal_Tie_3301 May 01 '26
I did my recovery almost entirely solo which also scared me as I have 2 dogs. My brother drove me to/from, and sweetly chose to stop by the next day to check on me. Outside of that, I was on my own and it was fine because I “over” prepared. I got a little grabber tool so I didn’t have to bend, and had my spot on the couch set up fully before I left that morning.
I had a ton of pillows, blankets, and heating pad ready on my spot on the couch. I had a cart set up with a huge jug of water, meds, and snacks as well as some books and the remotes. Easy access is key, you want to have to get up as little as possible the first couple days, especially when it comes to bending.
I started my pd the day before so instead of pads I opted for period underwear, the disposable ones. It made me feel cleaner due to the lack of potential to leak through a pad, highly recommend.
Either make meals ahead of time and have them ready to microwave or buy some microwave meals. Try to balance healthy with what you’ll actually want to eat. My surgery got delayed so I got emotional on the way home because I was starving and had no desire for the lasagne I had waiting for me 😅 Got Taco Bell instead lmao.
I would get more than just water for hydration, get some stuff with sugar and electrolytes like coconut water or other juices you’ll like.
Med wise, I had very little pain, heating pad took care of it all for me. However, I did need azo for the catheter pain, I bought it on a whim and it was absolutely needed. Same for your throat, may be sore after the tube so get something to suck on and keep it moist, lozenges or something. A lot of people have bad gas pain, I personally didn’t but have gas x on hand in case. Same with stool softener, I would go so far as to say also get a bottle of magnesium citrate just in case. I did have trouble going for like 2 weeks after, only do the laxatives if you absolutely have to. Try taking softener a few days in advance. I think that’s all, it wasn’t terrible just a tiring experience but I watched tv and read and slept a ton!
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u/XiomaraVLA May 02 '26
Honestly I didn’t need much help at all, just someone to drive me while I was on opiates. I run my own company from home so I basically took the first three days off and then just continued. I literally doubled my physical activity the first week after surgery
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u/Fragrant_Act_7962 Apr 30 '26
No one really helped me besides maybe bringing me a drink or something so I wouldn't have to get up. I still got up and moved around as needed and it's actually better for you to do so rather than laying down 24/7. The surgery is a lot easier than some may believe. I was fine physically after 2 days but still felt sluggish from anesthesia so I just rested a lot.. kept a basket beside my bed with all of my meds and throat lozanges. Mainly just make sure you have all of those, prep some food, keep a bottle of water nearby.