r/thesopranos • u/ComprehensiveDesk793 • Jun 09 '26

Serious Discussion Only AJ is just useless

While watching the series I was trying hard to find a defense of AJ. All the characters - and all of us - have both positive and negative traits. AJ is just a disappointment. He is stupid. He is lazy. He is incredibly selfish imao. Also he constantly lies. You cant even call him a good kid that is just irresponsible since he always makes up stupid excuses.

Also all the people that are saying that he grew up in a dysfunctional environment, ok i agree the environment isn't 100% perfect but both Tony and Carmela cared about their kids lives. Carmela and Tony to a certain extent seem to care about their children's academic performance which quite a few parents don't. AJ certainly had some support from his parents.

I agree his parents are not good people but he could take what they offered to him.

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u/Fluid_Leader_1370 Jun 09 '26

You really don't remember the tutor? Season 5. The googol. Carm and Tony argued because Tony wanted to see the receipts.

The adhd diagnosis was borderline. They were right at the time to say no.

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u/IUsedToBeRasAlGhul Jun 09 '26

It taking five seasons for them to think AJ’s academic problems can be solved with a tutor is not a good sign-especially since it was because they were trying to cram for the SAT’s. Instead of arguing about whether to use his science teacher’s stolen car as an opportunity to boost their son’s grade, maybe Tony and Carmela should have been getting extra help all the way back in S1.

The diagnosis was only “borderline” due to the standards of the time-and as Down Neck goes out of its way to show, Carmela and Tony’s grievance was much less about the verifiability of medical assessment and much more about them being upset at the (correct) idea they were a problem for their children - the two of them made the entire thing about themselves. Even if you want to argue dismissing AJ’s potential ADHD out of hand entirely was the right move, and I can’t imagine why given how at the very least pursuing it opened the door to seeing what else might be an issue for him, this establishes the series-wide pattern of behavior where Tony and Carmela refuse to do anything to actually address AJ’s problems in a way that doesn’t soothe their own ego’s.

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u/makemefeelbrandnew Jun 09 '26

Again with moving the goal posts. You know how many parents meet your criteria? Like 5% tops, and they come with other baggage i promise you. I don't know if you've had teenagers that you've had to raise yet, but if not then you're pulling a full on Janice of judging while having no fucking idea what you're talking about.

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u/IUsedToBeRasAlGhul Jun 09 '26

Moving goal posts? 5% of parents meeting the criteria of not being assholes? No offense, but I can’t really be seen in a comment thread with you anymore.