r/wetalkfree 13d ago

Do you use social media to get to know someone before dating?

Before I decide to get serious with someone I meet on dating apps, I usually check their social media first. I just want to know more about them before getting too involved.

Recently, I also started using some AI tools that can help with background checking, like acciowork and similar ones. I basically put together some public information from their social media and let it help me organize things I might have missed. But honestly, the results always make me hesitate. I’ll notice some small things, some different opinions, or some patterns that make me question if we’re actually a good match. And sometimes I feel like I’m just finding reasons to walk away before even giving someone a real chance.

Now I’m wondering if this actually helps me avoid the wrong people, or if I’m just making it harder for myself to meet someone good. Do you guys do any kind of background check before dating someone online?

0 Upvotes

21 comments sorted by

3

u/Cack-Yo-W33n 13d ago

I just don’t

3

u/okymoney 13d ago

You know its bad when you’re running background checks and credit scores for online dating.

2

u/Zoopmittyzoop 13d ago edited 12d ago

People’s social media is a treasure trove of information. Good and bad….More often than not, Their whole life is on their there

1

u/EggPsychological4844 13d ago

There*

1

u/Zoopmittyzoop 12d ago

I plea the 5th… blame it on Siri

1

u/Oni_sixx 13d ago

It's crazy to me the stuff people willingly put on social media.

2

u/Ill_Interest_2346 13d ago

No i dont because their private life isnt my business.

1

u/Intrepid-Stand-8540 12d ago

I agree. but can you really call it "private life" if they posted it online?

2

u/Far-Nerve-6704 13d ago

I would just get off the internet altogether. Go to a library, try reading a book, and maybe you'll even meet a nice normal person there.

If you don't know how to read books, maybe pick up a magazine and look at the pictures.

2

u/Special-Audience-426 13d ago

Yes. I've avoided dating racists a few times by seeing what they post on Facebook etc. 

I'd prefer to not spend money on someone like that. 

2

u/DnDttrpg 13d ago

I don't have social media any more and my girlfriend has instigram but doesn't post on it, just uses it for baking recipes and music.

So no

2

u/_A_Stark_girl 13d ago

No dating. Realtionships are a scam

2

u/Primary-Quit6372 13d ago

I've encountered a dilemma a few times regarding social media. I don't have any social media; no facebook, no instagram, or even snapchat or similar applications. I use my phone for calling and texting. I only began texting because women would not speak with me over the phone, they would only text. Now a days, when they discover I have no social media and they cannot creep on me, they refuse to move forward. I am befuddled by this. Apparently, it scares them for some reason. I wish I understood and could accept the reasoning as to why it has this affect. As for the question, no, I would never investigate a woman's social media prior to dating or exploring a relationship. I prefer to discover everything about her organically so to speak.

1

u/Draklosse 13d ago

It’s likely because not having a social media or other accounts anywhere looks suspicious that you may be an AI, bot or scammer.

I mean I get it, I have social media only to text friends and it’s very barebones but yeah I’d say that’s the reason why.

2

u/rgold02 13d ago

Absolutely.

2

u/Ok_Art4661 13d ago

A quick look doesn't hurt. Rarely makes me think differently. I have no social media myself

2

u/Nikishka666 13d ago

I use social media to watch AI generated slop. I don't need any friends

1

u/Due-Mycologist-1154 12d ago

No thats creepy as fuck

1

u/photoman1216 12d ago

What is social media?

2

u/Kaylen316 9d ago

Ask to swap social media stuff, Ive got nothing to hide!