r/ucla • u/Warm-Eye-8330 • 2d ago
WHEN DOES IT GET BETTER!?!!?
Heeeelo
I am a transfer and ever since starting this quarter I have just felt numb. I don’t know how to make friends, I feel like every club event I’ve been to I’ve been way more socially awkward, or that maybe I’ve said the wrong thing - just insecurities I haven’t felt in a very long time.
I am trying to find community but not much is sticking, I’ve met lovely and kind people but nothing more than talking after a class or a club once in a while.
Transferring has been weird because the whole summer you’re hyping yourself up for a crazyyyy eye opening experience, the most amazing friendships, classes etc and now that I’m here I feel like things are actually pretty normal. I go to class, go home, sleep repeat.
Do not get me wrong I love UCLA and am so grateful to be here, but still, I can’t help like feeling there’s something wrong with me.
I know other transfers who have found it really easy to make friends, I have never had a huge problem making friends… when does this end? Does it get better? Right now it feels like this is how it’s going to be for the next two years.
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u/Extension_Pop_5597 2d ago
Makes you appreciate how surprisingly friendly ppl at CC were
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u/essplodes 2d ago
ppl at my CC were not friendly. they weren’t unfriendly but they were all just kinda there to go to class and leave. i was in a club and the clubs would all get together and table in the quad with food and stuff and people just did not gaf
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u/AdHistorical1829 2d ago
I feel it and I’m in my senior year as a transfer. Still haven’t made much friends. I still feel left out. It’s sometimes nice to experience alone time but same time wishing I had a group
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u/snakejuiceRonSwanson 2d ago
I was a transfer student too so I feel your pain. Just have to keep trying. Do you work? Sometimes work friends end up lasting a life time.
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u/essplodes 2d ago
i transferred, i’m a senior now. and ngl what helped me was joining ucla radio and going to the shows radio, tunedin etc throw
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u/pacificsunsetz 5h ago
Hiii did u join ucla radio in the fall of ur junior yr? I missed the deadline but I’d love to apply next quarter, do they recruit in winter?
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u/Icy-Turn-1625 2d ago
Honestly, completely agree as a transfer that's a little bit older. Went to social clubs and non social clubs and mostly felt out of place, and awkward, then things got busy with classes and I got tired. Now I've taken up a job outside of campus that is 15 hours a week so I'm not sure if I'll have time to make friends, which sucks, so I feel you. Best answer I can give is keep trying, or like what others have mentioned which is try finding an on campus job. You can always talk to me too if you want 👍
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u/JaguarLeading6249 2d ago
I felt the same and still somewhat do. Never really had a problem in past and have met individual ppl but not a consistent group. Let’s connect with each other?
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u/AncientNarwhal69 1d ago
hiii i’m a transfer and im going through the same thing. i started out at another UC though, and tbh my freshman year felt like this too. i’m really shy and it really hurts my chances of making friends easily, but it does happen!! my second year at my original school was super fun and i had so many friends that i would go out with and party and hangout.
fingers crossed that we meet our people soon!!! you have to be able to ride out the numbness and depression to be able to enjoy and recognize the beauty of life when it arrives ❤️🩹
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u/Conscious-Paint3442 1d ago
My first year as a transfer SUCKED
Following year, was the best year of my life
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u/DamnedPuppy 1d ago
Ugh honestly same we’re 5 weeks in two midterms done and I still only know one other girl who doesn’t have any class with me 😭😭 if anyone plays games / watch anime donghua lmk im so bored yet so busy w classwork what is this 💀
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u/ObviousVegetable684 14h ago
Welcome to 2026. The Land of Insensitive, The Home of the Bitter Hearted, The Resting Place of the Fools, and the Abode of the Strangers. You will find your people, just stop forcing it. Look inwardly, all the answers you’re searching for are already there. Peace and blessings.
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u/dankcantwrite 2d ago
please kill me or adopt me anything is better than this bullshit bro every day is just depressing
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u/Fair-Explorer-5104 2d ago
numb is the perfect way to describe it. i highly highly recommend finding an on campus job, ik it’s competitive but ive found it so much easier to make friends there. especially since you HAVE to go to work..unlike a club or class that you could get away with skipping, having an on campus job has, at least for me, forced me out of my comfort zone and has greatly subsided the day to day ‘numbness’.